Settling the Score
by calladragon
Summary: Vengeance Volker Style.
1. Chapter 1

**PLEASE READ: This is a DARK fic. This is NOT a "RAPE" fic. It will not end darkly. **

**I am far more interested in the psychological affects playing Volker games would have on Lisbon, Jane, and the team than I am in writing a lurid, graphic piece. That doesn't mean this isn't "M" or that it won't be a disturbing five or six chapter piece. **

**All I'm asking is that you have enough respect for my desire to explore an interesting character we didn't see enough of to not read this story if you're a) underage or b) going to get distressed with me for writing this piece as some of my readers have occassionally done in the past. I have enough respect for you as my reader to post a warning that's probably stronger than the piece itself will be. But, since I haven't written it, I honestly don't know how it'll turn out or if I can actually pull it off for that matter.**

**I am working on the last 4-5 chapters of Ouroboros and will post them asap. ~Calla**

**#**

Looking up from his cup of tea, a fragrant red tinted China black, a hint of a smile played across Jane's lips as Lisbon swept through the door in her typical no-nonsense style only to be stopped midstep by one well aimed glare from the hostess. A deceptively bubbly blonde, he'd learned early on that particular minx was a barracuda in disguise and she took her job seriously. As his companion would soon learn, _Trevor's_ was not their usual divey watering hole. Things were done differently here. The front door was manned with purpose and that forgotten CBI badge still swinging from Lisbon's hip wasn't cutting any slack with Amy.

However, announcing she was with Patrick Jane did.

Watching his "date" following closely on Amy's sky high heels, Jane took the opportunity to study Lisbon's appearance surreptitiously. Those niggling stress lines were finally gone. She looked younger, more relaxed, and far prettier now that Volker's arraignment was over. If he was a betting man, and he was, based on the luminescence of her countenance he'd say bail was denied.

That was a good thing for everyone.

The man was a true blue sociopath getting off on the kill…One who liked harming women…And one who'd wanted to hurt Lisbon real bad….

That realization on Jane's part had changed everything.

Not readily apparent to his adoring public, he'd caught that nasty vibe in Volker's dealings with his favorite Agent and reacted accordingly. He'd let the sicko know, in no uncertain terms, he was going down. And he was going down fast. Jane had backed his words with actions and Volker's well laid plans had raveled before disbelieving eyes.

So, they'd won the skirmish.

And they'd brought the creeper down.

But, they hadn't won the battle.

They had yet to _keep_ him down.

Jane was under no illusions their job was done. Not by a long shot. A lot could happen between incarceration and conviction especially with vermin like Thomas Volker. Though contained for the moment, the man still had access to mighty big guns…Guns big enough to rock their world with a whisper.

That, more than anything, had him greatly concerned.

Thanks to his infamous past, Jane was intimately familiar with the subtle ins and outs of extortion, intimidation, and shady politics among the Volkers of the world. While not nearly as rich as most of his prey, he'd once navigated amongst the most powerful sharks in the water with consummate ease. His talents had gotten him where money never could and Jane had reveled in the challenge. He'd played their games acquiring his fair share of what they'd offered without hesitation or remorse never touching their wives and daughters in the passing. Though he could have, he hadn't. He wasn't that kind of man. Had he not already possessed a lovely family of his own. But, their booze, their money, and their dirty little secrets were another matter. He'd collected plenty of those.

So, thanks to his dubious past, Jane knew better than either Bertram or Lisbon that no matter their thoughts on Volker's present circumstance, the volleys were far from over.

As valiant a fight as they'd given to date, they could still lose the war. Volker was a slippery fish and the hook through his jaw not particularly strong.

Rising to his feet, Jane shook off his unpleasant thoughts in favor of greeting the vibrant, attractive woman standing in front of him. It had been a long time since he'd noted the fire in her eyes and that healthy glow in her cheeks. Those things had disappeared shortly after the Cassie Flood case started. While he'd admit to briefly adding to her strain, most of the fault for his "Boss's" condition could be laid squarely on the doorstep of a sadistic s.o.b.

Lisbon had had just cause in the following weeks for showing up at _his_ place the time or two she had once the Volker debacle began in earnest. She hadn't revealed much more than she had at the CBI; just shown up at his door when the stress became unbearable much as he'd done her over the years. She'd even spent a couple of nights curled beside him modestly swathed from chin to knees in one of his shirts when she'd not wanted to be alone snoring and drooling on his fluffy down pillows. Not having a couch to offer as she did, all that really mattered was Lisbon felt safe in the end and Jane had done everything in his power to see that she did.

He'd ignored the interesting undercurrents swirling between them since before Luther's death and offered her a warm, shielding body instead…an innocuous body fully capable of ignoring the feel and scent of warm Lisbon against him…even if his mind was having a much harder time wrapping itself so innocently around a situation he'd fantasized about many times. Jane finally understood the price Lisbon had paid over the years in comforting him if that look he saw in her eyes in unguarded moments was as real as he believed it to be.

As well as he knew the woman, Lisbon was the one person Jane couldn't read as well as he claimed he could. Perhaps because his observations were clouded by too many unacknowledged feelings of his own. He honestly didn't know.

What he did know was he'd done his best to lay her fears to rest never asking her to share her nightmares. Or reveal what Volker had done to disturb her so. Were Lisbon ready, she would have told him what he wanted to know.

Jane had known instinctively whatever game the monster behind the pretty face was playing was beyond reprehensible. Was so far out there he'd unsettled a seasoned, heavily armed cop like Teresa Lisbon which wasn't easily done. She might be cute as a button, quite pretty even; but, she was bad assed to the bone with a mean upper cut and a determination that wouldn't stop. He'd admired her fortitude from the start even when he wasn't sure he liked her very much.

But, Lisbon was known to break on occasion. When there was no-one around to see her shame…Or when that no-one was incapable of seeing her as less than she truly was… Jane had held her that time or two and ignored her tears letting her know without words he had her back when she was ready. She had but to say the words as she eventually did.

He'd earned the right to keep her safe over the years. He still marveled at times that the woman trusted him as much as she did. Her confidence wasn't easily won.

"Lisbon." Jane openly studied her much as he would any other attractive woman catching his eye noting she wore exactly the same outfit she'd worn this morning except for her blouse.

She'd thought enough of their evening to make that tiny, but significant, change and that pleased his masculine pride. Pleased him far more than anything so seemingly insignificant should.

While her suit was the same dressy tailored black suit jacket and pants with the subtle rhinestone buttons she'd worn into work, Lisbon had changed her muted turquoise dress tee for a bright cobalt silk top he'd never seen. The cross necklace adorning her neck was the one she usually wore as were the dainty gold hoops affixed to her ears exactly as he'd expected. Her strappy heels were a tad higher than the norm, her blouse a slightly deeper "v", and her makeup more night than day. There was nothing indiscrete in the picture she presented, just more relaxed and little less stiffly professional in a way Jane found more feminine and appealing than he usually found Senior Agent Teresa Lisbon of the CBI. Not that he didn't find his boss appealing, he certainly did. He just found this version of her infinitely more so.

Resisting the urge to drag his fingers through her dark locks, Jane decided he liked Lisbon's hair that way…softer without the bangs. He always had and he might tell her so.

"Sorry I'm late." Lisbon apologized as she slid into the chair Jane waited patiently to ease under the white cloth covered table. "Bertram was long winded."

She'd just left a not too brief debriefing with her big boss twenty minutes ago concerning the outcome of Volker's preliminary hearing. As a result, she was a good three quarters of an hour late meeting him. She'd not been sure Jane would still be here as he'd not answered his phone any of the times she'd called. She was pleasantly surprised he was.

"Did you expect him to be any other way?" Jane asked knowing she'd thought he might leave.

He wouldn't. It simply wasn't necessary to answer his phone as he'd known what was going on. Bertram was running off at the mouth and Lisbon had no choice but to listen. She'd get here when she got here and that was fine by him. He'd sip his tea and people watch in the interim.

"Not when our conversation concerned a fish as big as Tommy Volker." Lisbon reached over to take a sip of Jane's tea deciding it was tasty, if strong, for a change. "That's not bad."

"I'm going to turn you into a tea connoisseur yet." He'd start by ordering her a cup of her own if she kept stealing his China black.

"Not going to happen; but, if you can eat my food, I can sip your tea." Lisbon stated remembering the way he'd scavenged her dinner while they'd combed that deposition on a night not so long ago.

They'd ordered another round of takeout long before they were done. Picking at what was left of her lunch hadn't cut if for either of them. Lisbon hadn't realized at the time that they'd continued sharing a plate as they'd done earlier. She'd justified it in her mind afterwards by claiming one plate took up less space than two. She suspected Jane hadn't really cared either way. Sanitary of not, he didn't seem to mind sharing with her…unless it was tea.

"I suppose turnabout is fair play." Jane agreed offering her another sip.

"Nice place." Lisbon's eyes swept from one side of the restaurant to the other as she nudged Jane's cup back in his direction.

"Yes, it is." He agreed. "I thought it would be appropriate to celebrate Volker's fall from grace."

"I suppose it is." Lisbon glanced at the menu. "It's also got a waiting list three weeks long. How did you get around that?"

"Maybe I didn't." Jane quietly admitted.

"You've had reservations for two for the past three weeks?" Lisbon quirked a brow in disbelief that he hadn't just cut to the chase by hypnotizing someone to get his way as he'd done in the past.

"It was closer to four weeks actually." Jane lifted his cup to his lips ignoring the slight smudge of lipstick against the rim.

Lisbon's lipstick actually had a pleasant taste he'd not noticed before. Not that he'd ever been in a position to notice. He hadn't been. While they held hands on occasion and had been known to hug, they certainly did not kiss.

"Seriously?" Lisbon perused the menu and decided she'd start with one of those fancy specialty beers.

Maybe she'd order an Irish Red Ale or a Pumpkin Stout. Or maybe she'd settle for a more expensive red wine than she usually ordered since all of this was going on Jane's tab.

"Yes, seriously, Lisbon." Jane discretely signaled for their server. "I can be a patient man."

"Who was the lucky lady you had in mind?" It wasn't her as Volker hadn't been in custody four weeks ago.

Lisbon smirked at the thought of her consultant on an honest to goodness date. Truthfully, she couldn't imagine the awkwardness of it. Jane had been out of the dating scene for years and while he was a charming man…She really did not want to go there.

What she did know was his date with Kristina Frye hadn't gone so well and she doubted he'd taken Lorelei out on the town. In fact, she knew better. He'd told her precisely what happened and how it all came down before he was done. Before they'd finally made up and the pieces between them had fallen comfortably back into place. From Lisbon's perspective, what he'd had with the other woman hardly qualified as a date. Any more than her "indiscretion" with a certain dark haired billionaire reminding her too much of Jane had been a date.

Then again, with Jane, who really knew how his mind worked?

What happened between he and Lorelei was whatever he chose to call it in the darkest recesses of his mind. That memory belonged to him.

"I always assumed it would be you." Everything about her response from the startled darting of her eyes to the sudden dead air was as predictable as the rising of the sun. "We have been known to do things like this every now and again." He calmly reminded her.

And they did…Once in a blue moon.

It beat hanging in her lonely apartment or his mangy hotel room wishing for decent company. They'd even shared a sundae not that long ago. Lisbon was still put out with him for eating the cherry on top though he'd gotten her another to take its place. Apparently, it wasn't the same which made absolutely no sense. Go figure. It must be a woman thing.

"I suppose we have." Lisbon agreed thankful for a way out as she lifted the menu and studied the wine list.

"You look nice." Jane said casually not pushing the point as he pretended to read his menu as well.

"Thanks." Glancing at Jane, Lisbon decided he cleaned up nicely when he wanted to and he'd obviously wanted to tonight for whatever reason. "So do you."

Lisbon didn't miss the smile or the raised hand as their server suddenly appeared by Jane's side.

"Adam, the lady will have the Champagne Lager and an appetizer of crab cakes with horseradish remoulade. I'll have the same with the salmon cakes." Jane was pleasantly surprised that Lisbon didn't protest his high handedness in spite of his silent plea that she not. "Both are quite excellent."

"I'm sure they are." Lisbon agreed not sure how she felt about his ordering for her. She'd not expected that and wasn't sure how to take it. As long as he didn't do it again, she'd let it slide. "You've been here before."

"I've been here several times since it opened." Jane answered honestly unwilling to volunteer he was here every Thurday night at six forty five on the dot when they weren't working a case.

"Really?" Somehow that wasn't as strange as it seemed.

"It's a great place to people watch." One of his favorite past times as Lisbon already knew.

"Why do I get the feeling you have a standing reservation here?" She watched their server sit their Lagers in front of them.

"Because I do." Jane confirmed her guess. "My regular seat is right over there at the bar." He motioned towards one of two barstools haunting the end of the long mahogany bar in a darkened corner.

"Which explains why the lovely hostess knew right where to take me without looking at her trusty seating chart." Lisbon took a sip of her drink enjoying the smooth flavor. "And why they didn't kick our butts out over my being so late."

"I suppose it does." Jane agreed. That and the fact the couple behind them were no shows had certainly helped. "However, I wasn't lying when I said I waited four weeks for a reservation for two. It's far more difficult to arrange than the most undesirable seat at the bar for one."

"Your inside connections don't help?" Lisbon poked at her crab cake deciding she liked the fact it was more succulent lump meat than binders even better than the heavenly smell.

"Not as well as one might think." Jane smiled watching Lisbon's eyes widen as the pungent horseradish in her remoulade burned her nose. He'd forgotten to warn her that sauce, while delicious, had a serious bite to it.

"Well, I'm glad you invited me here." Man was she ever if her crab cakes were anything to go by.

"I'm glad you came." Jane forked a bite of salmon cake and dipped it in chili horseradish tartar sauce before carrying the nibble to his mouth.

"Did you expect me to turn down an invite to a place like this?" Lisbon set her fork on her plate.

"I never gave it that much thought one way or the other." Jane sipped his Lager as he watched Lisbon watching the couple across the way.

"You knew I'd say yes." She wasn't sure how she felt about that.

"I hoped you would. What can I say? I enjoy your company both in and outside of work…Besides, who else would I ask? The team would kick my ass if I asked Van Pelt, Kristina still thinks she's a ghost, and most of my past flirtations are either in jail or parts unknown trying to avoid extradition and possible imprisonment." Jane said thinking of Erica Flynn among several others.

"Sounds like you have lousy taste in women with the exception of Grace and you're right that we would kick your ass starting with Wayne who'd have my blessing." Lisbon said only half joking.

Jane obviously found Van Pelt attractive. What red blooded man wouldn't? She was a beauty on her worst day. Mercifully, he didn't appear to be interested in that way. Grace would never survive tangling with their mentalist. He'd turn her inside out before he was done.

"Then I guess it's good that I'm more interested in her Boss." Again, Lisbon let his remark slide without visibly reacting beyond that slight widening of her eyes saying she wasn't quite sure she'd just heard what she thought he'd said. "Here comes Adam with our steaks."

He'd given them just long enough to finish their first course as a good server should.

As for Lisbon, she was so predictable. He'd known she was going to order one of the bigger steaks on the menu with the salad, ranch dressing on the side, and a fully dressed potato before the words ever came out of her mouth. How she stayed so small with that truck driver's appetite was beyond him. Or maybe it wasn't. She was a fairly athletic little thing compared to most of the other female agents around the CBI. He'd struggled a few minutes torn between steak and poultry finally deciding on the Filet which he knew was always perfectly grilled. Watching Lisbon tuck into her steak, Jane lifted his knife and shook his head slightly knowing she was going to clean her plate and want dessert before she was done.

If there was one thing Teresa Lisbon was not, it was a cheap date even when it wasn't really a date. Or maybe it was. He suspected neither of them really knew as they hadn't attached any definitions beyond celebrating Volker's downfall to their evening.

"Jane?" Lisbon asked from behind her Lager glass.

"Yes?" He was surprised she'd stopped eating while there was anything on her plate.

Lisbon wasn't that much of talker when there was steak on her plate. Neither was he for that matter.

"I think we should do this again, my treat. The service is excellent and the food is good. It certainly lives up to the reviews." Lisbon observed quietly somewhat surprised she was enjoying the evening as much as she was.

"We can do that or you can just come with me any Thursday night you want to come. I'm sure we can find two seats at that end of the bar. While considered the worse seats in the house, they're excellent for people watching, Eric gives exceptional service, and the food is every bit as good." Jane offered.

"I'd like that." She didn't really care if they sat at a table or at the bar. Jane would be equally good company either place and she liked bar food if they even had a separate menu.

"The only condition is it's my treat. My place, my treat. You can treat at your place." Jane said.

"I don't have a place." Lisbon resisted the urge to jab him for being difficult.

"Yes, you do." Jane reminded her.

"The greasy cop dive on 7th street." The place with the killer chicken wings they all liked.

"That's the one." Jane agreed as he picked up the dessert menu.

"Maybe we can hit there on Saturday night. We're not on call this weekend and we just wrapped up Volker. If we're lucky we can take Smithson and James to the cleaners again." Lisbon was about as fond of the two SAC PD officers as they were of her since they'd made it their business to make fun of Jane on a regular basis; but, they shot a mean game of pool and that was worth setting their differences aside for.

"Sounds like a plan." He was up for the challenge if Lisbon was.

"Good. I'll meet you there about 7:30. Smithson usually gets there around eight and James by eight thirty. That should give us time to grab something to eat and warm up." By her estimation, they'd be done by nine and she'd be in bed by ten. Plenty of time to get a good night's sleep and hit early Mass on Sunday morning.

"I'll be there." Jane handed over the dessert menu smirking at the way Lisbon's eyes lit up when she saw what it was. "It's getting late so we need to go ahead and order if we're going to."

"We're going to." Lisbon took the menu from his hand ignoring the look on Jane's face saying he was about to bring up something she didn't want to discuss. "I'm not going to like what you're about to say am I?"

"Probably not." Jane agreed.

"Then let's get it over with." Lisbon said knowing he wouldn't give up. "I want to enjoy the rest of the evening."

And anticipate doing it again and again. Lisbon refused to consider why she was doing anything as reckless as willingly spending _planned_ time with Jane off the job. Whatever they were doing felt intriguingly dangerous and guiltily like mixing business with pleasure. Glancing at her mostly empty plate, Lisbon decided what the hell. She'd spent plenty of time with Jane outside of work. Granted, always haphazardly arranged at the last minute, not carefully planned with forethought as they were doing now. But, what did that matter? They weren't Wayne and Grace. They weren't breaking any rules and regulations. They were just hanging out. Hanging out and innocently blowing off steam as two good friends.

"What did Volker say or do that finally made you ask for my help?" Jane asked quietly forcing Lisbon to look up from her plate and abandon whatever thoughts had that slight blush staining her cheeks.

Lisbon shot him a look that seemed to say, 'Three dead bodies lying in the street wasn't enough?' It was. But, it was all the things happening before that Lisbon never shared he was concerned about. The things that had prompted her to ask for his help prior to the three dead bodies scenario. Those were the things that could matter now.

"Nothing really." Lisbon kept her eyes evasively focused on the dessert page pretending she hadn't already made up her mind.

"You were clearly frightened. If he didn't say anything, it was something he did." Jane watched her set the menu aside and waited for her response.

"It wasn't anything he said or anything he did." Lisbon forced herself to look at him as their server mysteriously reappeared at her side yet again. "I'd like a cup of coffee and the chocolate caramel brownie a la mode." The old fashioned dessert reminded her of happier times when she'd been a kid and her Mom was still alive. She hadn't expected to find something so extraordinarily ordinary on the menu of such an exclusive place.

Jane placed his order for the same deciding he could suffer through a cup of coffee for a change. It might make Lisbon more willing to talk if he did and he wasn't above using any trick in his arsenal.

"Lisbon, honestly, you've always been a terrible liar and you still are." Reaching out he lightly patted her hand in a manner only he could get away with.

"Fine. He said things like I looked good and I'd been working out." The words sounded ridiculous to her ears and she couldn't believe she was repeating them. "It wasn't really what he said. It was how he said it and how he looked saying it. He made my skin crawl."

"He frightened you." Jane said what Lisbon wouldn't.

"I don't know if I'd say frightened exactly." That was as close as she'd come to admitting the truth even with Jane. "He made me feel dirty in some crazy way."

She'd wanted a bath and when she'd finally gotten one, she'd almost scrubbed her skin raw. There was something about Volker that seemed to cling to her long after he was gone. Maybe it was the look in his eyes…Like he was doing unspeakably horrible things to her and enjoying every second of it.

She didn't have to be Jane to know Volker was dangerously cracked in a seriously sadistic manner.

"Earth to Lisbon." Lisbon became aware of Jane's hand lightly gripping hers and knew she'd betrayed more than she meant to by the look on her face.

"I'm okay." She watched Adam set their coffee and dessert in front of them before discretely exiting in a manner saying he was experienced, excellent at his job, and worth every bit of the generous tip she was sure Jane would leave him.

Initial impressions aside, Jane wasn't a stingy man. The handsome young man would be well compensated for his superior efforts in serving them. He'd made it his business to know when to appear and when to disappear and that was worth something to both of them.

"Yes, you are, and I want you to stay that way." As much as he didn't want to spoil their meal, there were a few things he needed to say.

"Meaning?" Lisbon added cream and sugar to her coffee as she clung to Jane's every word.

"Watch your back and don't put yourself in any danger until Volker's put away." Holding Lisbon's eyes, Jane mirrored her gesture in adding cream and sugar to his cup. He wasn't fond of coffee; but, suitably doctored he found it tolerable once in a while. "Once he is; verify he's where he's supposed to be on a regular basis. The man has friends in very high places. Friends with the kind of secrets killing him might bring to light where helping him disappear would keep them hidden. Were that to happen, I'm sure he'd pay you a visit on the way out of town. "

"You may be right." Lisbon agreed taking a sip of her coffee and adding a little more cream.

"I am; but, that's all I'm going to say on the matter." Jane decided, if one must drink coffee, his cup was quite good considering what it was. "I'd rather enjoy our dessert than completely spoil our evening by saying anything more."

"You haven't spoiled our evening and I'd much rather know you're guarding my back than saying what I want to hear." Lisbon scooped a bite of brownie and ice cream into her mouth deciding it was almost as good as the one her mom used to make.

"Remember that when I walk you to your car and you keep reminding me that you're fully capable of taking care of yourself and of exactly how many guns you have on your person." Jane motioned for Adam to bring him the check knowing Lisbon would be ready to leave soon. They'd both had a long day and it was getting late.

"I don't think that will be a problem." Lisbon said as she watched Adam refill her coffee cup and take Jane's credit card. "I parked beside you."

"That saves me some trouble." Jane sat back in his chair deciding perhaps he'd eaten too much.

"I'm going to need to go soon. I still have to stop by the market on the way home." Lisbon glanced at her watch debating whether she'd rather stop by the store tonight or go through a busy drive through on the way into work in the morning. Sleeping in a few extra minutes beat the hassle of fast food. "Don't even think about following me. If I see you car anywhere near the market or my house I'll shoot you. Volker was denied bail. We're both perfectly safe for the moment."

"I guess we are." Jane agreed. "Don't take any unnecessary chances."

"The same goes for you." Lisbon watched Jane tuck his credit card back in his wallet before pulling her chair out.

"I'm always careful." Jane said as rested his palm against the small of her back. "I don't have an arsenal of weaponry on my person."

"You don't need one. All you need to do is hypnotize someone." Lisbon quipped as they walked out the door well aware of how ridiculous she sounded.

#

"Where's Lisbon?" Jane queried as he ambled into the bullpen white paper bag and tea cup in hand fully expecting to find his last night's dinner date seated on the corner of Cho's desk already in full work mode.

"Not in yet." Rigsby didn't bother looking up from his computer screen as he unerringly took a massive bite of the raspberry jelly filled doughnut he'd snatched from the box he'd taken from Jane earlier in the break room before laying the pastry aside.

"That's not like Lisbon." Jane commented to no one in particular.

"Maybe she wanted to sleep in." Van Pelt added her two cents while a silent Cho watched everyone speculatively.

"That's not like Lisbon." Jane repeated feeling the first tingle of uneasiness.

Lisbon did not sleep in. It wasn't her style.

"It wouldn't be the first time Lisbon's done something unexpected." Rigsby licked jelly off of his fingertip ignoring Kimball's look of open disgust.

"Really? Are you sure about that? She's pretty predictable when it comes to things like getting to work on time. She takes that whole Team Leader setting an example thing seriously." Jane reminded Rigsby and Van Pelt though, by the not so inscrutable look on Cho's face, he didn't think he needed to remind the Korean Agent of the same.

"Fine, we'll play your game. If she's not at home sleeping or in the shower and she's not here, where do you think Lisbon is?" Rigsby leaned back in his chair fixing Jane with an aggravated stare.

"Volker has her." Jane said the one thing no one thought to hear and got the expected reaction.

"You're crazy." Rigsby shot Jane a glare saying he wasn't up for the melodrama. "Volker's in a prison cell and the Boss is out there cussing a blue streak looking for a way to circumvent traffic."

"I hope you're right." Jane took a calming sip of tea as he set the white bag containing Lisbon's favorite pastry on his rarely used desk clearly rethinking his previous insanity.

"Don't go all spooky on us because you can't make brownie points with the Boss." Rigsby knew Jane well enough to know he'd probably done something to get on Lisbon's last nerve and wanted to smooth troubled waters.

Why else would he bring her a separate treat when he'd already brought a dozen doughnuts for the rest of the team?

"I'd say dinner at _Trevor's _last night is all the brownie points I'll need for a while." And it probably was.

"You can't be serious? You took Lisbon to _Trevor's_? How'd you even get reservations in the first place?" Van Pelt shot Rigsby a look clearly saying that would be one way to get her attention again.

Rigsby shot Jane a look conveying his thanks for throwing him under the bus when it came to regaining Van Pelt's affections.

"I waited the four weeks like anyone else. The day before the night rolled around, I asked Lisbon to go with me and she accepted." Jane continued.

"Is there something we need to know?" Cho asked what they all wanted to find out.

Things had been kind of hinky between Lisbon and Jane for a while. They'd seemed much too close without doing anything to make anyone feel that way. Unless you wanted to call holding hands in the desert weird and out of the ordinary. Who knew with those two?

"I don't think so." The status of his relationship with Lisbon was none of their business. Not that there was anything to tell. But, still, she wouldn't appreciate the discussing of her private life. "Think about it? Who wants to eat alone in a fancy restaurant when you can do it with a friend?" Jane saw no need to admit he was a regular at the bar. "Actually, Lisbon met me there. I thought it would be a nice way to celebrate Volker's incarceration. She seemed to appreciate the gesture."

Jane's tone said he still wasn't comfortable with the current situation. But, he wasn't in a panic either. Not yet. He was doing his best to step back and take a page from the team's play book. In this instance, it was probably best to exhaust the common sense possibilities before jumping into insanity with both feet. Lisbon would not appreciate them bursting in on her bath.

Then again, he wasn't totally at ease with the lack of Lisbon's familiar presence either. He'd walked her to her car at a reasonable hour and seen her off. There was no reason she shouldn't be here at her regular time. None except one.

"Wayne, how many times has your boss overslept in the decade you've known her?" Jane tossed out there hoping, for once, his memory was wrong.

"Never." Rigsby didn't have to think about it.

Lisbon was never late because she was usually so early even being late for her wasn't being late by anyone else's estimation.

"I rest my case." Jane's tone was far calmer than he felt.

"Jane, Volker was denied bail." Rigsby tried again. "He's rotting in that cell where he's going to spend the rest of his crummy, nutjob life."

"Ah, Wayne, he's not." Van Pelt looked up from her computer screen. "The ruling was overturned. Volker was released last night."

"Shit." Cho said exactly what Jane was thinking.

"Come on, Guys, Volker's already half way to some country without an extradition treaty. He's not going to hang around messing with Lisbon when his freedom's on the line." Rigsby tried again unable to get his mind around the possibility Jane's whacked supposition was right.

"You're wrong." Jane fixed the Agent with a penetrating stare forcing him to accept his words. "He's not looking over his shoulder for the rest of his life. Volker's not that kind of man. The way he sees it, he's got nothing left to lose. He might as well get his vengeance while he can. Have a little perverse fun at Lisbon's expense."

"What do you mean?" Grace perked up at his words. "He's already lost everything. The evidence against him is airtight."

"Yes, it is, and the biggest thing holding it all together is about this high with dark hair and bright green eyes." Jane held his hand right below his eyes. "With Lisbon out of the way, that air tight evidence isn't so airtight…It isn't that hard to make disappear."

"Not when you have friends in high places and the only real witness is a kid." Van Pelt observed having seen it all before. "He really is another Red John."

"Yeah, Grace, I suppose he is. Not as bloody, but every bit as narcissistic, cunning, and twisted." Jane agreed. "Call Lisbon's cell and her apartment again. If she doesn't answer, Volker's got her and he's had her since last night.

He got her somewhere between my walking her to her car at _Trevor's _and Lisbon's place. Probably at the market as she mentioned needing to pick up a few things." Jane shook his head knowing she could have stopped at any of the four or five places between the restaurant and her apartment and she'd probably have stopped at the one she thought the least crowded

"Shit." Rigsby repeated Cho's eloquence deciding he really was an idiot not to have taken Jane at his word.

If he said Volker had Lisbon, the freak had Lisbon, and she wasn't answering that phone. He could tell by Van Pelt's expression.

It was as simple as that.

"We need to tell Bertram." Cho tossed out to no one in particular.

"We don't need to tell anyone anything yet." Jane corrected him. "Not until we check out Lisbon's place and those markets along the way."

"We need to tell somebody. Get out a BOLO as soon as possible." Rigsby said more forcefully. "If Volker's got Lisbon, we don't have a minute to spare."

"While that may be true, we can't let Volker know we're on to him until the last possible moment. He needs to believe he's got the upper hand. Let him verify what we already know." Jane knew his words went against every cop instinct the team had; but, they needed to play the game his way for Lisbon's sake.

"You can't be serious." Cho openly snorted at the whole idea.

"Cho, he's not going to kill Lisbon. Not any time soon." Jane refused to back down from the three hard glares aimed his way. "Hurt her, yes; kill, no."

"That's what we need to prevent." Van Pelt's tone was outraged. "We can't do that without going after them."

"That's exactly what we don't need to do." Jane held up his hand as Rigsby opened his mouth to protest. "Go after them and Lisbon's as good as dead.

Volker will cut his losses, kill her, and disappear. " Jane watched their faces as the team digested the starkness of his words. "He'll be living it up on some island somewhere siphoning off funds from accounts we know nothing about while Lisbon rots in the ground."

"We'll do it your way." Cho spoke for all of them after a few minutes of tense eye-ball dueling between the three.

It wasn't necessary for Jane to say anything in response. The sudden expulsion of the breath he'd not known he was holding was enough. He hadn't been sure the team would cooperate and he was beyond grateful they were.

"How do you know he won't kill her?" Van Pelt asked the question on the tip of everyone's tongue.

"I'm sure that's his final intent; but, that being said, Volker likes to play with his prey before putting them out of their misery." Jane watched the team's involuntary recoil at his words knowing they weren't going to like what he had to say. "We have time on our side for the moment. Volker feeds on fear and degradation. It makes him feel invincible.

Unfortunately, Lisbon showed him otherwise and he's going to make her pay."

"Damn it, Jane, you're saying it's torture Lisbon time." Rigsby hadn't expected those words to pass his lips when he'd bowed to Cho's silent alpha male eyeball bullying earlier. "That's why we need to go to Bertram and get a BOLO out."

"That's why we need to wait." Jane reminded him. "The most we need to do is check out the markets between the restaurant and Lisbon's place to see if they caught anything on video verifying my hypothesis. Once we know I'm right, we'll know where to go from there."

"How will we know that?" Cho asked.

"We should have our first communication by then." Jane answered quietly.

"What do you mean?" Van Pelt's curiosity was aroused. "You mean like Red John? He's going to hack into the computer system or something?"

"Nothing so devious." Jane held out his phone. "He's going to contact me…By video if I don't miss my guess."

"Why would he do that?" Rigsby asked.

"I openly challenged him from right over there on a quiet afternoon not so long ago." Jane pointed in the direction of his couch. "And I helped Lisbon bring him down."

"So, he's going to torture you as well." Cho said unnecessarily. "I don't like any of this."

"Neither do I; but, none of us asked to play his sick little game." Jane looked him in the eye. "We aren't being given a choice. That being said, I'd suggest we get a move on. The longer we dally, the longer it's going to be before we get that first video."

"You make it sound like Volker's watching us." Van Pelt shuddered at the repulsive thought.

"What do you think?" Jane let Grace draw her own conclusion and knew by her reaction that she was right. "We're wasting time when we shouldn't."

Tipping his head in the direction of the elevator, Cho motioned for the rest of the team to fall into line. Following Lisbon's agents, Jane stepped into the elevator watching the doors drift closed as he contemplated what he was going to do now that his worst nightmare was taking place. Beyond saving Lisbon, and making Volker pay, he hadn't a clue.

"How did Volker get her in the first place?" Rigsby asked no one in particular. "It isn't like the man could walk up to her in plain sight and put a gun to her head. He'd have been recognized and Lisbon would have put up a fight."

"How do you think?" Cho asked amazed at his fellow agent's obtuseness considering how good an agent Rigsby really was. "Someone she knew delivered her to him."

"Someone she knew from work." Van Pelt volunteered knowing it could be anyone from the SAC PD to the Feebs to Homeland Security. The potential suspects were endless unless they got a big break. "Someone Lisbon wouldn't think twice about walking into that parking lot with."

"You're right, Grace." Jane said as he stepped aside to allow the rest of the agents to lead the way out of the building. "That's why we better hope there's a video showing us precisely who that person is or Volker has more than just an upper hand."

"Rigsby, you and Van Pelt ride together. We'll meet up at _Trevor's_ and go from there." Cho didn't expect any resistance as he assumed Lisbon's role as Team Leader and he didn't get any. The Boss would expect nothing less. He'd already proven he was up for the job. All he had to do was take it. "Jane's coming with me."

Nothing else was said as the partners split up heading in different directions each with their mind on a case none of them cared to contemplate.


	2. Chapter 2

I've had my head in this chapter too long. Errors will eventually be corrected as I'm sure there are many I'm no longer seeing. ~Calla

###

Drifting in and out of consciousness, Lisbon cursed heartily at the troop of rodents tap dancing across her brain in sharp stilettos. Then she cussed again at the truly awful taste in her mouth. A taste that shouldn't be there…One that was faintly reminiscent of the swamp water masquerading as herbal tea Jane had tricked her into drinking to cure her last cold…She'd wanted to slap the hell out of him for that one. She still might…It had taken days to get over the nastiness.

The next thought trickling through her fuzzy brain was she shouldn't be feeling like this. Not dizzy and disoriented. Not in ways having nothing to do with terrified heart palpitations and overwhelming fear. She hadn't had _that _much to drink at the restaurant. One large Lager and umpteen cups of coffee did not equal a hangover from hell and a body feeling like overdone noodles…Something, other than the obvious, was terribly wrong and she didn't know what.

Instinctively backing into what she hoped was a velvet headboard behind her; Lisbon battled the overwhelming desire _not _to open her eyes to the unknown awaiting her. Resisting the urge to panic and doing just that, she gazed around her immediately noting she was in unfamiliar territory from the opulence of the room around her. Not only in unfamiliar territory…practically naked as well from the prickle of cold air against her chilled skin.

She was not going to think about that. Not about how she'd gotten all but naked and what might have been done to her in the getting there. She'd completely lose it if she did…Resisting the urge to look down and confirm what she already knew, Lisbon fought to make sense of the sensations flooding her mind. The last thing she truly recalled was putting her groceries in the trunk of her car.

That and the two goons she didn't know "helping" her into the passenger seat of her vehicle when she'd suddenly found herself unexpectedly leaning against her trunk trying to right her crazily tilting world.

Things had gotten a lot hazier after that. They still were…Hazy.

It didn't take the knowledge accompanying hte badge no longer on her hip to know why.

She'd been slipped something nasty somewhere between her first drink at the restaurant and that last coffee at the supermarket. A cup she'd shared with Brenda Shettrick who'd mysteriously shown up to buy a carton of milk about the time she'd been tearing open sugar packets. And one the other woman had had access to when she'd turned her back briefly to grab a buggy from a few feet away.

Or maybe there was nothing mysterious about it at all. Brenda lived a handful of blocks down the road. There was nothing extraordinary about the fact she'd make a ten p.m. grocery run to the corner market. Hadn't she been doing the same?

Lisbon admitted, for all she knew, she could have been doped hours earlier. Perhaps long before she left the CBI where plenty of people had access to her food and drink over an extended period of time. The when and where of it all depended on how strong the dose she'd been given and how fast acting the drug in her system.

Leaning back on her haunches, Lisbon breathed deeply a few times mastering the panic overwhelming her. She couldn't afford to fall to apart any time soon. She couldn't afford it at all. Giving in to her emotions would likely get her killed and she wasn't ready to die yet. It was far better to pretend she was calmer than she actually felt while taking careful inventory of her surroundings.

One thing was readily apparent: whoever was responsible for her predicament wasn't your Average Joe. The room surrounding her looked like something out of an old Hollywood movie. One of those '20's or '30's dramas with the filthy rich heroine acting out her soap opera life in her gilded mansion so popular back in the day though this likely wasn't a mansion. Well, maybe it was; but, it wasn't someone's mainstream home. Not from the woods she could see through the windows with the elegant, _imprisoning_ grates she could never escape through.

It was most likely a get-away "Cottage" from a by-gone era. Jane would know better than she. He seemed to know everything.

The other thing readily apparent was, not only wasn't she high tailing it out of one of those windows, she wasn't using anything in her pretty prison to ambush her captor either. There wasn't anything she could use. Surprisingly, the room was pretty Spartan considering her surroundings. Anything heavy enough to bash his brains in was carefully locked away in massive cabinets with glass too thick to ever break. Not with the only chair in the room. That mincey museum piece would shatter into a million splinters of gold tipped wood if she thought about using it for anything more strenuous than resting her regal bottom.

For the thousandth time in career, Lisbon decided there was a reason she hated cases involving wealthy people…especially cases involving her.

As for the drawers in the dresser or the bedside consoles, that might be a thought. Clambering off the bed she suddenly noted was nothing more than a bare mattress and headboard, Lisbon yanked on one of the drawers finding her suspicions were true. Even if she could manhandle one of those heavy drawers from its track, she could barely lift it. And even if she did, Lisbon suddenly realized she had other problems looking into the dresser mirror affixed to the wall across from her.

How the hell had she missed that? Too busy taking in other things she guessed.

Gazing at her reflection, Lisbon got confirmation that, yep, she was definitely in her underwear and in a compromised position considering there was some kind of funky collar encircling her neck. A collar she wasn't getting out of from the looks of the electronic lock binding it against her skin. And one prone to shocking her silly or something equally vile if she tried anything funny like prying it off or attacking anyone she shouldn't. She'd bet Jane's money on it. The only upside was the damned thing wasn't any more uncomfortable against her skin than a choker style necklace would be…just more of an unpleasant reminder of her growing sense of helplessness.

Looking around her fancy prison, Lisbon noted the cameras and knew her every move was being watched. Dropping her chin on her chest, she felt the last vestiges of hope she could save herself fading away. Turning the knob of the door exiting into the hall, she wasn't surprised by the futility of her actions. The door _was_ locked and she wasn't getting the key. Walking to the only other door in her room, she turned the knob and stepped into the kind of bathroom she'd expect to accompany the adjoining room. A bathroom clearly updated quite a few times in the last hundred years given the very modern toilet and massive sunken tub she would find in any one of those palatial estates they'd visited on cases over the years. It was also a bathroom without a lock on the door which she found unsettling.

Laughing eerily at the perverse nature her captivity, Lisbon walked back into her room and closed the door. As much as she didn't want to admit it, the creepy nature of her predicament pointed straight to a psycho like Volker. It couldn't be anyone else.

Jane had warned her quite eloquently at their dinner that things were nothing as they seemed…That the fat lady had yet to sing her swan song. It seemed he was right in stating until Volker was safely confined to solitary for the rest of his natural life what was done _wasn't _done. Not even if she and Bertram had convinced themselves otherwise.

She hadn't listened to him. Now, she was paying for it. Perhaps she'd have been smarter to skip the store and stick to fast food after all.

Restraining emotions spiraling out of control, Lisbon sat on the edge of the bed and rested her chin against her bent knee. As hard as it was to focus and as tired as she felt, she needed to figure this out and the only way she could do that was to ask a simple question: What would Jane do? It didn't take her long to decide. He'd sit back, breathe deeply, close his eyes, and go through the minutia of his day treating nothing as unimportant or insignificant no matter how ridiculous it seemed to everyone else.

Picturing herself awakening in her bed this morning, Lisbon allowed the details to flow through her consciousness.

She'd opened her eyes the same way she always did a good twenty minutes ahead of her alarm. She'd lain on her back a while longer than necessary going through her plans for the day before rolling out of bed and smacking her clock for good measure. She'd then ambled sticky eyed and drooley faced into the bathroom to climb under the hottest spray she could tolerate only to kill the shower at the first hint of cooling water. Drying off, she'd shoved her arms in her terry robe and bounced down the stairs to brew that much needed first cup the day.

Sitting at her kitchen counter sipping coffee, Lisbon had mocked herself for the very futile, very pleasant dream she'd had about Jane last night. That occasional senseless indulgence was nothing new. She'd been dreaming about her consultant off and on for years. What red blooded woman wouldn't? She only hoped he looked half as good in real life without that suit as he did in it. Not that she'd ever find out. Or that she seriously wanted to. Tangling intimately with Jane would take a braver woman than she. It was just sharing a pleasant dinner had stirred up steamy fantasies never meant to happen.

She'd also eaten that left over, mostly stale Danish she'd swiped from the CBI a couple of days ago for breakfast as she was out of everything else and didn't want leftover pizza the second morning in a row. Simple things like grocery shopping had fallen by the wayside as tracking Volker was more important. Fortunately, she had just enough milk and sugar in the cupboard for her coffee and one last roll of toilet paper.

Dissecting at her morning, Lisbon decided there was nothing special there. Unless she was missing something which was highly possible as she wasn't hitting on all cylinders.

What she did know was she'd done her makeup and hair as usual. Brushed and flossed and used the last of her mouthwash. That was one thing she wasn't doing…going to the office with stinky breath. It was the same old same old unless you counted changing her suit twice, no three times, before settling on the one she'd eventually worn. She'd also packed a fresh blouse, dress pumps, and the brighter makeup she'd need to go from day to night as she wasn't swinging by her place before meeting Jane. The restaurant was in the opposite direction. Again, there was nothing unusual about her actions. She'd done the same thing a hundred times before when meeting friends after work.

She'd then run by Bertram's office on the way in as she'd been instructed by her Boss and literally bumped into Brenda Shettrick in the hall. After making her apologies, she'd gotten the third degree over her unusually dressy suit for her trouble. She'd ended up admitting she was meeting Jane at _Trevor's_ to celebrate Volker's incarceration after work if everything went according to plans. _That_ might be significant with hindsight. The woman _had_ been on LaRoche's infamous list. The same list getting all of them into so much trouble before Jane was done.

Their head of Media Relations hadn't been willing to accept the arraignment as adequate justification for Lisbon's atypical attire which was why she'd had to admit there was more to her choice of suit in the first place. She hadn't wanted to share her dinner plans with anyone least of all Miss Nosey Posey and she'd made it perfectly clear it _wasn't_ a date. That Jane liked nice places gave her a reason to wear a suit she never got to wear and nothing more. End of story. She hadn't liked the vulture like gleam in Shettrick's beady eyes as though she'd suddenly learned something worth sharing with the world. Lisbon could still hear the curses she muttered under her breath reverberating in her head at that unsettling realization.

The last thing she'd needed was getting the rumor mill flapping in that direction again. She'd have hell to pay. As if there wasn't enough gossip about her and Jane already without adding fuel to the flame.

If that wasn't bad enough, she'd run into Brenda yet again in passing at the end of her day.

She'd finally made it to the CBI and her office a half hour later than she'd wanted to where she'd buried her head in a file until it was time to leave for the most surreal arraignment she'd ever had the agony of sitting through. Volker looked for the world like he had nothing to fear. Like he knew things she didn't. If her suspicions played out, maybe he had, and she should have taken his attitude as a sign of things to come.

The creeper had shot her enough _interesting_ looks throughout the proceeding to make her skin crawl…Certainly enough to provoke Jane to action had she allowed him to attend which she hadn't. It was going to be hard enough to make the charges stick without her consultant's shenanigans. It didn't help the judge wasn't overly fond of her mentalist having already been subjected to his peculiar brand of charm a number of times over the years.

On second thought, she might have been wiser to have taken him along. Maybe Volker would have stopped shooting her looks clearly conveying he was imagining her naked doing all of the wicked, wicked things he'd like to do with her. Things he would obviously enjoy and she wouldn't. As if she'd do _anything_ with him much less what he was imagining. It had taken all of her concentration no to squirm in her seat. Not in a good way.

She'd wanted to flee the proceedings; but, she hadn't. She was an Officer of the Law and she didn't back down. That wouldn't look good. The situation wasn't helped by the knowledge no one else was seeing the looks Volker shot her way or the accompanying, subtly threatening gestures meant for her eyes only. The bastard was sneaky that way. What she wouldn't have given for her Glock about then. She might have used it on him.

Suddenly exhausted by all the mental meandering, Lisbon rolled on her side on the mattress. All the thinking she'd been doing the last few minutes was making her head hurt and the room spin dizzily. She really wasn't feeling all that clear at the moment and her stomach was churning unpleasantly. The initial adrenaline dump she'd gotten upon opening her eyes to a strange, new place must have worn off…Or maybe the shock of the last few hours was finally catching up with her…Or maybe that drug was still running riot though her system….

And, maybe, just maybe, if she closed her eyes for a while things would be better when she opened them again….

###

"You still think Volker's got her?" Cho's voice rent the silence of the SUV.

"What do you think?" Jane returned the question with a question. "Whoever he had following Lisbon probably overheard her saying she was stopping by the market on the way home when I walked her to her car. It wouldn't be that hard to follow and snatch one petite woman if there were two of them." Volker's henchmen had a habit of working in pairs like the cowards they were. "Or even if there was only one of them if he was strong enough. Not when she didn't know she was being following."

"If Volker has Lisbon, what do you think he's doing to the Boss?" Cho asked the question Jane didn't want to answer.

"Not what you think." Jane continued staring out the window lost in thought. "Not any time soon."

"But you think he will." Cho pressed refusing to say the actual words bouncing around in both their heads.

"If we don't find her and stop him?" Jane studied Cho's profile realizing what his line of questioning was costing the Agent. "Yes, that's exactly what I think."

Knuckles whitening on the steering wheel, the Korean Agent continued in the line of questioning he'd just begun.

"You think he'll kill her." Cho turned left into the supermarket parking lot and pulled into a space before killing the engine.

"No, Cho, I don't." Jane corrected him. "I think he'll leave her very much alive, but very broken. Lisbon won't recover from what he'll do to her if we don't find her first."

Neither would he.

But, he didn't need to voice that sentiment.

Saving Lisbon was all that truly mattered to either of them.

###

"Teresa, I see you've finally decided to join me."

Lisbon's head snapped up hearing that oily voice playing so prominently in her vilest moments the past few weeks. Fighting the desire to recoil, she stared defiantly into the eyes of her worse nightmare. Volker would never know how much it cost her to put forth such an insolent front.

Or maybe he already did given that husky laugh causing goose bumps to litter her skin.

"Where am I?" Lisbon's voice sounded raspy to her ears and not nearly as demanding as she'd hoped.

The rawness of her throat had something to do with whatever _whoever_ had put in her coffee. And that whoever was still a big question mark. While it was far more likely she'd been drugged at _Trevor's_ somewhere between the kitchen and their table, it wasn't impossible it had happened at the supermarket.

She had left that final cup of coffee she'd had to have sitting on the counter unsupervised for however long it had taken her to walk a couple of feet away to grab a buggy. She hadn't thought anything of it as there hadn't been anyone but Brenda around at the time. She was still having a hard time wrapping her mind around the possibility someone she'd worked with so long would do something like that. She certainly hoped she couldn't; but, she honestly didn't know. What she did know was that was the last time she was snagging one of those free cups of coffee the supermarkets were so fond of offering. Not going to happen again.

If she'd been slipped the drug at the supermarket and not at Trevor's, Brenda had used a dangerously potent, fast acting drug which would explain why she still felt the way she did. That was the only explanation for the sudden haziness she'd experienced about the time those two well dressed goons appeared at her side. Goons making it appear by their actions they'd met her there by prior arrangement. That she was willingly sliding into her passenger seat when she wasn't. She wouldn't have under any circumstances.

She didn't know either of them.

Anyone looking at that video feed would think it was her husband or boyfriend meeting up with her after work to ride home together. That was exactly how it had looked from the light kiss on her lips to the seemingly affectionate hand at the small of her back forcing her into the car as she hadn't had the strength to resist. That the second man she'd never seen in her life had then driven away in the opposite direction once she was safely seat belted inside gave credence to the story they were trying to sell.

Lisbon wanted to kick herself for not putting up a fight or doing all of the things she'd known to do. Unfortunately, she'd been seeing quadruple at the time and her brain was muzzy. She wasn't in any shape for a fight if she'd had control of her body. She must have lost consciousness soon after they'd pulled out of the parking lot.

The next thing she'd known, she was waking up here…wherever here was…in the midst of a lunatic's fantasy.

"Seeing as you checked everything out earlier, I should think you would know. You're in a bedroom." She'd expected some variation of that smart-mouthed response.

"Where am I?" Lisbon asked again knowing any clue she could get on video would help.

"My great grandfather's hunting lodge if you can call a place like this a hunting lodge…I see you weren't expecting me to tell you that much. It doesn't matter. Mr. Jane and your team will never find us as we're a number of hours from Sacramento and the existence of this place isn't well documented.

However, I do think that's all I'm going to say as things tend to go awry when your consultant sticks his nose into matters that are none of his business." Volker tented his fingers and pursed his lips as though lost in contemplation.

He was probably contemplating all the nasty ways he wanted to get back at Jane. Unfortunately, Lisbon guessed, most of them involved hurting her.

"Leave Jane out of it." She said without thinking.

"I don't think I can do that as I'm sure your lover is already deeply involved." Volker turned his attention back to Lisbon.

"We're not lovers." Lisbon snapped wanting to clasp her hands over her mouth for betraying information better left unsaid.

"You could have fooled me." Volker said as he unfolded his length from the gilded chair she'd been studying earlier. "Your Mr. Jane doesn't abandon his search for Red John for just anyone as he frequently does for you. And he certainly wouldn't take just any woman to his favorite watering hole and spend the evening showering her with attention and compliments. That's very revealing don't you think?"

Lisbon sent a mental "Damn it, Jane." her mentalist's way. She should never have gone to him for help…But, if she hadn't, they'd never have caught Volker in the first place…Then again, if she hadn't, she might not be in the predicament she was now.

Lisbon knew that wasn't true. The freak would have come after her anyway. She'd dared stand up to him, more than once, and that was something he would never allow to go unpunished.

"And you wouldn't wear something like this for dinner with just any man." Volker pressed his fingers into her skin as he ran his fingers down the thin strap of her bow laden indigo lace bra from her shoulder to the swell of her breast feeding off the fear Lisbon was fighting so valiantly to hide.

Refusing to flinch from his touch, she kept her gaze steady as she slowed her breathing. There wasn't much she could do about her dilated pupils, nervous ticks, or shaky palms except hope against hope he didn't notice. But, she wasn't giving Volker the satisfaction of overtly showing how terrified she was of that hand cupping her breast so inappropriately _under_ her bra or of the fingers stroking the line of her back much too intimately considering who he was.

She could only thank God he'd not yet done anything more from the feel of certain parts of her body and that she'd not worn her first choice of lingerie as she'd ultimately found revealing full lace demi cups and the skimpier lace string bikini too racy for work.

Contrary to Volker's assumptions neither her date with Jane, nor her secret fantasies, had influenced her attire in the least.

Well, maybe it had played into choosing the cobalt blouse. She'd not wanted to wear the same top she'd worn all day and she'd wanted to look especially nice. Lisbon refused to contemplate why that might have been. Regardless of any subconscious motives, dinner at _Trevor's_ had been the perfect excuse to debut the expensive blouse Van Pelt had talked her into buying. That the rhinestone buttons matched the ones on her dress suit only made her selection that much easier. But, that was as far as it went.

She'd known she had a tough day ahead of her with Volker's Arraignment without adding Bertram's debriefing to the mix and she'd needed to look pretty.

What could she say? She was enough of a woman that knowing she looked feminine beneath her austere exterior got her through a lot of unpleasant moments much easier than she would get through them otherwise. Now, giving into her feminine urges was blowing up in her face. She hadn't seen that one coming.

At least she'd had enough sense to wear the bra with the double layered bottom cups modestly covering all but the swell of her breasts still much too tantalizingly revealed by the lacey top cup. Or the voyeuristic bastard with his hand playing over her ass so revoltingly seemed to think so from the look in his eyes and the heavy breathing in her ear. Feeling her captor rubbing so intimately against her clearly mimicking his intent, Lisbon refused to shatter in terror as he wanted her to. She wouldn't give him the satisfaction of watching her come undone.

Closing her eyes against the malicious glint in Volker's eyes, Lisbon sent up a silent prayer of thanks, that like her bra, her mostly lace shortys still shielded her most intimate parts with a miniscule swathe of cobalt silk.

She didn't think she could hold it together if Volker was seeing, as well as feeling, _everything._

She didn't think Jane could either as she knew he was watching this.


	3. Chapter 3

A/N: Thank you guests, Tamtam, and Tina for the reviews I can't reply to personally. They're greatly appreciated.

The errors will be fixed in this chapter tonight after work. I'm posting the thing before I lose my nerve. ~Calla

###

Bypassing the rest of the team already secluded in Lisbon's office under lock and key studying the video feed from the supermarket for any clues they may have missed, Jane made his way to his desk and opened the locked side drawer. He wouldn't be joining the party. He didn't need to see Brenda Shettrick meeting up with his "Boss" at the market again. Or dissect her suspicious actions behind her co-worker's back while Lisbon was fetching her buggy from a few feet away.

He would have plenty of time to break the woman once he had a better handle on things.

Lisbon wasn't around to intervene and hypnosis was a wonderful thing. Jane smiled evilly at the unbidden thought he'd know everything the redhead knew in a handful of minutes. And he'd know instantly if the situation was, or wasn't, as it seemed.

Giving her the benefit of the doubt, Jane decided maybe the meeting _was_ nothing more than coincidence. Brenda lived a scant couple of blocks away so making a late night milk run wasn't as improbable as it seemed at first glance and Lisbon wasn't using her usual market. Under the circumstances, it wasn't all that unbelievable their visits just _happened_ to coincide.

Adding insult to injury, the recording was still grainier than it should be. Even after Van Pelt's skillful doctoring. Jane didn't need to see that footage for the thousandth time to admit the jury was still out on Shettrick's hands on involvement in Lisbon's disappearance. He would say, however, that there was enough circumstantial evidence not to exclude her from the suspect list.

Nope, he didn't need to see any of that meaningless garbage again.

What he did need to see was Lisbon and her car being snatched and that wasn't on any video anywhere as the store didn't have cameras in their parking lot.

Locking himself away in his "Murder Room," the one only Lisbon knew he had, Jane removed the thin tablet from the large envelope left on his desk earlier in the day. An envelope he'd sent to Forensics long ago knowing it would yield nothing of consequence. Their perp wasn't stupid enough to leave any fingerprints, hair, or saliva behind. No physical evidence betraying his identity. Jane was sure of that.

Not if he was Tommy Volker.

Walking over to sit at his makeshift desk, Jane settled in his chair and turned the pad on. Following the carefully penned instructions on the accompanying note, he watched the newest window rapidly expand and knew what would soon be flooding the screen.

Nothing he wanted to see….

Watching the video stream to life, Jane's brow rose realizing he was viewing events Lisbon would hopefully never see.

Looking at the opulent chamber filling the screen, he cataloged detail after detail in his Memory Palace realizing immediately that Tommy had planned his revenge well. Jane had no reservations he'd see Volker's attractive face long before his viewing pleasure ended.

Turning his attention back to the screen, Jane noted the windows were barred with intricately crafted grill work Lisbon would never get past without specialized power tools she didn't have. He noticed as well that anything that could possibly be used as a weapon was carefully locked away in unreachable places. The lone chair in the room was probably bolted to the floor in some invisible manner and the heavier pieces of furniture were immovable for someone of Lisbon's size and strength. Not that that chair would do that much damage in the first place. Knock him silly for a moment or two perhaps; but, that would only make a dangerous animal more dangerous. And Volker was nothing if not a dangerous animal.

From what he could see, Lisbon was helplessly trapped in a pretty prison surrounded by a multitude of viable means of escape.

And she was hopelessly unable to access a single one.

He had to hand it to the man...

Thomas Volker was one sick puppy in more ways than he wanted to count.

Shaking his unsettling thoughts, Jane turned his attention back to the screen in time to note Volker striding confidently across the screen carrying a familiar burden. While somewhat surprised to see the man engaged in "manual" labor, he wasn't shocked watching him dump Lisbon rather unceremoniously on the bare mattress of the elegant bed. Nor was he all that surprised when the deceptively handsome face turned to stare knowingly into the camera.

"Ah, Mr. Jane, I'm sure you've found my gift by now. And, if I don't miss my guess, you're probably holed up in some dingy hole in the CBI with your face pressed against the screen like the shadow loving ghoul that you are." Volker's gaze pierced him through the screen as though he knew the thoughts flicking through Jane's mind.

"You're finding yourself repelled, yet drawn, to all of this." Volker continued dragging his finger's over Lisbon's pale cheek in a sensual manner causing Jane's hands to involuntarily fist. "You know you shouldn't watch; but, you can't pull your eyes away. Your curiosity to see what you've never seen won't let you. What you've lusted after all of these years."

Jane mentally corrected Volker in his lurid assumptions. Perhaps he'd had a fantasy or two over the past decade or so. Maybe a whole lot more. He couldn't deny that reality. He was a very normal man, in spite of the rumors to the contrary, with very normal desires. Lisbon was a vibrant, attractive woman. They spent a lot of time together. Perhaps he _had_ wanted to bare her gentle curves to his appreciative gaze over the years. Perhaps he _had_ delighted in imaginings of running hands, lips, and tongue over her satiny skin in so many pleasurable ways mapping every sensual dip and curve. Perhaps he'd indelicately imagined being intimately sheathed within her eliciting unspeakable sounds from the woman beneath him conveying with his body the words he wasn't yet willing to say in any overt way.

But, he'd never _lusted_ after his savior in such a _filthy_ way.

He'd desired _possessing_ every priceless part of her instead…as he would one day. His Lisbon was a very giving woman.

"There's that and your need to confirm you're as right as you usually are. That it is indeed _me_ claiming your precious Lisbon." Turning way, Volker turned his attention to the unresponsive woman on the bed.

Watching the man's actions as he was drawn from his ponderings by the oily voice surrounding him, Jane resisted the urge to toss the tablet in his hands across the room. He couldn't afford to give his emotions free reign or all was lost. Feeling the blood drain from his face, he knew it wouldn't be long before he felt the white hot flush of anger again.

Volker was trying to push his buttons. To make him lose it in a way he never had...not in recent years. He'd faked it a time or two; but, that wasn't the same. The hell of it was the maniac was doing a very good job and he'd yet to do very much at all. Turning his attention back to the cocky voice saturating the video, Jane watched his nemesis run his hand over Lisbon's other cheek and felt his fists curl reflexively yet again.

"She's quite the attractive little thing don't you think?" Jane watched Volker's fingers combing through Lisbon's unbound hair and took a deep, fortifying breath.

He knew what anyone watching him watching Volker molesting Lisbon at her most vulnerable was seeing: the clenched jaw, the dilated pupils, the jagged breaths forced through his nose. So much for the hard won illusion of calm. It was shattered by that first sadistic touch.

He was already clearly on the verge of losing it.

"Of course you do. You wouldn't be so protective if you didn't…I wonder if your colleagues know how you look at your Boss when you think no one else is looking?..Somehow, I don't think they do. They think you're still too wrapped up in Angela."

Jane resisted the urge to react violently to Volker for daring to mention his dead wife's name.

"But they're wrong aren't they? I can only imagine the thoughts going through your mind as you watch me doing this." Reaching down, Volker unbuttoned Lisbon's jacket and slid it slowly over her arms like a lover would. "I'm sure your eyes are narrowing and your palms are itching that I'd dare touch your Lisbon this way…As you already know, _Mr._ Jane, I fully intend to do far more than _touching_ before I'm done."

Watching black pants sliding down shapely legs, Jane knew he should look away. But, he couldn't for more than prurient reasons. He had to know Volker's every move from the way his eyes lecherously caressed every gentle curve to the hand so appreciatively caressing well toned muscles. Resisting the urge to throw the pad in his hands, Jane cursed vividly at his impotence. A monster was assaulting Lisbon before his eyes and he was powerless to stop him… _His_ Lisbon not Volker's.

Jane didn't stop to wonder when she'd become _his _anymore than he wondered when he'd become_ hers. _They simply were. They had been for a while and they both knew it. It didn't matter that neither of them openly acknowledged it.

"Very nice, don't you agree, Mr. Jane. I knew she'd been working out." Volker continued conversationally as he tossed Lisbon's blouse onto the chair with the rest of her clothes exposing far more of her pale form than he had a right to see. "Petite, but nicely shaped, wouldn't you say? Yes, I'm sure you would." Volker ran his hands over her arms causing Lisbon to subconsciously pull away.

Even unconscious she didn't want him touching her.

Hearing Volker's amused chuckle, Jane felt his ire rising.

If only he could get his hands on the him.

Volker would be a dead man.

"As satisfying as I'm finding all of this, I think we'll both enjoy this more when Agent Lisbon is finally awake." Volker leaned over to place a kiss against Lisbon's parted lips before reaching into his pocket. "One last thing before I go, there are a couple of things you need know." Volker held up the innocuous looking black band he pulled from his pocket before fastening it around Lisbon's neck. "This looks harmless enough; but it isn't. It's a nifty little devise one of my companies developed for a foreign power wanting to keep political prisoners in hand. I won't say which one as that's on a need to know basis. I will say it's a pretty nasty piece of work.

If Lisbon tries to remove it she'll get a painful shock. If she fights me, she'll get more of the same. If she tries to leave this room what do you think? If she makes it to the end of the hall all bets are off. She'll be dead before she gets out the door. The truly amusing part is she doesn't know any of this and she won't. But you do." Volker laughed at his words. "Oh, and if any of you try to remove the collar without the pass code or the key, well, I suppose you'll find out what happens if it comes to that.

Mr. Jane, as much as I've enjoyed our conversation, I need to move on to other things." Volker rose to his feet. "I'm sure we'll talk again soon."

Jane cursed as the screen faded to gray.

###

"Where's Jane?" Cho walked into the bullpen and glanced at the empty couch.

The team had exited Lisbon's office for a coffee break a while ago. As self-appointed Team Leader in Lisbon's absence, he found it vaguely disturbing Jane was nowhere to be found. Especially since it was at his insistence that none of the higher ups had been notified of anything except Lisbon was mysteriously running late. That was all going to change soon as they were all now positive their Boss had been taken against her will. Jane's personal feelings aside.

"Where do you think?" Van Pelt halted mid type. "He's up in that room in the attic he thinks we don't know anything about. Probably watching whatever's on that tablet over and over again."

She didn't need to add and slowly losing his mind as they already knew…maybe for real this time.

"Why won't Jane let us see whatever's on that damned pad he's so secretive about?" Rigsby was obviously frustrated. "He's got to be suppressing evidence."

"He's probably keeping us from seeing what he thinks the Boss wouldn't want us to see. " Van Pelt gave voice to their darkest fears.

If Volker had her, whatever was on that tablet wasn't going to pretty.

"That's bad isn't it?" Rigsby asked as though it was the first time the thought had crossed his mind.

"Yeah, it's bad." Cho said what none of them wanted to admit. "I'm going up to see Jane."

###

Jane's jaw tightened perceptively as fresh video streamed across the tablet in his hands. He'd been replaying the images in his head for the past few hours searching for anything that might give them a clue to Volker's hiding place. Or he'd been trying.

Mostly, he'd been meeting with Bertram and the like taking responsibility for the team not apprising them of their suspicions Lisbon was missing earlier. He'd also been convincingly making a case for keeping her kidnapping on the down low. Fortunately, he'd been persuasive enough in his points.

As far as her co-workers knew, Lisbon was called away to deal with an unexpected family emergency.

As for the team, as they were the most familiar with everything to do with this unpleasant situation, they were working the case under Cho's leadership with Jane's welcome guidance under Bertram's watchful eye for the time being. As long as their actions didn't negatively impact the CBI, and stood a chance of getting Lisbon safely returned to their ranks, he was willing to let their consultant play his mind games. At the first sign of things blowing up in their face, he was pulling the plug. One agent was a small price to pay to preserve the integrity of the CBI…even if the agent in question was the much beloved Lisbon of the Serious Crimes Unit.

Jane recoiled slightly watching Volker enter the room and sit on the bed beside Lisbon. He watched him pull her close. Seeing the look in her eyes, Jane knew she was weighing the wisdom of jerking free and deciding against it. Volker was too much of an unknown quantity as was that piece of electronics around her neck. While Lisbon knew his brutal tendencies much too well, she didn't know if that collar was meant to zap her into next week or something far worse. The threat wasn't yet worth the risk. Not until she had more intel.

Catching an expression in her eyes bordering on apology, Jane longed to reassure Lisbon she had nothing to be sorry for. He certainly didn't blame her for responding passively to Volker's provocations. She needed to do everything in her power to protect herself for as long as she could. Things would get violent soon enough. It would take time to find her and Lisbon had to buy that for them…even if that meant enduring Volker's tongue against her skin.

Lisbon was strong. She could handle this. She didn't have a choice.

Gut clenching; Jane caught the lone tear coursing down Lisbon's cheek at the vile words Volker whispered in her ear as his fingers edged over her thigh disappearing beneath the seam of her panties. The arm resting across her chest and the hand brutally cupping her shoulder ensured she couldn't pull away. Jane didn't have to see the sharp jerk of her body or the horror in her eyes to know what was happening. To know Lisbon was being intimately violated. And that she wasn't a willing participate.

Jane's gasped at the clenching of his gut as he watched Volker's fingers thrusting where they were never meant to go.

###

Having gotten nothing from Jane of any importance on his earlier visit, Cho steeled himself for his second and lifted his hand. Well, he'd gotten nothing other than confirmation Volker was behind Lisbon's disappearance, permission to notify Bertram and the higher ups, and a glance into the infamous "Murder Room" no one had supposedly seen though he suspected a certain familiar brunette had.

Okay, maybe he'd gotten something.

But, he needed more.

Forcefully rapping on the door, Cho didn't expect it to immediately open any more than it had the first time. He certainly didn't expect entrance into Jane's hallowed shrine. He wasn't sure even Lisbon had had that privilege though it wouldn't surprise him is she had. There had always been something peculiar between her and Jane. A strange kind of bond transcending everything…Vegas included. If Cho didn't know better, he'd think they were more than friends…way more.

But, they weren't. Everyone knew that. Even the gossiping fools making asinine bets around the water cooler.

Rapping against metal, Cho allowed his thoughts to roll over his morning so far. Not for the first time, he'd been impressed with how Jane had handled Bertram and "friends" in the closed door meeting they'd had in Lisbon's office earlier in the day. He'd made his case eloquently and won every point without much of a fight.

Of all of them, he was best qualified to handle Volker. That was never in question. His methods were another matter. In the end, it was decided to leave things as they were with Cho the Lead Agent and Jane doing what he did best…trapping the monster under the bed. All he really cared about was the team was still in charge of the case and Bertram was letting them handle it as they felt best. At least for the moment and that was a good thing. All Cho had to do was report to Bertram on a regular basis and he could do that…Whether Jane liked it or not.

Speaking of Jane, the team was growing mildly concerned which was why he was banging on his door in the first place. They hadn't seen Jane since he'd stormed from Lisbon's office several hours ago refusing to surrender his only connection to their boss. Whatever he was seeing was meant for his eyes only. The team hadn't agreed and accused him of withholding evidence. Or Rigsby had. Things had gone downhill from there.

Now, three hours later, Cho had come to persuade and threaten Jane into honoring his word. Into sharing anything and everything pertinent to the investigation he had at hand. Including sanitized clips of the videos Volker was sending over on a regular basis. Jane had promised Bertram he'd do that much.

Now, one p.o.'d Korean Agent fully intended to see that he honored his word.

"About damn time." Cho said as the door cracked and half of Jane's face appeared.

"You alone?" Jane asked.

"Yeah, Rigsby's getting lunch and Van Pelt's on the computer digging through public records." Jane had suggested delving into all of the Volker family and business holdings as a viable place to start and Van Pelt had embraced the idea with surprising gusto.

Cho suspected she'd do anything to keep her mind off what was happening to Lisbon. He didn't blame her. Unlike the rest of them, Grace could feel like she was doing something useful and she probably was. Maybe she'd find something valuable in the end.

"Good." Jane opened the door wide enough to permit the other man egress; but, barely.

He wasn't about the let the wrong eyes get a gander at his lair.

Watching Jane bolt the door, Cho took a look around the dingy room noting the covered walls. He didn't want to know how their consultant had gotten his hands on half the stuff in here. Repressing a shudder as he absorbed the ambiance, Cho wondered how Jane maintained his sanity spending hour after hour in a place like this immersed in his obsession. He came to the conclusion he didn't. Their Mentalist was totally insane; but, in a good way for them. Shaking his head in denial, the Korean Agent resisted blurting this was the creepiest Bat Cave he'd ever seen with all the stick penned maps and bloody photographs hanging everywhere.

God help him. This crap was off the Richter even for Jane.

If he'd thought Jane's sanity had slipped the Reservation a time or two in the past, he knew it now. The man was fruit-cake-heavy-on-the-booze nutty and Red John had started it all. Losing Lisbon was going to finish the job. Or, maybe it was more accurate to say, extreme trauma had brought the cracks to the surface. Cho had a feeling he'd always been slightly off.

Jane couldn't have those "super powers" and not be. The really creepy, skin crawling ones making one think the man doth protest too much. That perhaps psychics of one kind or another really did exit. And maybe there was one in their midst.

"I need to see what's on that thing." Cho cut to the chase.

"Really?" Jane quirked a brow at him not surprised at the full frontal attack. Kimball Cho was known for being blunt. "You really want to see what's on this thing?"

"Yeah, I do." Cho spoke with more conviction than he felt.

"Make yourself at home." Jane handed the tablet over not at all surprised at the shocked words suddenly tumbling from the stoic Agent's lips.

Jane listened to the stream of profanity spewing from Cho in a way he'd never heard. Lisbon wouldn't approve of her Number One taking the Lord's name in vain in quite so many creative ways. No matter how upset he was. She'd wash his mouth out with soap and say a whole slew of Hail Mary's or something to that affect.

"Tone it down, Cho." Jane quietly took his attention from the rectangle in his hands. "Lisbon wouldn't approve. I don't think her God would either and right now we really need Him on our side. Volker certainly has Hell on his."

Or he would have if Jane believed in Hell. As it was, a few events over the past couple of years had convinced him that maybe, just maybe, Lisbon wasn't a total sap for her beliefs. Something had kept her alive when she shouldn't be more than once. If that had something to do with that Higher Power she kept praying to, then he was grateful to Him.

"Here." Cho handed him the tablet resisting the urge to bounce it off the wall. "I think I've seen all I need to see."

"Is that so?" Jane's sarcastic bark of laughter wasn't pleasant to either of their ears.

"Yeah." Cho agreed. "Let me know when you get any more."

"I'll let you know; but, you're not seeing them…any of you." Jane's tone was firm. "They won't get any better."

He didn't need to say they'd only get worse.

"Just let me know if you see anything that will help the case." Cho didn't push the point. "I gotta go."

"I suppose you do." Jane watched Cho's every move as he prepared himself to go back downstairs. It wasn't as easy to get his poker face in place after all he'd seen. "Cho?"

"Yeah?" He didn't like the look in Jane's eyes.

"You're a dead man if you ever tell Lisbon what you've seen." Jane said quietly knowing Lisbon would never recover if she learned what he'd just done.

It had to be bad enough knowing _he_ was seeing her torment. Knowing Cho had seen it as well would devastate her and potentially ruin the good thing they had going. He wouldn't allow that to happen.

"I won't." Cho didn't even want to tell himself he'd seen what he was seeing.

No wonder Jane was such a train wreck.

He had every right to be.

###

Watching Lisbon throwing a towel over what had to be a very visible camera panning the room, Jane knew she was clueless there was another hidden camera taping her every move. He wouldn't be getting this newest feed if there wasn't. And Volker wouldn't risk her doing anything he couldn't see and getting the upper hand. Even in such a personal setting.

He'd learned firsthand how resourceful one tiny woman could be.

Watching her sink to the tiled floor, Jane wasn't surprised to watch Lisbon come undone. To hear the jagged sounds torn from her throat he'd never wanted to hear. She was a strong woman. Far too strong for her own good; but, even a strong woman had her breaking point. And being defiled in such a intimate manner by a vicious murderer was a good one.

"Damn it, Jane, I'm sorry." He couldn't believe the words he was hearing.

Even after all she'd been through, when she didn't think he could see or hear her, Lisbon was thinking of him.

"Shush, Lisbon, you have nothing to be sorry about." Jane placed his palm on the screen unconsciously reassuring her everything would be alright. "I'm not the one he's touching."

While that might be true, he'd still felt everything Lisbon was going through.

He'd felt her horror and disgust as Volker ravaged her so intimately seeking to coax a sexual response from her unwilling body. Lisbon had valiantly resisted giving him the satisfaction. Given her feelings for the man, her contempt had boiled to the surface easily. She'd been outraged at Volker's defiling touch. That he'd molested her in such a manner and thought he'd get away with it. If looks could kill, Volker would have been done.

But, he wasn't, and he'd only do it again. They both knew it. Both Lisbon and Jane.

And she would fight him as long as she could.

Until that day came that Jane dreaded.

He knew what Lisbon's team didn't...Thomas Volker was a masterful sexual sadist and he'd only just begun. And Lisbon was going to eventually weaken as anyone would. She was only human.

When she did, Volker would get that response he wanted. It wouldn't matter that her mind felt differently or that it was only a physiological response to skillful manipulation, Lisbon would be devastated. In a way from which she wouldn't easily recover. Jane knew that if Lisbon didn't. It would be the first real chink in her resolve and one Volker would exploit mercilessly. There wouldn't be anything Jane could do to stop him.

And they weren't going to find her before that happened.

He was sure of it.

Volker wouldn't make it that easy for them.

It wasn't his style.

Seeing Lisbon pick herself up off the floor, the noble part of him wanted to look away; but, the Mentalist in him knew he couldn't. He had to see if she had any injuries he'd yet to see. If Volker had done anything more than the torture he'd been privy to.

Watching her reach behind her back to unfasten what would really be a lovely bra under different circumstances, Jane decided Lisbon really was a beautiful woman. Perhaps not in that in-your- face way that Angela was; but, definitely a beauty in her unique way. Lithe and petite, strong and shapely with curves that fit her size, he'd always found her appealing. That appeal had grown as he'd gotten to know her.

Tearing his gaze from her nude form, Jane knew in a different time and place, if they were together in such a way, that he'd give into her spicy scent and the lure of body. He knew she'd give into the lure of his. It was something to look forward to.

Once they got past all of this.

Watching her step into the shower, he didn't have to watch her actions to know Lisbon was trying to scrub Volker's touch and scent from her skin. He'd be doing the same. Losing count of exactly how long she was in there, Jane watched her eventually emerge to dry herself and slide back into her underwear. Hugging herself and longing to scrub the skin from her body again, Lisbon looked straight into the camera she couldn't see as though sensing it's presence with wide green eyes and steeled her back before speaking directly to him.

"Jane, I know you can't see me but I have to say this." Lisbon's gaze didn't waver. "You better hold it together and get this bastard…I will so kick your ass if you don't...No matter what happens to me." She wiped her hand over her face as though magicking away the suspicious moisture he saw in her eyes. "And…and, I think we need to talk when I get back…I really do... and I think you know about what."

Watching her slide down the wall to land in an ungainly pile of towel and soft, bared skin, Jane watched Lisbon dissolve giving into the tears she could no longer hidef.

"Yes, Teresa, I think we do." Jane said aloud knowing she couldn't hear his affirmative response.

Watching the film suddenly fade to black Jane did the one thing he'd wanted to do since his first glimpse of Volker dropping Lisbon so unceremoniously on that bed.

He lifted his arm and hurled the offending rectangle into the nearest brick wall hearing the satisfying thud of plastic shattering into a million jagged shards. As much as he wished that was the end of the story, nothing was farther from the truth. He wasn't escaping his fate so easily any more than Lisbon was.

He had little doubt he'd receive a second package before the end of the business day.

He was counting on it.


	4. AN 2

**Please Read:**

After receiving a couple of reviews, I need to respectfully remind my readers:

1 - This is a DARK FIC - it will be disturbing in places.

2 - This is NOT a RAPE fic. There will be NO rape of Lisbon or anyone else in this piece. Intimating of unpleasant activities, yes; the actual event NO.

3 - It will likely not get any more graphic than Chapter Three.

4 - Jane WILL rescue Lisbon in time as my readers hopefully know by now that I DO NOT write unhappy endings.

Though unpublished as of this time, I am a novelist in the real world who enjoys posting rough drafts of Mentalist fanfic when I'm not trying to get my books edited for submission. I write romantic suspense and historical romances that include violence, warfare, and real life. I try to bring some of that into my stories.

That being said, I don't only write cute stories. While I enjoy writing fluffy pieces, I also enjoy challenging myself to tackle tough subjects respectfully while still eliciting an emotional response from my readers. I'm seeking to grow as a writer in terms of my story telling. The mechanics I'm still working on as I'm sure you can see.

I sincerely appreciate the support I've gotten in writing this story and I respect the couple of reviewers who've gotten upset with me for daring to write it. This is where I'm learning to grow a tougher skin by pushing myself to do things I might not otherwise do. And by sharing these stories which isn't the easiest thing in the world to do with a Back From the Shadowlands or a Settling the Score.

In closing, I simply want to remind my readers this isn't a sweet story at the moment though it will end happily. It is and will continue to be dark for another two to four chapters. We'll see how it goes and how much dark I really want to write.

Thank you again for reading.

Calla


	5. Chapter 4

To my male guest – Thank you so much for the review and the kind words. It's greatly appreciated. I do want to address the line that bothered you.

From a woman's perspective, it was meant as a deep compliment, not a slam, though I think it might have been interpreted differently from the male perspective. Oh, my, not my intention at all! Believe me when I say I'm one of Lisbon's biggest fans and totally in awe of Tunney's ability to bring her so vividly to life. And, yes, I totally agree with you that both the fictional and the literal woman is every bit as lovely as you stated. ~Calla

Tina, Chris, Guests, and all of my reviewers, thank you for the outpouring of support for this story. You guys rock and you keep me writing. Without you, I'd never be willing to crawl into those dark, disturbing places in my quest to deliver a different, interesting story. I don't write for reviews; but, I do write for your reading pleasure even if "pleasure" isn't always the appropriate term. :) Thanks again. ~ Calla

###

Combing his hair, Jane stared at his reflection in Lisbon's mirror. He liked her place. He always had. Unlike his hotel room, it had a cozy, lived in air about it he'd always found comforting. One that had soothed his savage spirit on those nights when everything became too much over the years. Deliberately ignoring the reality it was due more to the presence of a certain brunette than the actual place, Jane breathed deeply of that faint, spicy fragrance he associated so strongly with Lisbon.

Knowing she might not see his actions in the same light, Jane dismissed that thought out of hand. In his not so humble opinion, having the very real connection he felt here was vital to bringing Lisbon home. Sensing her presence kept him fighting through the darkest hours when he was overwhelmed by impotence. By the fear he'd never free her in time.

He couldn't put the blame that was his on the team. They weren't experienced enough adversaries for their nemesis. But, he was. And, so far, he was performing poorly. Batting zero at best.

But, there was a reason for that. Not an excuse; but, a reason.

And that reason was simple: His experience was telling him that Volker had planned much too well over the years to be easily stopped.

Nothing more and nothing less than the fact he had a head start on them not dissimilar to the one Red John had.

Everyone knew how that one was playing out.

Dabbing a generous squeeze of toothepaste on his toothbrush, Jane turned his thoughts to other things. He refused to contemplate how many bodies they'd find buried in the grounds surrounding the monster's lair when they finally located it. He suspected it was a shock not easily anticipated. He would, however, admit that was exactly what they'd find. But, that was a revelation for another day. At the moment, only one body mattered. A living body he intended staying that way.

Forcing unpleasant thoughts from his head, Jane wandered out of the bathroom into the familiar bedroom beyond. Lisbon would never forgive him for sleeping in her bed. He knew that. As he'd mentioned once in passing, the woman was intense and particular. She was quiet _particular_ about her home and she'd be quite _intense_ in her reaction to his violation of it. She was going to verbally castrate him for his audacity. Not that he really cared. In spite of his earlier thoughts, she _would _get over it. She always did.

Not that he was taking anything for granted in assuming the status quo.

He just wasn't wasting any more chances once Lisbon returned to the fold. They'd sacrificed enough of their life force over the years chasing shadows and sins. Red John could step straight to hell and he could take his evil mind games with him. If Jane had learned on thing from this unsavory adventure, it was that he was a bigger fool than he'd thought. They were having that talk as soon as he got his Lisbon back. Neither of them was wasting another precious moment they didn't have to. They might lose their last chance if they did.

Jogging down the stairs, he ambled into Lisbon's kitchen and made a cup of tea before meandering into her den to settle on her couch. Picking up the tablet and turning it on, he wasn't surprised to hear the sound signaling a video would soon fill the screen. Waiting for the window to pop up, he contemplated the things he had to be grateful for instead of the fear steadily growing in his gut as he waited for the next piece of the puzzle to begin.

His biggest blessing was that no one had really questioned his hastily fabricated cover of house sitting while his Boss was away on a sudden family emergency. Fortunately, the spare key he'd swiped from her kitchen drawer late one night a few years ago combined the fact her Super and neighbors had seen him hanging out with Lisbon frequently over the years gave credence to his cover. He was pretty much left in peace to come and go as he pleased.

Turning his attention to the screen, Jane gasped at the scene playing out before him. At the hands clutching at the blood red silk scarf slowly choking the life out of her…Jane didn't need to see the discarded collar on the bedside table to understand Volker's game. He was revealing exactly how Amanda Shaw had died and how easily he could take Lisbon's life if he wanted. Watching her eyes roll back in her head and praying for hands so expertly tightening the ligature to cease, Jane released the breath he'd not known he was holding when her torturer finally allowed Lisbon's limp form to slump mercifully to the bed a few moments later.

Studying the last seconds of the video as it faded to gray, Jane noted gratefully that, against all odds, Lisbon was still breathing.

###

"That is some seriously scary shit." Rigsby said as Jane cut through the bullpen on his way to the attic, familiar blue cup in hand, a scarce half hour later.

"What?" Cho looked up from the file he was studying.

"Did you see, Jane?" Rigsby asked as though his meaning should be perfectly obvious.

"Yeah." Cho's eyes settled back on the page. "What about him?"

"There wasn't a hair out of place." Van Pelt responded knowing Jane usually looked like hell at times like this.

"Jane's not going to let himself fall apart." Cho left the "not with Lisbon involved" hanging in the air unsaid knowing those simple words explained everything.

He did not need to say them.

Rigsby and Van Pelt were bright enough to figure them out.

Or they better be.

"Hey, Cho?" Rigsby resisted the urge to throw the paper airplane in his hand at their temporary Team Leader.

"Yeah?" Cho closed the file and glared at his subordinate.

"You've been in there right?" Rigsby suddenly asked.

"Been in where?" Cho rolled his eyes in annoyance that his cohort wouldn't let him work.

"Jane's Bat Cave." Rigsby said as he bit a healthy bite of the burrito he'd abandoned earlier.

"Yeah." Cho reopened his file and flipped a page.

"What's it like?" Rigsby asked the question Cho knew was coming while Van Pelt looked on with undisguised interest.

"Seriously scary shit." Cho closed the file and leaned back in his chair rubbing his eyes as he tried to forget everything he'd seen in that room.

Not the photographs or maps on the wall.

Those didn't really bother him.

Too much like the standard murder boards found in any Precinct.

But, the video he'd held in his hands….

He still hadn't gotten that loop out of his head.

Fortunately, Jane hadn't been willing to share any further videos after that single moment of weakness. And Cho hadn't raked him over the coals for suppressing evidence. He didn't think he could handle watching any of that again. He honestly didn't. Jane would convey what they needed to know. He was sure of that.

"That's what I thought." Rigsby said while Van Pelt rolled her eyes in disgust that he'd talk with his mouth open.

"You were right." Ever the man of few words, Cho's mind was already on Jane and his hasty sweep through the bullpen.

Something was definitely off and that usually meant Jane was up to something.

And when Jane was up to something he needed to know so he could head it off at the pass.

They couldn't afford for their consultant to go Lone Ranger on them or for all hell to break out in ways only Jane could cause.

The situation was much too volatile and Lisbon's life hung in the balance.

Now wasn't the time for missteps.

Even well intentioned ones.

Rising to his feet, Cho closed the file and headed for the stairs feeling two sets of eyes on his back. He didn't have to say a thing for the rest of his team to know he was off to beard the lion in his den. He needed to know what was going through the other man's head.

###

"You're not seeing anything else, Cho." Jane said through the sliver in the door that was much too narrow for the Agent to either squeeze through or get the necessary leverage to force his entrance.

"Let me in, Jane." Cho's stance conveyed he wasn't backing down. "We need to talk."

"I don't have time to waste talking with you." Jane said. "I have work to do."

"You can keep your precious videos; but, I need to know that Lisbon's okay." Cho finally forced his way into the by now familiar room when Jane suddenly released his hold on the door. "We all do and only you can tell us."

"She's not that badly injured if that's what you're asking." Jane settled into the comfortable leather chair he'd moved into the room a few days ago. "Not physically anyways. Not yet."

"What's that supposed to mean?" Cho settled in the other less comfortable straight up and down wooden chair gracing the room.

"She has a few cuts and bruises and an electrical burn on her neck where she tried to make a run for it this morning. I think she learned her lesson on that one. She won't be making a break for it again or I hope she won't. Volker has that collar around her neck programmed to kill if she reaches the end of the hall." Jane stated much too calmly deciding what he'd witnessed a few hours ago was much too close.

"Does the Boss know?" Cho asked.

"What do you think?" Jane answered a question with a question. "You've seen the video."

"We have no way to tell her." Cho needlessly pointed out.

"Lisbon's smart, Cho, she'll figure it out without anyone telling her." Jane reassured him. "In fact, I'm sure she already has. I've been watching her over the last few hours since it happened. She's very careful to stay within the parameters of the two rooms she's allowed to roam."

"That's supposed to make it better?" Cho snapped finding Jane's attitude much too cavalier for his liking.

"No, Cho it isn't. But, it'll go a long way in keeping her alive until we can get her out of there." Jane said reasonably.

"Maybe." That was as much as he was willing to give as he crossed his arms silently indicating he wasn't done. "What have you seen that we need know?"

"Not a lot. From what I can see of the outside through the windows in the room, she could be anywhere. Like I've already said, I'm betting on some kind of summer house or hunting estate out in the sticks somewhere that's been in the family since goodness only knows when.

The kind of get-away where great granddad used to take the mistress for a fun weekend while great grandma was having the ladies over for afternoon tea. A place whose existence hasn't been common knowledge for a half century or more as it probably fell out of use in favor of love nests closer to town." Jane rambled as he stuck another pen in a new map on another part of the wall that Cho had never seen. "Have Van Pelt check the property records in these towns. I have a feeling we may find what we're looking for either here or here. If not, then we need to check here next. If none of that pans out, then I'm missing the mark and we need to turn our search in another direction."

"We don't have time for missing the mark." Cho said quietly.

"No, we don't." Jane agreed. "That's why I suggest you get a move on with that information I just shared. The sooner we find the viper's nest, the quicker Lisbon can come home."

Writing the names Jane ticked off in his pad, Cho rose slowly to his feet to study Jane's map one last time. While there seemed to be nothing more to it than pulling names out of thin air, he knew there was a method to the other man's madness. Some rhyme to the reason.

There always was.

###

Strolling into the bullpen several hours later after a late lunch run, Jane surveyed the serious faces around him. There wasn't anything new to report from the looks of things. Motioning for Cho to follow him, he led the way up the stairs towards his Cave.

There was only way to discover if his assessment was true.

"Cho, how's Van Pelt's research going?" Jane asked quietly once they were safely ensconced inside.

"She's in the middle of following up on one of your new leads." Cho admitted.

"Do you think it's going to go anywhere?" Jane dared to hope it was.

"It might." Cho saw no reason to elaborate.

At the moment since he didn't have anything concrete to reveal that Jane didn't already know since he'd supplied the lead in the first place.

"Good. We're running out of time." Jane admitted.

"How long do we have?" Cho asked what he didn't want to know sensing things had changed in the last four hours.

"Three or four days…maybe a week tops." Jane stated matter-of-factly.

"You know that how?" Cho asked.

"How do you think?" Jane asked wanting to make the agent work for it.

"Volker's escalating and Lisbon's weakening." The Korean Agent stated the only conclusion he could draw from Jane's evasiveness.

He hated the man's habit of answering a question with a question as much as his Boss did.

"You're right on both counts." Jane confirmed.

It was a reality making her torment that much harder to watch.

"Weakening how?" Cho demanded as he crossed his arms over his chest.

"In every way you would expect." Jane said the words Cho did not want to hear. "While you're all valiant law enforcement officers trained to keep a cool head in times of trouble; I don't think any of the team, with the exception of you, have been trained to endure the kind of torture she's going through."

From the slight nod of his head, Cho silently agreed with Jane's assessment of the situation including his nod to his Special Forces training.

"If you want to know what I'm alluding to, there's one last video you can see." Jane motioned to the tablet laying abandoned on the table. "But, the rule still stands that Lisbon can never know what you've seen. If she does, you're a dead man."

There was no doubting Jane meant his words literally.

"Damn it, Jane." Cho said a few moments later having seen more than he wanted to see yet again. "That's how Volker's assistant died."

"Yes, I suppose it is." Jane agreed not adding that Charles Milk had done the actual killing that time around. Thomas was fully capable of doing his dirty work when the need warranted such action. "Only Volker isn't interested in killing her as he has past victims. His plans are far more devastating as we both know."

"Meaning what?" Cho had never fully been on board with Jane's whole hysterical, "Fate worse than death." scenario.

It seemed out of character the way people tended to drop like flies around Volker. The dude was seriously sick in that he got off on the kill. They all knew that. They'd read his profile. Now, Jane expected him to believe Volker would change his MO to get back at one tiny lady cop? He wasn't buying it. Not one hundred percent.

Then again, now might be the perfect time for his mind to be changed.

From what he'd seen, Volker had needed only a few more moments and a little more pressure for Lisbon to be done. He'd pushed his game to the limits halting over and over just on the cusp of the deed being done with a skill speaking of years of practice. Cho refused to think of the women who'd suffered in just such a way at his hands…Only the one suffering now really mattered anyway…The rest were beyond any help he could give them.

Closing his eyes, he replayed the denouement in his mind.

The one where Volker smoothly unwound that length of red silk from around Lisbon's neck as her limp body fell away drawing the narrow wisp of fabric sensually across her skin in a demented parody of a lover's caress.

Mesmerized by the debauched spectacle playing out before him, Cho would have thought his Boss dead if not for the faintest rising and falling of her chest.

"You have seen videos since?" Cho's tormented gaze bore into Jane's. "Lisbon's okay?"

"She's alive if that's what you mean." Jane's tone was far from comforting. "She's far from okay."

"What you've seen wasn't tampered with?" Cho dared to ask knowing date and time stamps could be changed.

"The Petechial Hemorrhaging about her neck and in her eyes indicates otherwise." Jane answered honestly. "Not to mention the ligature marks."

"You've seen them?" Cho continued to push.

"I've seen a lot of things in the eight hours since that video arrived this morning." Jane confirmed. "None of which you're ever going to see."

"You still believe he'll rape her?" Cho reopened the conversation he'd already had several times with Jane. "Killing her would be so much cleaner."

"You still don't believe me." Jane said wearily. "Cho, I'm going to say this one last time and I'm done. We're never having this conversation again. No, he won't kill Lisbon and he won't rape her if we let it get that far.

What he has planned is far worse. Remember the Hollister Case from, what, four years ago? The one the SAC PD bungled badly enough there were ten victims before they called us in?"

In all fairness, the SAC PD hadn't really bungled anything. They just hadn't discovered the crime until the first five bodies were found in five very different communities on the outskirts of Sacramento. They hadn't even realized they might be interrelated until they'd found the eighth victim.

Hollister, being one of the most brilliant strategists the local PD had ever seen, deliberately varied his MO so much the victimologies never meshed into a readily identifiable pattern. Experienced Homocide Detectives had confidently believed they had three separate perps on their hands. It had taken Jane to find that one well disguised similarity between the cases that had saved the eleventh victim and bagged their monster although he still wasn't sure saving the victim had been the most merciful thing to happen.

Death might have been kinder.

The latest update from the psychiatric hospital where Carley Holmes resided indicated otherwise. It seemed she had yet to leave the altered reality she'd escaped into when her mind finally shattered. From what he'd read, her prognosis wasn't good. The pretty auburn haired Nurse Practitioner would never practice again. She'd mostly likely remain locked in a world of her own creation.

"Yeah, I remember." Cho's tone said he wished he hadn't.

The trophies they'd found had been bad enough.

What was left of Carley Holmes had been worse.

He still had occasional nightmares involving what he'd seen and Jane was intimating _that_ could happen to Lisbon?

"Volker has one of those rooms." Jane said quietly.

"Shit." Jane wasn't intimating anything.

"An apt sentiment in this case I should say." Jane continued. "He isn't going to use it any time soon. He's enjoying the game far too much at the moment."

"You're sure about that?" Cho asked.

"Yeah, I'm sure." He was staking Lisbon's life on it.

"You better be." Cho's tone conveyed he was well aware of that fact.

"Cho, I know there's a profiler or two from a couple of different outside agencies doing their thing; but, you don't need to listen to them. You have to keep Van Pelt working the Public Records angle just like she's doing. When she locates the right property, I'll know it and we'll end this thing." Jane studied the newest map on his wall as though he was seeing something Cho couldn't.

"Why shouldn't we listen to the FBI Profilers Bertram called in?" Cho asked. "They know their stuff."

"I suppose they do; but, I know Volker." Jane said. "They've already told you he doesn't fit the usual profile in that he's wealthy, not middle classed; but, he's got all the other bases covered.

They've probably said that Volker is far more charming and charismatic than he has a right to be. Oh, and he's quite the narcissist. We already know all of that. That he's a thinker and he's more ritualistic than impulsive though he can be spontaneous which is how we caught him in the first place. He gets off on power and control both of which he clearly has in this situation. He's aroused by the suffering he's causing Lisbon by what he's doing to her and by the mental anguish he's causing me by sharing her torment. He's planned every detail of his crime right down to how he intends it to end. That the videos he's sending are a very normal part of his sickness and that he's probably taking photographs as well. They're right. He is. I've seen him. He takes trophies as well. He's a sexual deviant of one kind or another though we've yet to identify his specific tendencies beyond he likes hurting women. He seems himself as omnipotent in spite of what Lisbon did to him and that's why she has to pay. She dared to challenge him in the first place.

I'm right so far aren't I?" Jane's tone was faintly confrontational.

"Yeah, close enough." Cho confirmed.

"That's all useless garbage available to the general public on the Internet." Jane continued. "As is the fact that, due to his seemingly limitless wealth, Volker has had a lot of time and resources with which to plan the perfect torture palace where he's been enacting his fantasies on hapless victims for years with no one the wiser. Though he might be a sadist, the man's no fool. He knows how his hobby would be viewed by his peers so he keeps his perverse desires well masked under that pretty face and deceptively oily charm.

In case you think differently, Volker feels no remorse or guilt over what he is doing to your Boss. In his eyes, Lisbon deserves everything she's getting. She dared to make a fool of him. That isn't something he can allow to go unpunished. He's too much of a narcissist to allow such a thing without adequate retaliation. That's why his MO is slightly different this time. He has a specific goal tailored to a specific victim in mind.

What isn't so useless for our purposes? Understanding that Volker has a low threshold of boredom tells us exactly why he's escalating so quickly. Why torment that was more psychological in the beginning is becoming progressively more physical in a handful of days. The man can't help himself.

I'd say we have two, maybe three days, max before he moves the party down to the basement and we can kiss Lisbon as we know her good-bye." Jane said quietly silently vowing he'd never allow that happen yet again.

"That isn't going to happen." Cho growled repeating the words banging around in Jane's head. "Van Pelt thinks she'll have something for us by tomorrow morning at the latest. She's hot on the trail of a property that came into the family when Volker's great great grandfather married a California socialite back before the turn of the century. She hasn't been able to unravel the corporate red tape enough to get an address on the place yet; but, she thinks she's close."

"That may be our lair." Jane agreed not daring to get his hopes up.

For all they knew, the property could have burned to the ground fifty years ago and they'd find themselves back at square one.

"It's not the same place you set her on; but, it is a property she came across during that search." Cho continued.

"Good, then it really may mean something before she's done." Jane's mind was obviously already back on the tablet laying abandoned on his rickety desk as though seeing something Cho couldn't see. "You need to go, Cho. We've all got work to do and I've wasted too much time talking already."

"Maybe; but, you're hiding something we need to know." Cho said suddenly thinking back over Jane's last few sentences. "What do you mean the torment is getting progressively more physical?"

"You aren't watching the video, Cho, so don't even go there." They'd have a serious throw down if Cho pushed that point.

Jane felt sure he could take him if push came to shove. He wasn't as defenseless as he let on as he'd put the CBI gym to good use over the years.

"I don't want to see the video." Cho realized he was crossing into dangerous territory that could lead to physical confrontation by Jane's stance. "I only want to know what _you_ saw."

"Too damned much." Jane confirmed his worst fears.

"What's that supposed to mean?" Cho demanded deciding if it came to a physical confrontation then so be it.

He was going to find out what Jane knew one way or another.

"He's using her body against her now." Jane said quietly not willing to get any more graphic about what he'd seen than that.

Lisbon deserved to keep some dignity out of all of this.

"More than what I saw?" Cho asked quietly.

"He's forcing a physical response from her body against Lisbon's will." Jane quietly repeated what he'd been watching before Cho had so rudely interrupted him. Actually the video had been over a long time ago. He'd been replaying it in his mind. "Her body is betraying her mind and her soul and she's not handling it well."

Cho silently asked the question he didn't want to ask.

"She's falling apart exactly as you'd expect." Jane said quietly. "It doesn't matter that she's a cop and she understands how these things happen. That it's a purely involuntary physiological response to external stimuli. Who cares what the law enforcement textbooks say? Or your continuing education courses for that matter? She's also a woman who's being violated by a man she despises. End of story."

"Shit." There wasn't anything else Cho could say.

"Cho, between you and me, you need to prepare the team for the harsh realities they might not be ready to accept." Jane refused to look away. "Even if we free her tomorrow, the Lisbon we get back isn't going to be one taken from us. Not any time soon and maybe never. What's she's going through changes a woman. You have to know that."

"What about you?" Cho wondered aloud having noted the subtle changes in his Boss's relationship with her consultant since that whole Vegas debacle.

There was more going on there than met the eye and he hoped this whole Volker thing didn't derail what he thought he was seeing. If he was, that would explain the intense suffering in the other man's eyes that he was trying so valiantly to hide. Especially if he felt he was seeing his woman being violated. For once, Cho was glad he wasn't getting to see those videos even if he might see things Jane was missing.

"Me? I'm not going anywhere." Jane said quietly trying not to think of the poignantly personal messages Lisbon sent over every now and then that she thought he'd never hear. "We have a date for a very special talk as soon as all of this is over. One I'm hoping will change everything between us."

Cho hoped he didn't misread that light in the other man's eyes. Or that he wasn't misinterpreting Jane's confession. It sounded like Lisbon was going to need all the help she could get. From what he'd been seeing over the last few months, Jane would be just the person to give it.

"Good." That was what he'd been hoping to hear.

"Now that you've been reassured, I really need you to go." Jane said firmly unwilling to open any more doors to unnecessary discussions that could wait until a later date. "I have videos to watch and you have records to search. The sooner we find where Lisbon's being held, the sooner all of this will be over."

Cho nodded as he watched Jane settle at his desk, tablet in hand, before slipping silently out the door.

###

**A/N: The next chapter will be from Lisbon's perspective so it MAY be more graphic in nature. It depends on how far into the dark side my Muse feels like walking at the time I'm writing. However, nothing written will be for prurient reasons or for shock value. It will be in the name of making the experience feel more "real" and because the story naturally flows in that direction ~Calla **


	6. Chapter 5

To My Readers: You are the only reason this story is still being written. As you can probably tell, nothing is really sacred in my world when a plunny consumes my thoughts. But, that doesn't mean this isn't a difficult story to bring into being. While I have my research, past psychology courses, life experiences, and my Muse to guide me, it's the reception for StS that keeps me striving to deliver a quality story that's somewhat realistic for what it is.

I'm truly honored and humbled that you've hung in with me this long and that this story has generated the kind of commentary that it has. You've made stepping out on a very scary limb worth the anxiety. :)

As always, Tina, Lala, and Guests, thank you for the reviews and the support. They are always appreciated.~Calla

###

Lounging on the window seat, head resting on her knees, Lisbon gazed longingly at the forest beyond.

If only she could figure a way past the glass and iron so effectively locking her in…If only she could feel the grass beneath her bare feet…If only she could make it into the trees beyond the well manicured garden…If only she had her Glock with a single bullet…If only the mirrors in her rooms weren't safety glass…If only Jane were here to save her….

There were too damned many "if onlys" she couldn't get past.

She'd pondered every last one of them a thousand different ways in her mind.

Including the one where she smashed a mirror into a zillion deadly shards and slashed Volker to bloody bits for his trouble.

Like that could ever happen.

He'd spent too much time and money converting a long forgotten family get-away into a physical and psychological torture chamber and a prison of hopelessness.

Lisbon comforted herself with one last twisted thought.

In spite of all of that, the _real _torture chamber complete with all the fun stuff was down in the basement. She hadn't been there yet. But this was close enough.

As frustrating as it was to admit, there wasn't a single thing in either room she could use against Volker. He'd made sure of that. That being said, she wasn't completely out of options.

She could walk out her unlocked bedroom door knowing full well something nasty was bound to happen if she did.

But at least she'd have tried to make a break for it.

Lisbon considered her choices starting with worst case scenarios:

For all she knew there were dogs out there waiting to curtail her last bid for freedom. Dogs with powerful jaws and big gnashy teeth trained to rip her to shreds on sight. Hell of a way to go being torn apart by dogs. The good news, she hadn't heard any barks or seen anything to indicate dogs were a possibility. But, that didn't mean they weren't out there somewhere. The property was vast and the kennels could be anywhere.

Or there might be armed guards waiting to shoot her down or worse. Lisbon laughed aloud at the "or worse" her mind automatically tacked onto that thought. What could possibly be worse than the situation she was already in?

Than having Volker force her body to release and laugh when she ran to hug the toilet tossing her guts in self disgust...

For the first time in her life, Lisbon could finally say she knew what hate felt like. And what Jane must feel every time he contemplated Red John walking around alive and well and killing again. Fighting a fresh bout of the hurls, Lisbon refused to go there choosing to think about the things she _could_ do instead. She was a cop. She wasn't just a helpless woman. And _cops_ did things.

They didn't wait in terror for something evil to this way come.

The one thing she could do was find out what the stupid piece of metal complete with microchips surrounding her neck was _really_ for. She was sure it wasn't the latest Sci Fi fashion statement. Van Pelt would have shown her the picture in one of her girly magazines if it was and she hadn't. That being said, her gunmetal accessory had to have a far more sinister purpose than just letting a certain rat bastard know her whereabouts. Lisbon would bet a month's salary on it.

Volker wouldn't leave her door unlocked if that was all it did.

Rising determinedly to her feet, Lisbon headed for the door trying to ignore the fact she was wearing nothing but skimpy underwear. She could be naked for all she cared. All that truly mattered was making her final escape when she got the chance. She was determined that chance was now.

She'd worry about what came next once she was out of here.

Opening her door and slipping into the hall, Lisbon put her thoughts into action making a run for it noting the faint flash of red near the baseboard about the time she was brought to her knees by a teeth clanging jolt. Feeling a second and third current passing through her, Lisbon knew she had to act or the shocks would keep coming. Heading for that door thirty feet away was out of the question. There were several more of those sensors on the baseboard like that one between where she was and her goal. Sensors that would probably trigger stronger and stronger shocks the closer she got to freedom.

Given what she knew of Volker, that last one would probably kill her and Lisbon wasn't ready to die. Re-evaluting her stance, she pushed herself to her hands and knees. As humiliating as crawling back towards her room was, she was incapable of rising to her feet. Her legs wouldn't hold her up. Hanging her head, Lisbon took a deep breath and forced her trembling limbs to support her. Pushing first one hand and one knee in front of the other she inched her way back to her room grateful to escape any further shocking surprises.

Collapsing on the rug inside her domain and pulling the door closed behind her, Lisbon refused to acknowledge the tears trickling from her eyes. Forcing herself to breathe slowly through the pain, Lisbon took stock of her body. While the jolts had been unpleasant and she was sure she had a large burn on her neck, she didn't think the voltage had been high enough to cause any permanent damage to her internal organs. Her heart rate, while elevated, wasn't overly erratic or dangerously high beneath her fingertips.

Rolling over, Lisbon crawled over to her bare bed and pulled herself up on the mattress. Collapsing on her pillows, she knew Volker had witnessed her latest travesty. How could he not? There were cameras everywhere. Listening intently for footsteps in the silent hall, Lisbon prayed aloud for a few precious moments to compose herself before he made his dreaded appearance.

Opening her eyes with no clear recollection of how much time had passed, Lisbon realized she must have fallen into a doze. Hearing the sound of laughter coming from the door, she also realized what had awakened her. Pushing herself into a sitting position, Lisbon backed against the headboard futilely attempting to get as far from the man ambling towards her as she could get.

"That wasn't very smart, Teresa." Volker said as he dodged a kick before grabbing the leg striking out at him to easily haul Lisbon within reach. "Surely you didn't think I'd let you escape?" She hated that obnoxious smile more than anything. "Or that I wouldn't find out about your ridiculous escape?"

Reacting instinctively to Volker's words, Lisbon swung wildly hoping to make contact only to feel a hand grasping her neck and fingers pressing into the burn marring her tender skin instead. Biting back a yelp, she fought to remain fully conscious as Volker tightened his grip. Determined to keep fighting, she kicked out again and smiled malevolently at his pained grunt. At least she'd made contact bore she was done. Darkness bleeding across her sight, Lisbon struggled back to full consciousness as his fingers released their grip only to be replaced by a length of expensive red Oriental silk.

Startled by the thought this was how Amanda Shaw died, Lisbon reached up to grasp the scarf biting into her flesh. Pulling against it, she tried to break Volker's hold as her nails digging into his hands were having little effect. Feeling things _shifting_ in her neck, Lisbon knew she was much too close to the irreversible if she couldn't relieve the overpowering pressure…To her trachea crushing, to the flow of blood cutting off to her heart and to her brain, to her hyoid bone breaking, to any number of life altering things…Fingers suddenly relaxing, jumbled thoughts ceasing, Lisbon fell into the darkness only to jerk awake as oxygen poured into her lungs and the torment began all over again….

###

Gliding through the bullpen, Jane dropped the box of pastries on Rigsby's desk on his way upstairs. Hopefully, the team would appreciate the extra effort he'd gone to in bringing them their favorite doughnuts and leave him alone for a while. His morning had started off with a bang and he needed some down time to collect his thoughts. Hearing Rigsby's comment about 'seriously scary shit' in passing, Jane smirked at the man's eloquence. But, he had to agree with the sentiment. Any other time he'd be showing definite signs of raveling around the edges were it a Red John case. But, this wasn't a Red John case. This was a Lisbon case and that was an entirely different animal than any other.

###

Eyes flickering open to find herself mercifully alone, Lisbon lightly touched her throat. Keeping her wits about her, she'd finally surrendered to the darkness and allowed herself to go limp beneath Volker's assault. Semi-conscious, she'd forced herself to keep her eyes closed and her body motionless...Even when she'd felt that red silk gliding sensually over her skin and between her legs in an erotic parody of a lover's caress….

Lightly caressing the tender skin of her neck, Lisbon closed her eyes losing herself in more pleasant memories than the tortures so recently suffered. Stumbling into the bathroom, she stared at her reflection in the mirror. For a woman in solitary confinement, she looked like she'd been through a war zone. For one, that electrical burn on her neck was red, painful, and open. For another, ligature marks were rapidly darkening in a circular pattern and don't get her started on the red and purple petechiae dotting her pale skin and the whites of her eyes. They looked disgustingly like some kind of innocent rash.

Gazing at the wreck that was Senior Agent Teresa Lisbon of the CBI, she felt her legs beginning to tremble. Not just her legs, but her hands, arms, and every other part of her that could move. Sinking to her knees, Lisbon backed against the wall between the cabinets and the toilet drawing her legs against her chest. Delayed shock was finally setting in. She'd come much too close to dying and her body knew it even if mind didn't want to accept it.

The minutest miscalculation on Volker's part and she'd have been done.

Closing her eyes, Lisbon forced her thoughts in more pleasant directions. She'd lose what little sense she had left if she didn't.

Thinking back over their "date" at _Trevor's, _Lisbon's smile was bittersweet recalling everything from the look in Jane's eyes when he'd first risen to his feet upon her arrival to their flirtatious banter the rest of the night. As much as she wanted to deny it, she'd had a really good time. Jane could be a very pleasant companion when he wanted to be and he'd wanted to be that night. Enough so she'd almost felt their "date" wasn't just a "date"; but, something a whole lot more.

She'd been slightly shocked, and secretly delighted, by the open appreciation in the eyes sweeping over her. In a look more suited to a man evaluating a desirable woman than his partner from work. That Jane was pleased with the small concessions she'd made to their evening together was clearly evident by that half smile briefly touching his lips. The one always making her realize how devastating the man really was. Far more dangerous than his overt good looks, there was that certain _something_ about Jane drawing women like flies.

If Lisbon didn't know better, she'd say it was that very potent roguish aura of devilment he wore like a second skin.

Smirking slightly, she allowed herself to revel in the satisfaction she'd felt realizing Jane quite obviously liked that her blouse was a tad bit lower and her heels a tad bit higher than she usually wore. He'd like her brighter make up and her softer hair. If she didn't know better, she'd have said he was having a hard time not dragging his fingers through her locks…As shocking as it might seem, though she would have protested at the time, she wouldn't have really minded if he had. Not in the slightest.

Their relationship had been changing, evolving, and becoming subtly different than anything they'd ever had before for a while though neither was willing to act on it. They'd simply chosen to ignore it as their lives were much easier that way. Now, Lisbon wasn't so sure they'd been wise. They might never get the chance to explore that indefinable _something_ between them she'd hoped they would.

Resting her chin on her knees and noting she wasn't shaking quite as bad, Lisbon recalled the slight surprise she'd gotten when she'd asked Jane who he'd had in mind when he'd sat on reservations to the hottest new restaurant in Sacramento for month. She'd never expected him to admit he'd always assumed it would be her. She'd been taken aback by the look in his eyes and the corresponding response she'd felt deep inside. And she'd reacted in typical Lisbon fashion: she'd not said a bloody thing. Just let the silence loom between them. Oh, and then she'd looked at him with wide green eyes betraying far more than she meant to…at least to Jane. She was sure of it by that hint of a smile suddenly curving his lips. He looked like the cat who'd just eaten the canary.

While she might not have known how to take such an admission, she'd been around the block enough to know _Trevor's _wasn't the kind of place a man took his partner from work. Not if she was _just_ his partner. Not unless they had something _really_ big to celebrate. And in Jane's universe, while a promotion, commendation, or her birthday may have qualified, the Arraignment of Thomas Volker most certainly did not.

That being said, his choice of restaurant left only one other possibility considering he was Jane. Her consultant had been subtly conveying he was interested in her like _that_. And, as much as she'd tried to deny it, _she_ was interested in him in much the same way. She had been for a number of years. But, she'd never been willing to act on it.

Jane wasn't ready.

And, neither was she.

Things had changed since Vegas, for both of them, and she wished she'd responded differently. Wished she'd acknowledged his much too subtle overtures. Wished she'd brazenly taken him home with her or allowed him to take her home with him. He'd have picked a more upscale hotel than his usual dive…a nice place more in keeping with their evening at _Trevor's_.

She was as sure of that as she was that she wouldn't have been disappointed if she had.

And she wouldn't have disappeared.

Plus, she'd have finally known what it was like to be in Jane's arms.

An event she might never experience now.

Softly beating her head against the wall, Lisbon lamented her stupidity over and over again.

###

Closing the door to his haven behind him, Jane took a sip of tea before setting his cup aside. Removing his jacket and draping it over the uncomfortable wooden chair _he_ refused to sit in, Jane kicked off his shoes. Plopping down, he wallowed into corner of his couch and reached for the despised tablet. Turning it on, he was sure there was a video waiting for him. Scoffing at the silent screen, Jane reached into the white paper bag and dropped a fry in his mouth. Deciding they needed ketchup and a sprinkle of salt, he unwrapped his hamburger and took a bite. Chewing his lunch which wasn't half bad, he was mildly disturbed Volker had varied his MO yet again. He should be watching video feed right about…now.

Well, maybe the freak wasn't varying his MO after all.

Maybe he was just running a bit late.

Watching Lisbon meander into the bathroom, Jane wasn't surprised to see her futilely throw her towel over that camera yet again. She had to know that wasn't the only camera in the room; but, she was hoping against hope that it was. Deluding herself into believing such fallacy was probably the only way she could bring herself to take of her personal needs.

Lisbon was an intensely private person.

And Volker had a nasty habit of sending feed over during the most intimate of moments. Jane had gotten an eyeful at bath time more than once over the last few evenings. As shameful as it was, he'd not been gentleman enough to look away. While he'd justified his actions in the name of protecting Lisbon, there was more to his perusal than just ensuring she didn't have any concealed injuries he didn't know about.

He was nowhere near that noble.

He was guilty, instead, of that innate, masculine desire to see what was under that crisp business suit and those crystal clear safety glass shower doors left little to the imagination.

He wasn't disappointed by what he saw.

Lisbon was a beautiful woman.

Sleek, strong, and slender, she was nicely curved for her petite frame.

The only real shame in his seeing her was the circumstance and the fact he wasn't the only only watching her. Jane cringed realizing Lisbon had to know that bastard was reveling in her pathetic attempts to scrub his touch away. She knew; but, couldn't bring herself to stop and Jane was certain he didn't blame her. He would be doing exactly the same.

Watching Lisbon lean over the lavatory counter to gaze into the mirror, he saw her lift her chin exposing the long line of her throat. That electrical burn at the juncture of neck and shoulder was bad. He'd known that at the time he'd watched her receive it. Nobody got shocks like that and walked away unscathed. Second degree from what he could see and likely to get infected. The blisters that had boiled to the surface had ruptured under Volker's tender silken scarf ministrations leaving open, weeping wounds in need of attention behind.

Attention he was sure they would never get.

As Lisbon tilted her head in the opposite direction, Jane became aware of the faint red and purple spots blotching her skin like a rash. He knew better. The discoloration was where the small capillaries had burst beneath the intense pressure Volker applied to her neck and they were indicative of the degree of trauma she suffered at his hands. Jane shook his head at the ridiculous thought that, contrary to the norm, the lighting must be excellent in that bathroom for him to see the petechial hemorrhaging as clearly as he was. Stepping back, Lisbon stared at her face in the mirror clearly deciding she looked like hell. Jane cursed high definition video as he gazed into her beautiful emerald eyes reflecting back at him with frightening clarity. Her neck wasn't the only place she had the betraying petechiae.

As Lisbon lifted her hand in front of her, Jane clearly saw what she was seeing: her fingers beginning to tremble uncontrollably.

Watching Lisbon sink to the floor drawing herself into a tightly wound ball lodged tightly between the cabinet and the toilet, Jane resisted the urge to shout at her to pull herself together. Such a ridiculous action was futile. She couldn't hear a thing. Contrary to her delusions of security, tossing a towel over the visible camera did not stop the hidden lens on the other side of the room from taping her downfall. Lisbon's coming so thoroughly apart was a very dangerous event Volker should never see. They both knew that.

Trying to ignore the tears streaming down Lisbon's cheeks, Jane vowed that was another thing Volker would pay for. And he'd pay in blood. No one made his Lisbon cry. Not like _that_ and not for _those _reasons.

Watching her swipe the tears away, Jane wasn't all that surprised when Lisbon struggled to her feet to lean on the marble countertop. Supporting her weight on one arm, she raised her hand to her throat with a far-away look in her eyes. Closing her eyes, Lisbon continued to stand lost in her thoughts not reacting to the sounds around her.

While he usually read Lisbon quite well, Jane didn't have a clue what she was thinking right about now and he found that strangely disconcerting.

###

Hand to her aching throat, Lisbon knew she'd just made a major blunder a while ago. But, she'd not been able to help herself. She'd let Volker see she was breaking in ways she'd managed to keep well hidden before now. As much as she'd like to think otherwise, she knew he'd seen her very real loss of control. Lisbon was under no illusions there weren't multiple cameras in every room in the house in addition to the ones that were clearly visible. It just made her life more bearable to pretend tossing that towel over the lens hiding in plain sight accomplished something when she knew it didn't.

Shaking her head, Lisbon decided she'd come much too close to dying today. She'd seen the writing on the wall as darkness descended over and over again…Her tormentor was too consumed by his lusts to be fully cognizant of what he was doing…She'd known she was going to die…Or so she'd been thought…But, the tiniest bit more pressure for a few seconds more and she'd have been done…She wouldn't have come back from the other side…She'd been convinced that was going to happen.

She should have known better.

Volker had proven himself a master of his art. He'd caused her eyes to roll back in her head and her breath to stop in her chest over and over again for his demented pleasures. He'd made infinitesimal structures within her shift dangerously. Powerless to stop him as they'd both known she would be; her fingers had curled futilely into crimson silk scratching his skin and drawing blood. Until she'd finally lost consciousness.

Knowing as soon as her fluttering eyelids signaled her return to the land of the living her torment would begin all over again.

Hanging her head in shame as she sank deeper into despair, Lisbon recalled the sharp, involuntary jerk of her body as Volker leaned over to drag his wet tongue over the curve of her breast before grasping his damnable scarf and walking out the door without a backwards glance.

Lisbon studied her hands blindly feeling waves of weariness washing over her as she silently admitted the one thing she'd refused to accept.

As strong as she was, she was fast reaching the end of her endurance.

She couldn't take much more of this.

She honestly couldn't.

Not even for Jane.


	7. Chapter 6

A/N: Tina, the Muse wanted to work on this one so I'm sorry no final chapter of Ouroboros yet! However, happy belated B-Day!

Tina, Anna, and guests, thank you for the reviews as always!

While I don't have a TUMBLR account, I can always be reached by PM.~Calla

###

Wiping his hand over his face, Jane decided he'd had enough. They'd get the break they needed today and Lisbon would be back home by this time tomorrow. There was something significant he was overlooking. He could feel it deep inside. Whatever that something was, he fully intended to find it and find it soon.

Caressing the wicked piece of plastic in his hand, Jane contemplated his love-hate relationship with the electronic toy. He loved the pad because it was his only connection to Lisbon and he hated it for that very reason. Because, while it reassured him she was still alive and fighting, it also reminded him why he had to question such a thing in the first place.

And speaking of fighting, she'd put up a hell of a fight this morning and gotten pretty banged up for her trouble. Volker hadn't liked her response to his latest torturous head game and Jane hadn't liked Volker's response. That was why they had to get Lisbon out of there today before she pushed the maniac too far. Jane's bitter laugh sounded raw to his ears. He should have known, if there a single woman out there who could make Thomas Volker crazier than he already was, that would be Lisbon.

She'd driven him batty for years.

Turning his thoughts to other things, Jane pondered what he knew. There were teams on call that could be mobilized at the drop of a hat. Teams experienced in these kinds of extractions having nothing to do with the CBI. Bertram had made sure of that. He wanted to keep Lisbon's kidnapping out of the press at any cost until her rescue was a "fait accompli". Those were Bertram's pompous words not his.

Personally, he'd just as soon they keep the whole sordid mess out of the press though he knew that wouldn't be possible once the story broke.

While they'd managed to keep the true nature of Lisbon's disappearance from their co-workers for the weeks since the nightmare began, some of the braver souls were already nosing about where they shouldn't. And they were talking about Lisbon's absence alot. The only consolation was, while there were rumors, there was nothing remotely accurate being bandied about. Jane's personal favorite was she'd run off with a lover for a little R & R. Nothing could farther from the truth or any more un-Lisbon. Such stupidity just went to show how well her co-workers really knew the Senior Agent. Unfortunately, with all the speculating going on, it was only a matter of time before they were busted. Once that happened, the media vultures would descend. At that point they'd lose any element of surprise they might have in launching their rescue efforts.

And that could very well cost Lisbon her life if Volker suddenly decided to cut his losses.

He couldn't let that happen.

Feeling nauseous, Jane discarded the tablet yet again on his desk and rose to his feet. After what he'd just seen, and the rabbit trails his thoughts had just taken, he knew his back was against the wall. There wasn't any choice but to act and act soon. To mobilize those shadowy specialists only a phone call away.

Walking over to the map on his wall, Jane contemplated the red pins sticking from strategic locations. Van Pelt wasn't the only member of the team diligently searching public records for the most insignificant of clues. Scratching his head as he studied the roads bleeding out from Sacramento, Jane removed first one pin and then another until he was staring at three distinct locations in three different towns with one probability sticking out most in his mind.

He needed to cross check his hypothesis with the rest of the team and with Van Pelt's findings in particular. That was the only way to know if he was finally on the right track. Unfortunately, that couldn't be done from here.

Exiting his dark hole in the wall, Jane headed for the men's room down the hall. The one no one liked to use because it was old, dingy, musty, and depressing. Perfect for him and his needs. Pushing through the door, he was glad to find the place as deserted as he'd known it would be. Turning on the tap, he splashed his face with water several times before dabbing his skin with rough paper towels. Staring at his reflection, he reached into his pocket to remove his comb. Dragging the comb through his hair neatening wild curls, Jane schooled his features into a bland mask betraying none of the turmoil roiling his gut.

He was fast reaching the end of his endurance and that last video had almost catapulted him over the edge.

Exiting the men's room, Jane headed for the stairs. In a matter of moments he was striding towards Lisbon's empty office and the bullpen beyond. He wasn't surprised at the looks on familiar faces as they took in his appearance. They still weren't comfortable with Every-Hair-In-Place Jane when he should be Out-Of–Control-Rumpled Jane.

What they didn't know wouldn't hurt them.

He was out of control.

He was crazy out of control.

He just wasn't showing it.

"Grace, play time is over." Jane said as he suddenly draped an arm around the red headed Agent's shoulders as he studied her computer screen over her head. "Show me what you've got."

Starting at the sound of his voice, Van Pelt glanced behind her as she nodded to the chair by her desk. Glad he'd taken her advice as his vibe was seriously freaking her out, Van Pelt watched Jane sink into the chair she'd indicated before accepting the stack of papers she handed him. Their Mentalist was all business as he flipped through the pages quickly absorbing the pertinent data from some and discarding the rest. Having watched that trick a thousand times over the years, none of the team was sure exactly how or what Jane was doing. Just that he was somehow speed reading and picking up on cues invisible to the rest of them.

Glancing up to make sure no one was dawdling within hearing distance, and finding the area mercifully deserted, Jane motioned Rigsby and Cho in a little closer. Speaking quietly, Jane kept his eyes on the perimeter watching an Agent occasionally milling by with their minds clearly on other things. Given the majority of his co-workers were out working cases and they swept the bull pen regularly for electronic devices, Jane wasn't overly concerned with anyone hearing their more generalized discussions at the moment. As long as there was no one within ear shot, they were fine to continue working in the plain sight as it would arouse less suspicion than going behind closed doors. They'd realized that early on and tried to keep their pow wows in Lisbon's office to a minimum.

"We need to search this one, this one, and this one." Jane laid three distinct piles of papers on the table in front of him as he spoke quietly realizing he'd not expected to hit the mother lode quite so soon. "Discard all the rest."

What the team didn't know was Van Pelt's research clearly supported his earlier guesses when he'd pulled all but three stick pins from his map and he wasn't going to tell them. There was no reason they needed to know he was doing research independent of them. No reason they needed to think he didn't trust their investigative abilities. He did.

He simply trusted his own more.

"What do you mean discard all the rest?" Cho asked not sure he was willing to go on nothing but a "Jane Hunch" when Lisbon's life was at stake.

"Do I really need to spell it out?" Jane understood Cho's reservations; but, his misguided distrust of the direction he was steering them could get his Boss killed. "She's being held at one of these properties."

"Based on what?" Rigsby asked deciding maybe Cho had a point. "All we really know is Van Pelt found eight possible locations and you're discarding five of them."

"For good reason." Jane said quietly refusing to give into his urge to slam his fist down on the table and chide the team for their stupidity. "Forget the two warehouses. Volker isn't going to be cliché enough to make his lair in any of the places we'd look first given his past. He's too smart for that. Forget the love nest on the lake since it was lost to a lightning strike sixty years ago.

I don't know how you missed the entire structure burned to the ground; but, all I can say is, "Damn it, Cho."

Sloppy work like this is going to cost Lisbon everything." Jane spat as he tossed the papers aside.

"Keep going." Cho ignored Jane's outburst deciding maybe their Mentalist was seeing things they'd overlooked and he didn't mean sooty foundations and chimneys.

Besides, when the man was right he was right. There was no excuse for not noticing that property had burned to a crisp sixty years ago. It was sloppy police work. Oh, and those warehouses were the first place they'd decided to look. He'd quickly pointed out the error of their ways.

"Forget the ocean hide away as well. It's much too exposed for Volker's sick type of games and too far away." Jane flipped to the last page. "And this property is a well known show place. While Volker might hide in plain sight, he wouldn't torture and kill people where he holds his annual Christmas Party. This house is too well known to be the place we're looking for."

"Fine, based on what you've said, we'll put those properties on the back burner." Cho agreed with his assessments now that he'd heard the reasons for them. "Now, where do we start?"

"This one and this one are possibilities though I think _this_ might be the one." Jane tapped one of the pages. "It's the right age, it's been out of use for a while, and it's a comfortable distance from Sacramento without being too far. I'd say about three hours driving distance and a whole lot less in a small plane. Plus, it's fairly secluded since the Volker family still owns most of the land for miles around, and from the satellite imagery, there's enough cleared space around the estate to easily land that small plane I mentioned earlier if he wanted to.

Grace, get me everything you've found on the property." Jane said knowing the initial documents she'd handed him weren't all that she had.

Scrabbling through the papers littering her desk, Van Pelt handed him a folder containing all the documents she'd found not pertinent to the case.

"Join me in, say, fifteen minutes. I'm going to be in Lisbon's office to study these." Jane said as he headed in the direction of the break room before swinging in the direction of Lisbon's office instead.

He'd pick the lock before he made a cup of tea as Cho wasn't parting with Lisbon's emergency key.

No matter his threats.

Jane had to admire Cho's loyalty as Lisbon wasn't anywhere around to discover what he'd done.

Dropping the stack of papers on Lisbon's desk, Jane closed the door behind him before heading into the break room to make that cup of tea. Adding hot water to his cup, he pondered the stack of articles Van Pelt had uncovered over the last few days as he waited for the leaves to steep. Their smoking gun was in there. He just had to find it.

Discarding sodden tea leaves in the trash can, Jane grabbed his cup and meandered back to Lisbon's office. Closing the door behind him, he sank down in her comfortable chair and began skimming the first page in the pile. There was nothing there he didn't already know.

Acting on a hunch, Jane flipped the stack choosing a paper from the bottom instead of the top convinced he'd find what he was looking for in the articles Van Pelt had dismissed as unimportant. It wasn't that the agent wasn't good at her work. It was that she was clueless as to what she was really looking for and it wasn't something he could tell her.

Skimming the article, Jane quirked a brow realizing he may have found exaely what he was looking for: the missing piece. Flipping to the second page his eyes landed on the photograph as the pieces immediately fell into place. Pushing up from the desk, he stood frozen at the sound of a throat clearing in the doorway. Motioning the team through the door, he watched Cho close the door behind them as he glanced at his watch. Exactly fifteen minutes had passed since he'd left for Lisbon's office.

"This is where she's being held." Jane said with conviction at he shoved the copy of a very old news article in Cho's direction. "I recognize the wallpaper from the videos."

The look on Cho's face said he recognized it as well.

"It's time to go to Bertram and get things rolling." Cho set the paper back on the desk.

"Yes, it is; but, while I know it isn't necessary, remind him no locals." Jane said already knowing the score on that. "Volker undoubtedly has the local PD in his back pocket. His family's been in the area too long for it to be otherwise."

Sitting back down, Jane steepled his fingers as he watched the team disband to go about their business. While he wasn't sure what Van Pelt and Rigsby were doing for the foreseeable future beyond waiting for further instructions from their Team Leader, Cho was going to be locked away in Bertam's office discussing things they didn't want anyone to hear. Rising to his feet and grabbing his jacket off the back of Lisbon's chair, Jane meandered into the hall fully intent on joining them.

He had to make sure they weren't planning anything stupid.

A few minutes later, Jane was glad he'd crashed the big Boss's party and forced his way in. They _were_ planning something stupid considering it was Volker they were dealing with. Quickly setting Bertram and the Tactical Leader straight on several points, Jane got them to sit back and listen to him. By the time the pissing contests were over a couple of hours later, they had the genesis of a workable plan.

They would attack from the air over the copse of trees surrounding the property between twelve and six a.m. That was the time frame Jane could confidently confirm he'd never received a live stream video. He figured Volker was either conducting business or sleeping. Either way, he wouldn't be expecting hell to descend from the skies.

###

Countless hours later from his safe perch near the SUVs, Jane shook his head in disbelief that none of this had gone down like they showed on television. Or like anything he'd ever seen in real life and he'd gone through through several hostage situations. Not that he'd expected it to. Everything had happened much too fast. He wasn't sure even he had cataloged more than black helicopters coming out of nowhere and black clad figures swarming everywhere. They hadn't been able to lob those canisters of gas always flying in the action flicks as the grating on the windows had deflected any such action. He thought they had managed to drop a canister or two down the chimneys; but, he wasn't sure. All that really mattered was the rats had abandoned ship as he'd expected and been quickly arrested. Surprisingly, Volker had had twelve men guarding his parameters. Far more than they'd anticipated.

Fortunately, the guards had allowed themselves to become complacent over the last few days of inactivity.

By the time they'd realized something was going down, it was too late to stop the attack already begun.

Watching the second wave of black clad officers swarming through the front door, Jane couldn't help thinking Volker's paternal great-grandfather had had more money than sense. Who the hell built a mini-mansion in the middle of the sticks and called it a hunting lodge? Jane answered his silent question: Powerful business Moguls intent on leaving their mark on Society back in the Gilded Age like the Volker men.

Looking around him and quickly realizing Van Pelt and Rigsby were long gone having joined the teams searching the house for evidence and stragglers, Jane scanned the officers milling about for any sign of Cho. Their trusty Team Leader was over by the SUV with Volker handcuffed in the back discussing goodness only knew what with one of the FBI liaisons. Oh, and wiping the blood off the cut on his brow with a handkerchief.

Or maybe it wasn't from the cut on _his_ brow as the wound wasn't that bad.

Maybe it was Volker's blood left over from their first run in. The one where Tommy had resisted arrest when they'd caught him trying to sneak out the basement doors at the back of the house. He'd foolishly tried to make a break for it _through_ a certain Korean Agent and learned resistance was futile when said Agent was beating his face into the ground. Fortunately, Cho had regained his self-control before it was too late and he hadn't killed the man.

Not that anyone would have protested if he had.

Realizing no one was paying any attention to him, Jane made his way up the steps and through the front door ignoring Cho's exasperated "Jane!" ringing through the air.

Frankly, he couldn't care less whether the whole house was secured or not. He had a pistol tucked neatly in his jacket pocket and unlike times past, he knew how to use it. Let the S.W.A.T. Team ferret out the rest of Volker's men like a bunch of rats in hiding. He had more important things to do.

He was getting Lisbon out of here and he was getting her out now. Come Armageddon. He didn't really care.

Running down a hall much too familiar from noxious videos, Jane counted doors before stopping front of one. As smart as he was, Volker was still a fool a hundred times over. Only a jackass would send live stream detailed enough he could identify the exact room Lisbon was being held in without even trying. Maybe fool wasn't quite the right word. Narcissistic sexual sadist with visions of grandeur was more like it.

Given recent events, Tommy was learning he wasn't quite as omnipotent as he thought and that was the part making him truly stupid.

He should have figured that one out after the first go around.

Lisbon would be in a lot better shape if he had.

Knocking on the door and calling Lisbon's name, Jane listened for any response from within. Hearing nothing and thinking the worst possible thoughts, he slowly opened the door. He didn't have a choice. He had to move fast. The time for pussy footing was long gone. It was only a matter of time before the room was swarming with testosterone driven law enforcement officers. Very male officers not nearly as sensitive to Lisbon's circumstance as they should be.

It didn't matter that Senior Agent Teresa Lisbon was one of their own. That she knew the score and what had to be done. _He_ understood what they didn't. She was a woman and women saw things differently.

Even women cops.

So, he was heading disaster off at the pass by getting to her first. Lisbon had been through enough without adding insult to injury, unintended or not.

Looking into the darkened room and seeing nothing, Jane's thoughts raced full speed ahead. Volker hadn't had time to do anything with Lisbon once he was under the attack he hadn't seen coming as those helicopters had dropped from the sky without warning. He'd been too busy trying to get out of there. He, nor his men, had gotten very far.

Pushing slowly into the room as he wouldn't put it past Lisbon to have gotten her hands on a weapon at some point since the carnage began, Jane had no intentions of getting shot for his trouble. Continuing to call out her name, he made his way towards the far side of the bed moving slowly. He wasn't taking any chances on startling her as he had no clue how Lisbon was going to react to seeing _him._

Forget the rest of _them._

Jane hoped all right given he'd been the one she'd cried out to a few short hours ago when she thought no one was listening. She was wrong. He'd been listening from the start. Volker made sure he had front row seats for every despicable moment burned permanently into his brain.

The monster had to know what his impotence was doing to him.

That he was slowly going out of his mind while appearing shockingly sane to the casual observer.

Lisbon's team had known better.

He'd heard Rigsby's "seriously scary shit" comment more than once and known he was right. Jane knew it was a good thing Volker was captured by the first wave of S.W.A.T. storming the house. Had he gotten his hands on him first, there wouldn't be enough left of the man to put in a small pine box. As it was, old Tommy had somehow broken free from the Feebs and made a run for with Rigsby and Cho in hot pursuit.

At his last sight of Volker, he'd been crammed in the back of a police car after being brought to ground a second time by Cho who'd barely been restrained from killing him yet again by Rigsby and another man. Actually, Volker may have been being crammed into the back of an ambulance after being securely cuffed to a gurney. That might have been one of his minions sitting in the back of the police car. He hadn't been paying that much attention as he'd been preoccupied at the time with finding just the right moment to make a break of his own.

Walking around the bloody bed, Jane followed the trail into the bathroom not all that surprised to find Lisbon hiding in her favorite place. Not that between the cabinet and the toilet was much of a hiding place, but the fit was tight and she obviously felt less exposed than she did in the open. Moving slowly, Jane crossed the room towards Lisbon realizing his voice probably hadn't penetrated the protective cocoon she'd drawn herself into.

"Lisbon."

Squatting, Jane reached out to run his fingers through her hair glad to see her dark head rise at the sound of his voice.

"Jane."

Not prepared for the sudden launch against his chest, Jane found himself suddenly flat on his butt on hard stone tiles with an arm full of trembling Lisbon.

"It took us this long to find you."

Jane answered the question she would never ask.

Feeling her nod against his chest as though getting confirmation of what she'd already known, Jane lifted trembling fingers to his lips before gently tucking her hand back against her lap.

"I'm getting you out of here, Teresa; but, Van Pelt needs to come in." Jane carefully informed her as he'd caught a flash of Grace's red hair in the bedroom and the faint sounds of a camera going off. Evidently they'd wrapped up catching the last of Volker's men and moved on to other things. "She's taking the crime scene photographs."

Jane didn't need to feel her stiffen in his arms to cringe at his words.

"Not Grace." Lisbon reluctantly agreed. "Cho. He'll handle it better."

"Are you sure about that?" Jane gently caressed her hair from her cheek happy she wasn't pulling away as time passed and she became more aware of what was going down.

"I'm sure." Lisbon said. "I don't have to like it…Just get it done."

"Good girl." No response was necessary as he called out to Van Pelt shielding Lisbon with his body. "Grace, send Cho in here with the camera."

"Boss?" Van Pelt's voice came from the doorway seeking confirmation as she deliberately refused to look into the bathroom.

"What he said." Lisbon said knowing her Agent would do exactly as she was told.

"Cho's out front supervising the operation so it'll take a few minutes for him to get in here." Jane held Lisbon a little tighter when she started to slip out of his arms.

"He knows doesn't he?" Lisbon asked the one question Jane was dreading most.

"A little bit." Jane admitted.

"Oh, God, how much?" Lisbon asked.

"Nothing after the first video." Jane decided to lie trusting that Lisbon would never learn the truth.

"Oh, God." Lisbon buried her face against his shoulder realizing Cho had seen her all but naked.

"Lisbon, stop it." Jane resisted the urge to shake her as she whispered the words out loud. "None of that is important now. If he hadn't seen you then, he's certainly going to see you now." He gently reminded her before things got out of hand satisfied when she nodded her head in agreement. "You're going to be okay with this?"

"I don't have a choice."

Like it or not, Jane agreed with her. They didn't have a choice. Not if they wanted to see Volker sent away for a very long time.

Hearing footsteps behind him, Jane turned his head to speak to the Agent standing in the doorway over his shoulder.

"Cho, we aren't staying a second longer than we have to. Get your photographs now so I can take her out of here." Jane's voice clearly conveyed his fellow Agent was acting on borrowed time so he needed to just get it done and keep any personal feelings out of it.

Features schooled into the familiar mask, Cho stepped into the bathroom to efficiently take the photographs of his Boss he'd never wanted to take. Lisbon wasn't meant to be seen clothed this way outside of an intimate setting with the man of her choice. She was certainly never meant to be a case file. That wasn't right on any level.

Mentally backtracking and giving himself an imaginary head slap, Cho decided under the circumstances he was glad to take the unsavory photographs. Doing so meant the Boss was alive and that was all any of them had ever wanted. Alive and fighting if the words she was having with Jane were any indication.

"Jane, I'm okay." Lisbon mumbled reassuringly as she closed her eyes against the camera clicking away taking hard copy pictures of her mostly nude form.

As much as she hated what Cho was doing, it had to be done.

Jane would have covered her long ago otherwise.

He would never leave her exposed like this.

His first instinct was always to protect her.

Even on those occasions when she didn't want to be protected.

But, Jane couldn't protect her now as much as he was fighting the desire to shield her. Not when they needed all the proof of Volker's crimes they could get. Not when Cho had to document every indignity and every injury marring her flesh to keep the monster in his cage. Neither she nor Jane had a choice. Not if they wanted to keep Volker from coming after her again.

"Yes, you are." Jane agreed knowing that while that was far from true, he'd say what needed to be said to get her through the next few hours. "You're okay."

Catching Cho's signal he was done, Jane removed his jacket before helping Lisbon slide her arms through the sleeves. Gently fastening the buttons, he scooped her up off the floor. Much stronger than he looked, Jane had already decided, as she'd carried him a time or two over the years, he was returning the favor. It was obvious Lisbon didn't feel much like walking. He wasn't sure she could if she tried. He certainly didn't mind holding her as close as possible. He merely wished it was under more pleasant circumstances.

Carrying her into the bedroom, Jane wasn't surprised to see the full team loitering about expectantly.

"We aren't handing Lisbon over to the EMT's." From the look on her team's faces, they agreed with him there and they'd fight any resistance to their plan. "Grace can drive us into town while you two take care of wrapping this up. You can meet us at the hospital when it's done."

Looking at their faces, Jane was under no illusion Rigsby or Cho would stay put once Volker was safely transported to lock down and the crime scene analyzed.

They'd be at the hospital as soon as they were free.

"Oh, and before I forget, we need to get the keys out of that bastard's pocket to unlock this thing." Jane tipped his head in the direction of the collar still adorning Lisbon's neck.

There were other ways to unlock it; but, they didn't have the electronic pass code, nor was Volker likely to share it, so the key would have to do.

"Already done." Cho extended his hand and dropped the keys onto Jane's waiting palm.

Watching him unlock the nasty piece of plastic and toss it on the bed, the team couldn't ignore the livid burn on Lisbon's neck. It was one more thing Volker was paying for. They'd make sure of that one way or another.

"Cho, clear the way." Jane said. "Lisbon doesn't need to deal with any of that."

He couldn't stop the other officers from looking as they walked by; but, he could certainly insure they didn't say anything untoward. Not that he thought Lisbon would notice. She seemed to have finally permitted herself to drift into unconsciousness. But, he wasn't taking any chances. Listening intently for a few moments, Jane decided he wasn't all that worried about her condition right now given her pulse was regular and her breathing even.

Following Cho out the front door and down the steps a few moments later, Jane could feel eyes upon them and knew what the Agents were seeing. A man holding his Boss much too close and in a way that was far from professional. Screw all of that. If things went his way in the not too distant future, the truth would come out eventually. For now, let them talk. It was nothing but rumors and suppositions. Smoke and mirrors and, as Jane well knew, illusions could only hurt you if you let them.

He was more concerned with the cuts and bruises darkening her skin. Lisbon shouldn't have done what she'd taken to doing the last two or three days. She should never have let the monster know how she truly felt. It had only made Volker hurt her more. But, it had also bought them a few more days to find her and delayed her appointment with Volker's torture chamber.

Climbing through the SUV door Cho opened with Lisbon in his arms, Jane could only applaud her strength and lament such resistance had ever been necessary.


	8. Chapter 7

Tina and Guests, your reviews are greatly appreciated. ~Calla

###

Looking up from the hand he was rubbing, Jane realized Van Pelt had stopped their vehicle in front of the Emergency Room entrance. Not waiting for her to exit the SUV, Jane opened the door and got out with Lisbon in his arms. Walking through the sliding glass with Grace at his heels, he ignored the immediate ripple going throough the small town Waiting Room already filled near to capacity. The patients-in-waiting clearly weren't used to seeing roughed up, mostly naked ladies being regretfully paraded through their space.

A similar sight would be nothing new back home in Sacramento.

Seeing their reaction, Jane wondered briefly if the hospital was capable of dealing with Lisbon's situation before dismissing the thought as overprotective. The town wasn't _that_ small having nearly 50,000 people. He was sure they had a competent medical staff manning the spanking new multi-storied hospital he was currently standing in. He'd have to take that chance.

Ignoring Van Pelt's conversation with the nurse who'd rapidly approached them, Jane followed the woman through the door suddenly opening to allow them passage into the hall beyond. In a matter of moments he found himself laying Lisbon on a narrow hospital bed in a small private room. Watching the nurse remove a hospital gown from a drawer and place it on the counter, Jane walked over to carry the folded square back to the bed not all that surprised to find Lisbon watching his every move.

"We need to get you out of my jacket and into this." Jane said quietly as he felt her hand tighten on his. "Are you okay with me helping you or would you rather have the nurse or Van Pelt do it?"

"You." Lisbon gripped his hand even tighter knowing she couldn't contemplate being touched by a stranger and Van Pelt was out of the question.

The woman was a subordinant and a friend.

Van Pelt could never see her this way.

Lisbon wouldn't allow it.

"Give us about fifteen minutes." Jane dismissed the nurse daring her to protest his command with a look.

Hearing the door click behind the woman who'd wisely chosen to leave, he unfolded the gown and draped it around Lisbon beneath his jacket. As much as he'd love to get a closer look at her injuries, he would do no such thing. He'd find out all of that soon enough. Fastening a single snap at the back of her neck instead, Jane helped Lisbon slide her arms out of his jacket as he held the garment in place around her shoulders. A few awkward movements and loud gasps later, he knew she'd slipped into the gown that was much too large.

Judging by the bruises he'd seen in Volker's bedroom and the sounds she'd been making, he'd bet she had a cracked rib or two as she already knew. Not that she'd admit it yet. Lisbon was too tough for her own good. Lifting his jacket from around her shoulders, Jane draped it over the only chair in the room before discretely fastening the rest of the snaps down her back. Stepping back, he watched Lisbon settle back in the bed and close her eyes.

Something as simple as changing clothes had taken everything out of her. Fortunately, Van Pelt had already taken care of explaining what had happened so Lisbon was spared repeating or hearing any of _that_. But, the worst was yet to come. She have to get through being poked, prodded, and intimately examined by strangers. She wasn't going to handle that well.

Rolling the single chair over by her bed, Jane sat down and took her hand pleased to get a snuffle in response. Over the past couple of minutes, Lisbon had fallen asleep. The kind of deep, natural, healing sleep she needed for as long as it lasted. He wasn't going to get that nurse as he'd promised. He was letting Lisbon rest instead. The woman would be back to check on her patient soon enough. If not her, the doctor would.

Gently stroking her hair, Jane decided he was going to stay this room through the unpleasantness to come. Either right here beside her or right outside that curtain they'd close between them verbally holding her hand in the more intimate moments he wasn't allowed to share.

No matter what the doctors wanted, he was standing his ground.

He wouldn't leave even if they tried to make him.

They could get any such thoughts out of their head.

###

Frustrated with having spent the past three days banished to a Waiting Room, Jane had decided it was time to fight back. The only reason he'd cooperated this long was he'd known Lisbon had enough drugs in her system to down an elephant. He'd sneaked a peak at her chart when no one was looking and gotten away with it. He was willing to accept the status quo for the time being. To let Lisbon rest and her physical injuries heal. However, he'd gotten wind yesterday that they were slowly weaning her off the drugs and that changed everything. He was getting in that room and he was getting in there today. Before anything untoward happened.

Before Lisbon's memories came flooding back.

Rounding the corner yet again, Jane was pleased to see Lisbon's tall, vicious guard dog had stepped away from the Nurse's Station. He'd spent the past fifteen minutes evading her and it hadn't been pretty. She'd known exactly which room he was making that beeline for and done everything in her power to thwart his plans. He'd spent the past five minutes hiding out in the stairwell for just that reason.

If Rigsby thought "Sane Jane" was "seriously scary shit," he hadn't seen Nurse Freda.

Deciding the coast was clear for the moment, Jane ducked easily into the room across the hall ignoring the brightly colored sheet of paper affixed to the door.

Breathing a sigh of relief, he awaited the response of the room's only occupant to his mostly silent invasion.

"Jane." Lisbon didn't bother opening her eyes as she knew who was crashing her party uninvited.

"You're awake." Jane walked over to stand by her bed.

"Yeah, I am, and you're not supposed to be in here." Lisbon stated firmly as she'd requested a "No Visitors" status on her file and knew there was a matching sign to that affect on her door.

"Since when has that ever stopped me?" Jane responded exactly as expected as he continued to mess with the bouquet of brightly colored flowers.

Opening her eyes, Lisbon snorted in disbelief. Only Jane would attempt sneaking into her room unnoticed carrying an armload of flowers bigger than he was and actually pull it off. The man was too much. He honestly was. She didn't know whether to laugh or seriously kick his ass if either action wouldn't hurt so badly.

Turning her attention to the flowers, she realized immediately that the bold, beautiful arrangement was much too large to have come from a grocery store. He had to have handpicked those stems from some upscale florist similar to that _really_ expensive boutique shop down the block from the CBI. The one he'd been known to frequent occasionally when he was trying to win back her favor after he'd done something really, really stupid. While she'd secretly appreciated the gesture as she wasn't the kind of chick guys normally gave flowers to, she hadn't cut him any visible slack. As for the bouquet at hand, Jane had probably created it with specific meanings in mind. The man was a mentalist. Almost everything in his universe was a game within a game. Or so much more than it seemed at the least. Eventually, she'd find out what he was trying to tell her.

Later.

When she felt ready to hear what he needed to say.

"Never." Lisbon's eyes drifted closed only to be forced open again. "How long have I been in here?"

It was probably much longer than she thought from the look and feel of things.

She had that seriously doped feel and her mind was fuzzy like cotton.

"It'll be four days in six hours." Jane responded as he pulled a chair up beside her bed convinced Lisbon was going to allow him to stay in spite of the "No Visitors" order displayed so blatantly on her door.

She had that look about her.

The one saying she was capitulating to his will.

Sitting down, Jane found comfort in Lisbon's response to his nearness. In the fact she hadn't pulled away or shown instinctive fear at his presence. He'd have left if she had. He didn't intend adding to her pain.

And though he was willing to take a chance, he'd been clueless about the reception he was going to get. He'd spent the past three days pacing the Waiting Room down the hall. Lisbon had spent the past three days in here with her memories. When that "No Visitors" sign appeared on her door, he'd expected the worse.

"I wasn't in here the first night." The room had looked different with less privacy and more machines.

"You were in ICU overnight until the doctors were satisfied your vitals were stabilized and there weren't any nasty internal injuries we knew nothing about. They moved you in here a couple of days ago. You opened your eyes long enough to tell them to leave you alone and went back under." He'd been watching from the door.

"There's more to it than that." Lisbon said quietly through the hazy memories flooding her mind.

"No, there isn't." Jane firmly corrected her.

"Yes, Patrick, there is." Lisbon said in a tone much like she'd used with him the first time she'd called him "Mr. Jane" a lifetime ago. A tone he clearly didn't like. "Either tell me what happened or I'll have to go by the visions in my head."

"Are you sure you want to know?" Jane asked as he reached out to take her hand.

"There was a doctor who reminded me of Volker…." Lisbon said quietly.

"Yes, there was. I'd requested female physicians in no uncertain terms; but, the fools didn't listen to me." Jane said scathingly. "Once I told them what Volker hadn't done, they ignored what he had, and brought Jamieson in…You didn't handle it well, Teresa. It took me almost three hours to calm you down. After that, they drugged you to oblivion and sent me away. While I haven't been able to see you since, I do know your doctors are all women now."

"I lost it." Lisbon cringed at the memories flooding her mind.

She'd taken one look at the handsome doctor reminding her too much of her tormentor and acted on instinct. She hadn't cared there was a very female nurse accompanying him. She'd ripped the i.v. out of her hand and gone to ground between her bed and the rolling metal cabinet beside it. She hadn't even felt the agony in her ribs until it was too late. Until she was curled in a ball with her eyes tightly closed listening to Jane firmly demanding the shocked doctor "Go!" She was clueless how long it had taken Jane to talk her back into that bed. What she did know was she hadn't let him go until she'd finally succumbed to whatever was in the i.v. they'd managed to stick in her other hand.

"It wasn't your fault." Jane gently massaged her bruised hand pleased she wasn't pulling away. "No man should have tried to treat you after what you'd been through. They admitted as much after the fact."

"Still." Lisbon said unnecessarily.

"Stop it, Teresa, you aren't invincible." Jane reminded her.

"Tell me what happened the last three days." Lisbon asked. "I can't remember much of anything after you carried me out of that place." Except her violent reaction to the very pleasant doctor who should have never tried to check her cracked ribs and bruises.

"You passed out while Van Pelt was driving us to the hospital." Jane moved his chair a little closer to Lisbon's bed pleased when she moved a little closer to the edge in response. "I carried you into the Emergency Room and gave them the Cliff Notes Version of what had happened to you. Only Grace's CBI badge stopped them from calling me in for domestic abuse.

After that, we spent quite a few hours in a tiny curtain enclosed cell while you were being stabilized. They moved you into ICU about eight, no ten, hours after we got here. About an hour after that, Dr. Jamieson barreled in and all hell broke loose. As soon as they got that I.V. into you, I was kicked to the curb. Banished to the waiting room in the name of your getting some much needed rest. The next day they moved you into a regular room and the "No Visitors" sign came up. I'm assuming that was at your insistence. You know the rest.

Oh, except that Cho called your brothers to let them know you were okay and that you'd call them when you were ready to talk. They understood." Jane finished softly. "I'd say they'll be waiting for that call when it comes."

"You talked to Tommy didn't you?" Lisbon asked quietly.

"I reassured him you would be okay." Jane admitted. "While I couldn't tell them much for obvious reasons, I did keep your brothers in the loop from day one."

"Thank you." Lisbon squeezed his hand.

"You're welcome." Jane squeezed her hand back. "Your brother's a good man. Neither he nor Annie need to be worrying unnecessarily."

"Yeah, he is." Lisbon agreed. "Volker?"

She hoped he was dead; but, knew he wasn't. She wouldn't be that lucky. Besides, it would look bad on the department if he was killed in the course of apprehension even if their actions were clearly justified. The Court of Public Opinion could be brutal and far less reality based than a jury trial. She'd seen that over and over again.

"In a jail cell he's never going to leave." Jane resisted the urge to get closer deciding he was pushing his luck in holding her hand and knowing he was totally unsure how Lisbon would feel about such a thing. From what he'd been told at the Nurse's Station, she was skittish around men with good cause. Well, most men. She'd not been that way with him yet; but, that could change at any moment. As coherent as she was, Lisbon still wasn't fully awake. "Actually, he may still be in the infirmary. Cho got fairly rough with him."

They'd had to pull the Korean Agent off of Volker before he'd done too much damage. The man had gotten away from the local PD officers and made a run for the woods. If he'd gotten that far, he might have escaped to threaten Lisbon again. Unlike them, Old Tommy knew the lay of the land for miles around having spent much of his childhood here. Fortunately, Cho had stopped him and Volker had been stupid enough to resist. He hadn't done anything he hadn't had to do to restrain his perp. Not really. That was their story and they were sticking to it.

"Good." Knowing what Cho was capable of doing in a few brief moments brought a hint of a smile to Lisbon's face and wiped the last of the cobwebs from her mind.

"That's what I said." Jane agreed immediately noting the change in Lisbon's demeanor.

"How much did you see?" Lisbon glanced at Jane briefly before turning away deciding now was as good as any to confront realities she'd rather ignore.

"Enough to know what was going on from day one." She didn't need to hear the truth until she was ready.

"How much did Cho and the rest of the team see?" Refusing to open her eyes, Lisbon forced the question from between her lips.

"Nothing after Volker undressed you." Jane reluctantly admitted. "Only Cho saw that much."

Well, maybe a little more. He'd seen her getting choked; but, what Lisbon didn't know wouldn't hurt her. And, she'd never know that part. He had Cho's promise.

"Oh, God." Lisbon's fists curled in the blanket covering her.

"Hey, I didn't have a choice." Against his better judgment, Jane sat on the edge of her bed gently pulling Lisbon into his arms and feeling grateful she didn't jerk away. "I didn't let him see the worst of it, I give you word. Just enough to know you were alive and fighting. Enough to get the team off my back about suppressing evidence they thought they needed.

Cho backed my decision. He knew I would share any information pertinent to helping us find your location."

Jane was surprised to feel Lisbon's arms wrapping around him as she pressed her face against his shirt. He hadn't been sure how she'd receive him since that "No Visitors" sign appeared on her door. Besides, moving like that had to hurt like hell; but, she obviously needed his touch more than ending the pain. Carefully shifting their positions, Jane arranged her more comfortably against him ignoring the tears against his skin. A certain brunette wouldn't appreciate him drawing attention to her weaknesses.

"How much did you really see?" Her strained voice was much too soft as Lisbon repeated her question yet again.

"More than I ever wanted to." Jane reluctantly admitted knowing the rubber had hit the road. "If I had to guess, I'd say all of it."

Resting his chin atop her head, he rubbed Lisbon's back soothingly.

"Sick bastard that he is, Volker made sure he got double the pleasure for his efforts and I'm going to make sure he's paid back in kind for his trouble." Jane promised her.

"You can't touch him now that he's in the legal system." Lisbon stated the obvious.

"Volker won't be in solitary forever. Let's just say that I have any number of old "friends" on the inside owing me a favor or two. And while I can't tell them acceptable forms of repayment, I'm sure they'll figure something out…especially with a pretty boy like Tommy Volker." Jane debated the wisdom of telling her as much as he was. "But, as an officer of the law, you don't need to know about any of that." Jane kissed the top of her head knowing he'd already set that ball in motion.

Volker had a welcoming committee waiting for him when the time was right and he couldn't find it in himself to feel bad about it. He wasn't responsible for anything that went down. He hadn't done anything to cause it. Well, nothing beyond visiting a few of the "friends" he'd made over the course of his incarceration for killing Carter and letting drop it was Lisbon that Volker had tortured.

Jane knew how their minds worked and he was counting on this. While not that fond of cops in general, Teresa Lisbon was a different matter. She was his partner. He held her in highest esteem. In fact, his companions hadn't missed how he really felt about the woman. If that wasn't enough, the petite brunette had shown her undying loyalty to him all through the case no matter how it looked to the higher ups. That kind of faithfulness counted for a lot among the boys.

They'd see that Lisbon's pain was avenged without him doing or saying another thing.

"I didn't hear a thing." Lisbon agreed deciding Volker deserved whatever he got.

She wasn't going to feel guilty over anything. She might feel differently down the road; but, she didn't right now. Not when she couldn't get the things he'd done to her out of her head. Not when she was feeling the pain of his touch as acutely now as she had when he was hurting her. Not when she was waking from horrific nightmares trembling in cold sweats crying out for him to stop. At the moment she couldn't find herself caring what happened to that particular monster in his cage.

Suddenly aware of where she was and how firmly Jane was clutching her against him without causing an unbearable amount of pain, Lisbon was surprised at how comfortable she felt in his arms. She wasn't sure she'd ever feel this way around a man again. Not after everything she'd been through and certainly not so soon.

Then again, it was Jane who was holding her. Perhaps it wasn't so surprising she felt at ease. He'd earned her trust over the years. He'd never hurt her as Volker had. He'd killed to keep her safe. He was…He was Jane. If that wasn't enough, they'd been each other's safe haven from the storms for more years than she cared to recall.

"Mr. Jane, I told you there are no visitors allowed." Jane found himself staring down the same eagle eyed nurse it had taken him a quarter hour to evade to get into Lisbon's room in the first place.

"I believe your patient feels differently." Jane didn't need to motion to the woman in his arms as Lisbon was making her decision clear.

"Jane stays." Lisbon stated in her best Senior Agent voice.

"The notice on the door clearly says no visitors." The nurse repeated refusing to back down.

"At my request." Lisbon reminded her. "I changed my mind where Jane is concerned."

"Your doctors' aren't going to be pleased." The nurse tried again. "You need your rest."

"He's helping me rest." Lisbon felt Jane shifting yet again as he lifted his legs settling in her bed to stay. "Now go away."

Watching the door close, she stretched out against his chest curling into her Jane pillow as he kept one arm lightly encircling her protectively and the other behind his head. Feeling her cheek against his vest, Lisbon was surprised she hadn't noticed him shucking his jacket. She must have been too deeply lost in her thoughts.

"Go to sleep, Teresa." Jane watched her eyes flicker. "She's right, you know. Three days isn't nearly long enough and you haven't been sleeping well. As I'm not going anywhere, I'll see that you're perfectly safe. You can close your eyes."

"For how long?" Lisbon was surprised at the words coming out of her mouth and the fear in her soul.

"As long as you'll let me." Jane carefully ran his hand over back. "None of this changes a thing. We're still going to have that talk when you're ready."

"I'd like that." That wasn't as hard to admit as she'd thought it would be.

Just because she wasn't yet ready, and didn't know when she would be, didn't mean she didn't want to have that talk in the not too distant future.

Thinking of Jane had gotten her through the worst of it.

Being with Jane would get her through what was to come.

"So would I." Jane kissed her hair. "Now go to sleep. I'm not going anywhere."

"In a little bit." She'd just fought her way out of a drug induced haze and she wasn't quite ready to go under again. Not until she got some much needed answers. "When do you think I can get out of here?"

"They're not letting you go any time soon." He might as well get the part she wasn't going to like out of the way.

"Maybe that's for the best." Lisbon agreed closing her eyes against the feel of him gently brushing a wayward lock from her cheek.

"Maybe it is." He hadn't expected her to accept so easily.

If the doctor's hadn't told him she was holding her own in every way, he'd be far more concerned than he was. Lisbon didn't like hospitals and she usually refused to stay. That she was accepting her forced stay without a fight screamed something was definitely wrong.

"Bertram had a CBI psychiatrist in here before I'd had time to open my eyes this morning." Lisbon suddenly spat the words into the ether with a stormy look on her face. "You know how I feel about that."

"Do I need to ask how your session went?" Jane gripped her hand in his.

"How do you think?" Lisbon asked.

"Not very well." Jane agreed. "Teresa, you need to talk about this. If you don't, you'll never pass your psych eval."

If she didn't, Lisbon could kiss her job at the CBI good-bye and that wasn't what she wanted to happen.

Even with what she'd just gone through.

"Not with a sanctimonious know-it-all who said how disappointed she was that I wasn't the hysterical mass of tears she expected me to be." Lisbon said stubbornly. "Besides, we both know anything I shared with that woman would have gone from my mouth straight to Bertram's ears. Patient-Doctor confidentiality doesn't apply in a situation like this even if they say it does."

Lisbon's tone clearly expressed what she'd gone through wasn't anyone's business but her own.

"Then discuss it with me." Jane said gently. "I already know everything you went through."

"And you look like hell for it." Lisbon observed not sure how she felt about his comment. While she trusted Jane more than anyone, she didn't really feel she could add to his burden. What if he hadn't seen everything? What if he only thought he had? Not that it really mattered either way. He'd clearly seen enough. "How much _did_ you see?"

"Lisbon, I'm pretty sure I saw it all." Jane repeated dreading what was coming next.

"Tell me." Lisbon threaded her fingers through his.

"Reliving your torment isn't necessary for either of us." Jane reacted exactly as she expected.

"It is if you want me to talk to you." Lisbon's voice was firm.

"What do you want me to say?" Jane asked.

"The truth." Lisbon repeated.

"I saw what he did to you, Lisbon, and I saw your reaction." Jane admitted. "I say him kiss you and touch you in ways no man should without your permission. I saw him do despicably intimate things you didn't want done. I saw your reaction to things you couldn't change. I think I can safely assure you that I saw it all. I saw it all and it doesn't change how I feel about you. That's all you need to know."

"I thought about you." Lisbon saw no reason to deny to truth. "And I knew you were out here waiting from me and working to set me free."

"You were right." Jane confirmed.

"I hoped I was." Lisbon's voice was muffled against his chest. "And that what was happening to me wouldn't change what was happening between us."

"It changes everything, Teresa. You can't pretend it doesn't; but, that doesn't mean we're not going to be an 'us' eventually. It simply changes the dynamics of how we'll get where we're going." Jane corrected her. "You have to realize interruptions can't change what's meant be? And surely you know, when it comes to getting what I want, I can be a very patient man."

Lisbon snorted at the ridiculousness of his words. Jane was hardly a patient man once he'd made up his mind. Determined was more like it. Patient, not so much; but, in her case he clearly wanted to be.

"I want you. That hasn't changed and it never will. I'll wait as long as it takes to get your head on straight." Jane said quietly knowing he'd waited pretty darned close to a decade all ready. Those years counted, even when he hadn't known what he was waiting for. What were a few more months or even a year or two? Lisbon was much too strong not to come out of this.

"I hoped you would." Lisbon said.

"You knew I would." Jane kissed her temple.

"Maybe." Lisbon before whispering a truth he might never want to hear. "I imagined it was you touching me."

"What?" Jane asked not sure he was hearing right.

"I imagined it was you touching me." Lisbon repeated.

Jane didn't pretend to misunderstand what she was intimating and he wasn't sure how he felt about hearing her admit what he already knew.

"I'd have gone insane if I hadn't; but, I'm sorry I used you that way." Lisbon apologized softly.

"Don't be." Jane kissed her hair. "I certainly don't begrudge your using me any way you needed to get back to me." Even _that_. "And surely you know by now that I fully intend to make love to you as soon as you're ready to be touched again? And once I start, I never intend to stop."

"I'd like that." Lisbon agreed.

She would when they were _both_ ready to take such a step.

She wasn't the only one needing time. Lisbon wasn't so wrapped up in her trauma she didn't realize the toll their shared experiences had taken on Jane. That he was willing to stay by her side after all that he'd seen was a testament to the feelings neither of them had yet to acknowledge in any overt way.

"Lisbon?" Jane asked.

"Jane?" Lisbon answered his question with a question.

"I knew what you were doing." Jane admitted knowing the truth could back fire in horrible ways.

"What?" Lisbon was clearly taken aback.

"You had a habit of calling out my name at the pivotal moment." Jane whispered against her ear.

"Oh, God." She hadn't remembered that; but, she had no doubts she had.

It was part of the reason Volker had taken to beating her the last few days. He hadn't liked that she'd been retreating inside her head. That she'd been pretending him away. Frankly, she hadn't cared. At that point, she'd been willing to do whatever it took to maintain her sanity. Even if that meant using Jane in ways he'd probably view with shock and disgust. Then again, after that night at _Trevor's_, perhaps it wouldn't. She'd had a feeling they'd both been fantasizing forbidden passions for quite a few years.

"It's okay, Teresa, while I'm certainly not happy about the circumstances, I'm glad I was able to help you through that nightmare." Jane reassured her. "And I can assure you I've had more than my fair share of fantasies of a similar nature over the years."

"Yeah?" Lisbon smiled weakly at the verification she'd been right.

"Oh, yeah." Jane agreed.

"Then what were you thinking when I fell apart afterwards?" Lisbon asked the question suddenly flooding her mind.

"That the fantasy was over and reality had finally kicked in." Jane answered honestly. "That you were suddenly cognizant that it wasn't my touch you'd responded to."

"You were right." Lisbon felt Jane's arms tighten around her as she began to shake as the memories flooded her mind. "Volker made sure I knew it was him doing that to me before he was done."

"I saw all of that, too." Jane gently reminded her. "It doesn't matter anymore…Whatever you imagined…experienced…we'll wipe away one day." Jane tilted her head to lightly brush his lips across hers. "I give you my word."

He'd make sure of it.

"New memories to replace the old?" Lisbon wasn't all that surprised by the conviction in her words.

While she still wasn't handling the presence of her male physicians all that well and had no desire to see Rigsby or Cho at the moment, she had no such qualms about Jane. He'd made no move to leave and she didn't want him too. Lisbon was sure she'd beg him to stay if he tried. She felt safe in his presence in ways she didn't alone.

"New memories to replace the old." Jane agreed. "Now, as I've already said, close your eyes and sleep. You need your rest and I'm not going anywhere."

No matter how hard they might try to evict him.

Jane had every intention of enjoying holding Lisbon while he could.

While she was still pleasantly drugged and certain realities hadn't yet set in.

He had every idea the worst was yet to come.

###

He got a taste of that two days later when the last of the drugs had finally leached from her system.

Hanging out in the hotel room with the rest of the team while they did the last of the paperwork on Lisbon's case, Jane was surprised when his phone rang. Glancing at the unknown number, he contemplated letting it go to voice mail before deciding it might be something important. Just because he knew the main number to the hospital didn't mean he wasn't being called from another line.

"Jane." Speaking into his cell Jane knew that, while they tried to appear otherwise involved, the team was hanging onto his every word. "It'll take me fifteen minutes to get there."

Hanging up the phone, Jane stared into expectant faces. Debating what to tell the team, he decided the truth was good enough.

"Lisbon's having nightmares and flashbacks now that they've got her off the drugs. She's not handling it well. Her doctors want me to come in and calm her down. Or they hope I can. The Psychiatrist didn't have any luck and they don't want to drug her again." Catching Cho's eye, Jane silently reassured him he'd see that Lisbon was all right. It was up to the Korean Agent to reassure the rest of his team. "I'll be back when I can. You might want to call Bertram and let him know that while you guys can be back in the office tomorrow; I'm not sure when I'll be back. I'd say not before they release Lisbon and I take her home. I'll update him after that."

"Okay." Was all Cho said before turning back to his laptop screen knowing darned well Rigsby and Van Pelt would bombard him with questions as soon as Jane closed that door behind him.

Ignoring the rest of the team, Jane left the hotel room and walked to his car. Opening the door and sliding behind the wheel, he realized he really didn't know what to say or how to help. Pulling out the parking lot Jane realized, for all he knew, his presence might make the situation worse. It hadn't yesterday or the day before; but, Lisbon had been in a different frame of mind then. She'd still had enough drugs left in her system that she was still seeing everything through a haze. Nothing had really hit her yet though it seemed it was starting to.

From what he'd been told by the nurse, Lisbon's mind was finally totally clear for the first time in nearly a week and she was beginning to relive what she'd been through with clarity.

Parking his car, Jane was lost in thought as he walked up the deserted walkway and through the sliding glass doors. Walking down the hall and turning right, he stopped at a door. Deciding not to knock, he took a moment to gather his thoughts before pushing his way into the room beyond. Taking a moment to take in the crumpled form on the bed, Jane walked over to take Lisbon in his arms hoping the while she wouldn't lose control at his touch. When she didn't fight back, he settled on the bed to hold her more comfortably against his chest enveloping her securely in the curve of his body.

"Teresa, stop it." Jane gently turned her face back towards him finding himself more than slightly dismayed by the moisture clinging to her lashes.

His Lisbon did not cry in public.

"Jane, please." Lisbon pleaded against the hand refusing to allow her to look away.

"Lisbon, stop it." Jane said firmly. "We're partners..._Partner_ partners, not just work partners, you know it. That being said, you aren't shutting me out. I won't let you."

Lisbon cut her eyes sharply to his unsure of the meaning of the words she thought she'd just heard.

"I don't know anything." She said softly.

"Yes, you do." Jane leaned forward lightly brushing his lips against hers. "We've already had this talk remember?"

She obviuosly didn't.

"Yeah?" Lisbon asked.

Jane decided there conversations from a couple of days ago weren't as clear as they ought to be which wasn't all that surprising. Lisbon had been pretty heavily drugged. More heavily than he'd thought it seemed.

"Yes." Jane smiled slightly at her hopeful tone. "I'm not going anywhere."

Though he'd prefer kissing her lips, Jane kissed her palm instead.

"I hope not." Lisbon resisted the urge to cling to the one constant she'd clung to through the nightmare.

"I'm not; but, you're going to have to talk to me as we agreed." Jane gently forced her to look at him hoping she remembered that conversation as she seemed to have forgotten others. "Let me help you through this."

"I'll try." Lisbon's voice was tired. "It's not like you don't already know what happened."

"No, it isn't." Jane agreed. "So, there's nothing you can say that will shock me or change our relationship. Nothing that will make me abandon you."

"I guess there isn't." Lisbon agreed.

"There isn't." Jane kissed her hair as he settled back in the bed much as he had yesterday with Lisbon against his chest. "Now, that being said, you've got to stop throwing your dinner tray at your attending physicians. They don't think highly of getting spaghetti in their hair."

"They sent that damned shrink in here again. The one that keeps trying to weasel my trust and force me to talk about things I don't want to discuss with her." Lisbon said.

"So you threw your dinner tray at her?" Jane asked knowing there was more to the story.

"When she asked me how I felt when Volker touched me…touched me…like…_that_." Lisbon admitted.

"In very clinical terms." Jane finished for her. "Like it happened to someone else."

"Yes." Lisbon buried her face in his neck.

"Why did that make you so angry? Dr. Ralston was only doing her job." Jane continued reasonably. "She was trying to help you."

"Because that's how it felt." Lisbon admitted. "Like I was somewhere else watching what he was doing to me like it was happening to someone else."

"That's a very normal response." Jane gently reminded her. "You know that from your training."

"When it happens to someone else." Lisbon said angrily. "Not when it happens to me."

"Yes, it is, Teresa, especially when it happens to you." Jane forced her to look at him. "Your mind disassociated from something you could no longer bear. That doesn't make you weak. It makes you a survivor willing to do whatever it took to make it. There's nothing shameful in that."

Jane found himself staring into green eyes that were much too bright.

"You really believe that?" Lisbon demanded.

"Yes, I do." Jane wiped away a tear with his thumb. "I also believe you need to cooperate with Dr. Ralston to a certain degree since she's the one who can spring you from this joint. As soon as that happens, I'll take you home."

"I'd like that." It had been over three weeks since she'd last been home.

"So would I." Jane settled her more comfortably against him pleased at how much calmer Lisbon had gotten since his arrival.

Her doctors were idiots. It wasn't nightmares or flashbacks that had set Lisbon off. It was one foolish shrink trying to force a very stubborn woman to talk when she wasn't ready. At least things hadn't been as bad as he'd feared. Not yet anyway. There was still plenty of time for things to go to hell in a hand basket once they were home.

Once she started _really_ talking to him as he was going to force her to do.

Once she started reliving everything with a clear mind over and over again.

"You'll stay for a while?" Lisbon asked. "Until I'm comfortable being alone?"

"I'll stay as long as you need me to stay." Jane said. "The couch is comfortable and there's plenty of tea. What's to complain about?"

"That it isn't your place." Lisbon closed her eyes deciding she was tired of talking.

"Your place is nicer than mine." Jane watched Lisbon's lips curl in a smile and knew she was wondering if he was referring to those sawhorses in the attic or his grungy hotel room.

"Yeah, it is." Lisbon snorted at the obvious truth of that statement. "Jane, how did you find me? Nobody's ever told me that."

"Grace did a very thorough job of searching for Volker family holding that weren't general knowledge as I suggested. Bertram and the team thought it was a good idea. Eventually, we compiled a list of eight properties that had fallen into disuse or disrepair and selected the three most promising candidates." Jane told her.

"You selected the three most likely properties." Lisbon corrected him.

"Yes, I did, based on the information your team compiled for me." Jane didn't bother saying he'd done a fair amount of research on his own.

Grace eventually located that deed in great granny's name buried chin deep in dummy corporations and an accompanying scandal that rocked High Society in the 1890's. It seems Volker comes by his madness honestly. Great granny died under questionable circumstance soon after great grandpa found her in bed with another man.

Not surprisingly, it was deemed a suicide though I believe murder more likely.

Considering great granny was a modern girl with money of her own married to a much older man, I hardly think she would take her life over a minor indiscretion prevalent among women of her social class. I think she had a hand from her husband, who by the way, had more than one mistress of his own. Unlike Tommy, great grandpa seems to have gotten away with his crime.

Thanks to you the great grandson isn't. " Jane complimented her.

"Leave it to you to fill in the blanks with a bunch of useless information." Lisbon laughed quietly amused that Jane was trying to take her mind off of her recent ordeal in spite of knowing such a thing wasn't possible.

"Hardly useless, Teresa. Mudding through all of that muck is how we finally found you. Liesle Volker was strung up in the very room Volker imprisoned you in." Jane said quietly. "If we hadn't found that story complete with photographs buried in the archives, we'd never have put the pieces together in time and your fate would be far different than it is.

You see, I recognized the wallpaper in great granny's bedroom and knew that was the room where you were being held. All we had to do was match the property in the photograph with its address and we knew where to find you."

"You recognized the wallpaper in great granny's bedroom?" Lisbon asked in disbelief. "What would have happened if you hadn't found that article?"

"We did so it doesn't matter." Jane rubbed her arms trying to ignore the fact Lisbon was trembling again.

There was time emough to deal with all of that later.


	9. Chapter 8

Pulling into a guest parking space in Lisbon's complex, Jane killed the engine and sat back in his seat gathering his thoughts before removing a familiar key from his pocket. Looking at the sculpted bit of metal on his palm, Jane hesitated a moment before opening his car door. As crazy as it sounded, he'd never used that key once since Lisbon had given it to him a long time ago. She'd qualified her gift with an "in case of emergency" caveat and he'd honored that trust. As they'd never had a situation remotely qualifying as a worthy crisis before now; he'd never used the key.

He'd simply rung the doorbell and waited for admittance like a civilized person.

However, that didn't mean he hadn't been in Lisbon's apartment on the down low once or twice since. He had. He'd just picked her lock as he did at the office and hoped she never found out. Always with just cause, or more truthfully, what passed for just cause in his mind although Lisbon might not see it that way. He doubted the team would either.

Shaking his head, Jane unlocked the door to Lisbon's apartment and carried his garment bag across the threshold. Stopping in the foyer, he surveyed the comfortable living area before heading for the stairs. While he'd more than likely crash on the couch downstairs as he always did, he'd stow his belongings in the guest room out of sight. Hanging his bag in the closet, he decided he'd unpack his belongs later. Besides, he still had another suitcase to bring up. Walking back downstairs, Jane headed for his car.

He had quite a bit to unload and put away before he could settle in for the night. He wasn't too happy about time getting away from him. He'd hoped to have everything finished by now when he'd left Lisbon around nine o'clock this morning soon after learning she'd be released tomorrow. As much as he'd hated leaving her, they'd both known there were necessary things he had to do before her return. Very basic things like grocery shopping and making sure things were in order around her apartment. Not to mention letting Bertram and the team know she was coming home.

Things she wouldn't want him leaving her to do.

Carrying in his second suitcase, Jane acknowledged he'd known swinging by the CBI was a bad idea; but, he'd done it anyway. It had been almost a week since he'd shown his face at work. He hadn't left Lisbon as he'd promised he wouldn't. Whether he was parked in a Waiting Room, the hospital Cafeteria, or in that chair by her bed reading, he'd remained within easy calling distance. And he'd discretely hovered in the corner through every doctor visit. Even the ones Lisbon hated involving that infernal shrink who was clearly doing more harm than good with every visit.

Fortunately, drugged or not, Lisbon was still sleeping most of the time which made it easier on him. Jane suspected her sleep patterns had a lot to do with her body's need to recuperate from her injuries and her mind's desire to escape dealing with atrocities she wasn't yet ready to handle. That made two of them. Jane was grateful for the respite to get his thoughts and feelings in order before Lisbon was discharged into his care which was happening quicker than he'd anticipated.

After leaving Lisbon's room for the three hour drive back to Sacramento, Jane had felt duty bound to swing by the CBI against his better judgement. As it was on the way to Lisbon's apartment, he couldn't really justify pretending work didn't exist. Besides, he needed to check in with Bertram and the team. Update them on Lisbon's status. So, he'd done just that.

A short time later he'd found himself embroiled in a lingering case the team had yet to solve. In a matter of hours he'd gathered the necessary proof to say, "The butler did it!" and mean every word. He'd always wanted to say that. Now he had as the butler _did_ murder his employer before he could get cut out of a sizeable chunk of the will for stealing.

All in all, the case was ridiculous and should have been wrapped up the first day. It hadn't taken him an hour before the pieces started falling into place. His only conclusion at the end of the case was the team had gotten sloppy without Lisbon's determined leadership. Or maybe they'd just been too worried about their Boss to perform up to their usual standards. He didn't really know. What he did know was they'd missed far too many clues leading to the direct evidence they needed to solve the case and that wasn't like them.

After leaving the CBI around four thirty, instead of one thirty as he'd desired; he'd swung by the florist for a welcome home bouquet. He'd have liked to do that last, but beggars couldn't be choosers when the shop closed at five. He'd gotten in an out in the nick of time, carefully wrapped stems in hand.

While homey enough considering Lisbon was a tomboy lady cop, her apartment needed a pick-me-up and a brilliant splash of color amidst all the cooler shades was just the thing. As much as she pretended otherwise, the woman always perked up at the sight of flowers. He'd figured that out over the years. A discreet blossom or two in a bud vase was his best kept secret Get-Out-Of-Jail-Free card next to a small box of those painfully expensive Truffles from the gourmet candy shop down the street.

He'd stopped by there to purchase a larger than usual box on his way to the mall as well. As much as she would protest, Lisbon would love every liquer filled decadent bite. It wasn't like she couldn't stand to gain a pound or two after all she'd been through. Actually, more than a pound or two; but, he wasn't saying anything. She could figure that out on her own.

After hitting a major department store for her favorite perfume and a smelly body shop for a collection of soaps, bath gels, and washes in her favorite fragrances, he'd ended up at the grocery store around six thirty. As he'd shown up at her place with take-out and a movie the Sunday before her disappearance, Jane knew Lisbon's cupboards were pretty bare before she'd told him that night at Trevor's. The case they'd been working was all consuming and she'd been living on take-out and drive-thru for the duration. He'd noticed as well that she was running low on the basic girly necessities like body wash which was why he'd made that otherwise unnecessary trip to the mall.

Walking around the grocery store, he'd bought lots of fresh produce, lean meats, grains, and fruits to tempt Lisbon's appetite as well as the basic staples like detergents, toilet paper, and shampoo. He'd even stopped by the bakery for desserts and pastries and the coffee aisle for her favorite blend. He'd felt strange going through the same motions he'd gone through as a husband and father so many years ago. He and Lisbon weren't intimately involved and, yet, on another level, they were more intimately involved than he'd ever been with another person…even Angela. That thought unsettled him in ways he'd never anticipated.

Shaking his head at the surreal feel to his present reality, Jane grabbed the bouquet and the bags from the mall and carried them inside. After clipping the stems and arranging the flowers in a large blue crystal vase he found in Lisbon's pantry, he returned to the car to haul in the first round of grocery bags. Closing the trunk before making his fourth, and final, trip inside Jane shook off the feeling the next few days were going to shape the rest of his life.

Putting the groceries away, Jane was glad he'd familiarized himself with Lisbon's abode as well as the woman herself over the years. He knew where everything went from the canned goods to the dishwasher detergent and everything in between. He knew she liked sugar and real cream in her coffee and sinfully gooey pastries for breakfast as well which was why he'd purchased all of those things including the bag of whole coffee beans now residing in her freeze waiting to be fresh ground.

Walking up the stairs with two bags in hand, Jane entered Lisbon's bathroom and placed the unopened box of perfume on her lavatory counter. Walking over to slide the shower door open, he cleared away the mostly empty bottles littering the shelves and replaced them with full bottles of body washes and gels as well as the shampoo and conditioner he'd purchased at the grocery store. Making sure her favorite towels and washcloth were draped over the rack, he made his way from the master bath into the master bedroom.

Quickly stripping her bed and remaking it, Jane carried the sheets and pillow cases out into the hall to the landing where he tossed them to the bottom of the stairs. He'd wash her bed clothes tonight and toss them in the dryer in the morning. He'd have them neatly put away before he left for the hospital. Returning to the bedroom, Jane contemplated what needed to be done next.

Taking her garment bag and a small carry on from her closet, Jane grabbed her favorite pair of black leather booties from the bottom of the closet. The pair she often wore to work. Tossing them in the carry on, he added the small zip pouch of travel sized toiletries and cosmetics he'd snatched from her go-bag. Rather than just grabbing the bag she kept stowed in the back of her car for those unexpected over-nighters, he'd opted for taking the more personalized approach choosing things he thought she'd be comfortable wearing now. Digging out her favorite pair of jeans from her chest of drawers and her favorite dark lilac blouse and belt from her closet, Jane tossed them on the bed before adding her favorite casual black blazer. The one making her look like an off-duty cop trying to masquerade as one of the masses and failing miserably. Jane smiled at the thought no matter how many times he shared that truth, Lisbon refused to believe him.

After carefully tucking the outfit in her garment bag, Jane walked over to her dresser to pull out a drawer somewhat surprised Lisbon appeared to have rearranged everything since the last time he'd perused her belongings. This drawer used to be filled with her serviceable, everyday under garments. Now it was filled with the racier bits like the one she'd never intended him knowing she wore. Closing the drawer, Jane opened the one next to him pleased to find it filled with socks. Grabbing a pair of black boot socks and tossing them over his shoulder to land on the bed, he opened the next drawer uttering a quiet "Bingo!" as he found what he was looking for. Grabbing a selection of undergarments as he wasn't sure what Lisbon would be able to wear including a soft lilac set that matched her shirt, Jane carried them over to smaller suitcase.

While he wasn't sure what she could wear due to her injuries, he was sure she wouldn't be wearing any of those lovely bits of silk and lace any time soon. Jane wondered briefly if he'd be better off moving all of those things to the guest room dresser for now and decided against it. He didn't want to mess with Lisbon's home too much. He was overstepping the bounds in going through her closet and drawers as it was.

Leaving the luggage on her bed, Jane took one last look around Lisbon's bedroom and bath satisfied everything was ready for her return. Walking down the stairs, he ambled into the kitchen to make a sandwich and have a cup of tea.

Removing the ham, mayo, lettuce, tomato, and cheese from the refrigerator, Jane took a couple of slices of bread from the bag and made his sandwich while the kettle heated for his tea. Opening a bag of chips, he added a few to his plate before steeping his tea. Once his meal was assembled, Jane carried it over to table and stared at it. He really wasn't hungry, but he needed to eat as lunch had been a long time ago. Taking a bite of his sandwich, Jane decided as soon as he finished his dinner and had a shower he'd call it a day. It was pushing ten and he needed to be up by six and at the CBI twenty minutes later to meet the team.

On the surface, Lisbon was getting an unofficial welcoming committee saluting her first steps into freedom after three long weeks. Under the surface, they weren't letting Lisbon escape to her apartment without seeing for themselves that she was doing okay. None of them had any idea they'd get another opportunity to see Lisbon before she was ready so they weren't taking any chances. While she might kick all of their asses for their impertinence, they were going to see their Boss no matter the cost. Jane agreed with the team's decision and Lisbon knew they were coming. She knew them far too well to expect anything differently.

Carrying his empty plate and cup to the sink to wash them, Jane suspected Lisbon would be walking out of that hospital around ten as her doctor had promised if not before.

Knowing a certain feisty brunette, she'd make sure of it.

###

Leaving the guys in the Waiting Room, Jane made his way down the hall luggage in hand. Just as he'd expected, Risby, Van Pelt, and Cho had been waiting in the hospital parking lot when he'd pulled up. They wouldn't be Lisbon's team had they acted any differently. Smiling at the thought, Jane stopped in front of the familiar door.

"Lisbon?" He cracked the door to her hospital room not that surprised to find Lisbon standing in front of the window covered in the oversized sleep shirt Van Pelt had bought and dropped by for her a few days ago.

She'd known how much her Boss hated that stupid hospital gown.

Studying Lisbon's intense expression, Jane decided someone should have interrupted her a long time ago. From the look on her face, it seemed the progress they'd made the last few days had been wiped away in the face of venturing into the world beyond those hospital doors. It seemed Lisbon still had reservations.

"I brought your suit and the rest of your things." He closed the door behind him.

"Thank you." Lisbon turned red suddenly uncomfortable with the thought of Jane going through her drawers even knowing there was no one else who could do it.

She couldn't halt the thought that while they were close; they weren't _that _close.

"You're welcome." Jane laid her garment bag over the bed and set her small suitcase on the floor ignoring her embarrassment. "It was my pleasure."

"Shush, Jane." Lisbon said automatically knowing he hadn't meant it the way it sounded.

"You shush." Jane shot back pleased to see shades of the old Lisbon reappearing in spite of everything. "It isn't like I don't have a key to your place or I've never seen your underwear drawer."

"Shush, Jane." Lisbon said again not really minding either his admission he'd prowled through her most intimate belongings over the years or his borderline risqué banter.

Both were comfortably Jane.

"Lisbon, what were you thinking when I came in?" She'd been much too deeply in her own private world for her thoughts to be anything good.

"How close I came to the nightmare never ending." Lisbon answered honestly. "How close I came to losing myself and being destroyed…How close I came to losing you."

She could admit the truth to Jane. He'd never betray her secrets and he'd always understand. She was sure of that after the past few days. Maybe she always had been. He _had_ claimed long ago he'd always save her.

"That was never going to happen, My Dear." Jane said quietly taking her in his arms and rubbing his hand over her back in soothing circles. "Especially not that last one so get it out of your head."

He didn't have to say he'd always save her again. He'd said that years ago and he'd meant it. She'd accepted his words at face value whether she'd truly believed them or not at the time.

"You know his final intent?" Lisbon felt Jane's arms tighten at her words. "He wasn't going to kill me. Death would be too kind after what I'd done to him."

Volker had shared his every intention in agonizingly explicit detail. He'd even shown her his torture chamber and he'd told her how he'd used it in the past. And how he intended using it on her. One day soon she'd know the exact body count they'd exhumed from the back garden and it wouldn't be pretty. She had a feeling Red John had nothing on their pretty boy. He'd also made it abundantly clear she deserved everything she was suffering and all the suffering yet to come.

She'd dared to interfere with his plans and that just wasn't done.

"Yes, I know his final intent and the man is a raving lunatic." Jane spat wishing he could squash Volker like the roach he was. Cho hadn't roughed him up nearly enough and his Big House friends had yet to act. With any luck, Volker was being toyed with much as he'd toyed with Lisbon in preparation for the big event. Or maybe he was still in solitary. Jane hadn't bothered to check. He had no doubts Volker would get initiated when the welcoming committee was ready to spring it on him. "That wasn't going to happen. I wouldn't let it."

As much as he wished otherwise, Lisbon wouldn't have appreciated him killing yet another man to keep her safe. Then again, in this instance, she might feel differently. Maybe he should have taken the chance. She would have forgiven him eventually. She always did.

"Not if you could stop it." Lisbon agreed.

"Did you ever doubt I would?" Jane said with more confidence than he'd felt going through their ordeal.

"I don't think I ever did." She hadn't allowed herself to.

"Good." There wasn't much left to say.

"I never wanted you to know." Lisbon whispered against his jacket for the hundredth time. "None of it."

"There wasn't much either of us could do about that as I had a front row seat." Jane said as he kissed her hair. "Volker figured out early on that you're my weakness and I'm yours."

"I suppose he did." Lisbon agreed.

"If he needed to be told, I believe Brenda cued him in on the rumors." Jane added that to the list of Shettrick's sins she'd pay dearly for before he was done.

As for the other, it was one of the hazards of caring for anyone in their line of work...In law enforcement...If the bad guys were smart, they knew precisely where to go for the kill. Especially when two members worked together…Their greatest vulnerability was always front and center…as his had been for years.

And Lisbon's as well.

"I guess we couldn't." Lisbon rested her hand over his heart taking comfort in the steady beat beneath her palm. "What about my team?"

"They never saw anything to embarrass or humiliate you." Jane reassured her. "I've already told you that."

And they hadn't either if he didn't count that one time with Cho.

He couldn't allow Lisbon to be brought that low.

"I know you only did what you had to do." Lisbon agreed refusing to look at him.

She couldn't get her mind around the things Jane had seen and she wondered briefly if he'd seen the parts she'd wanted him to see. The parts where she'd let him know about her concern for him. That thoughts of him was all that was keeping her grounded. That she still wanted to have that talk one day. That talk and a whole lot more.

Somehow, she thought he had.

He'd seen it as Volker had.

"Teresa, look at me." Jane commanded softly not willing to let her retreat inside herself knowing he'd seen her frailties. The fact they kept coming back to this same conversation, back to what he'd seen, over and over again, proved nothing so much as he truly wasn't getting through to her. "There are things you need to know."

"Jane, please." Lisbon closed her eyes at the thought of the indignities he'd witnessed.

"Teresa, look at me." Jane repeated as he gently forced her to look at him carefully avoiding the bruises littering her face. "None of that matters. I certainly don't think any less of you for surviving weeks in the hands of that madman when no one else has. If anything, I admire you more than ever and considering I've never admired anyone more than you to begin with that's saying a lot."

There were emotions other than admiration swirled into how he felt about the woman in his arms; but, now wasn't the time for discussing that. Lisbon wasn't ready to hear his feelings. And he wasn't ready to tell her. It would be a while…For both of them.

"Yeah?" Lisbon didn't sound entirely convinced.

"Yeah." Jane repeated her word back at her. "You're Lisbon."

"Shush, Jane." Lisbon responded as he dropped a comforting kiss on her hair.

"What do you say to me carrying those in there and you getting dressed?" Jane nodded back towards the bags on her bed. "The sooner you do that, the sooner we can get out of here and head for home."

"That sounds like a plan." Lisbon agreed as she disentangled from his arms and watched Jane carry her bags into the small bathroom.

She'd already taken a shower last night so all she had to do was dab on a touch of makeup and slip into her clothes before they could leave. She'd even signed the necessary releases a while ago although she couldn't leave until the nurse came in to give her the last of her prescriptions, bandages, and instructions.

"I'll be out here if you need me." Jane said quietly as he watched her enter the bathroom and close the door behind her before walking across the room to settle in his comfortable chair.

Pulling out his cell, he scrolled through his messages smiling at Van Pelt's eager text wondering when they'd finally be out. Typing a few quick words, Jane hit the send button, put his phone back in his pocket, leaned back in his chair and closed his eyes. With any luck he'd get a few winks in before Lisbon was ready to go.

"Jane." He hadn't expected to hear Lisbon call so soon and he didn't like the odd note in her voice.

Walking across the room, he rested his hand on the handle of the bathroom door.

"I'm here, Lisbon." He wasn't opening that door without her express permission.

"I need help." That note was still there.

"Open the door." Jane waited patiently to hear the necessary words.

"It isn't locked." Lisbon hadn't even thought about locking the door against Jane.

"Ah, Lisbon?" There was a certain degree of surprise in his tone.

Whatever he'd been expecting when he opened that door, Jane hadn't expected this. Lisbon was standing in nothing but her bra and panties with her shirt hanging open.

"I don't know what's happening; but, I can't get the buttons done." Lisbon held out her trembling hands.

"It's your first real day going out there." Jane gestured in the direction of where the parking lot would be as he took her hands and lifted them. Brushing his lips against her knuckles, he gently returned her hands to her sides ignoring the tremoring he knew was embarrassing her more than her bare flesh at this point. "Some kind of reaction was bound to set in."

Fastening the buttons on the lilac top he'd chosen, Jane deliberately focused on Lisbon's eyes ignoring the wide expanse of pale skin the lilac bra exposed to his view. Given the choices he'd packed, he was somewhat surprised she'd chosen the pretty matching set. He'd expected something suitably neutral and serviceable instead. Banishing that thought from his head, Jane found comfort in the degree of trust Lisbon was exhibiting in him that he was standing here in the first place. He wouldn't betray that confidence by reacting like a man.

He refused to ogle her tempting flesh if it killed him and it might before he was done. His Lisbon was an incredibly beautiful woman from the inside out.

Looking over her shoulder, Jane took her jeans from the counter and held them down for Lisbon to step into. Watching her slide first one foot and then the other into the legs of her jeans he gently pulled the pants up over her hips before neatly tucking the tail of her silk blouse into the waist. Catching a hint of lilac lace as he redid her button and zipper, Jane forced a detachment indicating helping his woman dress for the day was nothing out of the ordinary. Or that he'd dare call her "his woman" even in the recesses of his mind wasn't something that would get him killed on a good day.

"Hold me, Jane." Stepping closer, Lisbon didn't have to make his arms encircle her waist as she made her request.

"Always." She felt soft lips against her hair.

"I had a good time at _Trevor's_...None of this changes that." Lisbon said softly.

It was her memories of the promising moments between them hinting at so much more that had pulled her through her darkest hours.

And her belief that none of what was happening to her would change what she felt blossoming between them.

"I did, too, and we'll do it again soon." Jane promised. "The first Thursday you're ready to go."

"I'd like that." Steadying herself with her hands on his shoulders, Lisbon leaned in to lightly brush her lips against his in a manner speaking of comfort and trust and little more.

Certainly nothing remotely sexual in nature.

"And we'll revisit this later when you've had time to deal with everything you've been through." Jane responded with an answering whisper light touch of his lips against hers. "We've waited a decade. We can wait a little longer for what is to come."

"Yes, we can." Lisbon agreed.

"I'm not going anywhere, Teresa. As soon as you're ready…" Jane didn't feel the need to say anything more.

"I'd like that and I'm going to hold you to it." Lisbon had a feeling she wouldn't have to hold Jane to anything.

She was sure he'd be waiting as soon as she was ready to cross that line again. He was giving her every indication he would. She'd take him at his word.

"Then you can count on it." Jane squeezed her a little tighter. "We need to get out there as I'm sure the team will be walking through the door at any moment to see you home and we wouldn't want them to catch us in a compromising position."

"Shush, Jane, we both know they won't come in here without knocking." Lisbon said against his chest. "You really want to make sure I can handle seeing Rigsby and Cho."

"Yeah, Lisbon, I do." Jane agreed with her. "You've been through a lot. You're still going through a lot. You'll be going through a lot for a while to come. I don't want you doing anything that'll set you back from the start."

"I'm okay." Lisbon reassured him. "I've known my guys for a long time and I'm not afraid of them…Embarrassed; but, not afraid. The rest of my co-workers at the CBI may be a different story." Lisbon answered honestly knowing how her heart still palpitated at the thought of returning to work.

Not to the job itself; but, to the environment crawling with people she no longer trusted to keep her safe.

It was going to be rough however long; but, she'd get through it. She had to. Her work was everything.

"None of that matters right now." Jane reminded her. "It'll be a while before you're cleared for work and I'm not leaving you alone before you're ready."

"I know you won't." Lisbon said quietly as she disentangled herself from his grip and stepped away. "Let me pack my bags. I'm sure we can go if you'll let the nurse know I'm ready. She has a few prescriptions for me that I don't really want."

"But you'll take and we're getting filled." Jane said firmly. "As much as I know you don't like pills and I'm not going to force you to take them, there's no reason not to have your pain pills on hand if you need them."

"It isn't the pain pills you're talking about and we both know it." Lisbon corrected him. Jane knew she wasn't averse to taking the edge off the pain of her cracked ribs. It was the other drugs she had a problem with…especially since her encounter with her favorite shrink Dr. Carmen so long ago. "You want to have the sedatives and sleeping pills on hand if I need them."

"Having them in the house doesn't mean you have to take them." Jane reminded her. "Oh, and I should probably tell you, in case you're thinking of doing a little self medicating with Bosco's favorite Tequila or that god awful blend you think passes for Whiskey, I cleaned the liquor cabinets out. If you want a glass of wine with dinner, we'll talk about it. That other stuff is off limits."

"You don't have that right, Jane." Lisbon said quietly knowing she'd already contemplated the pleasant burn accompanying a healthy shot of good Tequila. "I'm a grown woman. I can make my own decisions."

"I have every right, Lisbon." Jane corrected her. "You gave me that right when you asked me to help you through this."

"I guess I did." Lisbon relented thinking perhaps he was right.

"You did." Jane agreed. "Trust me when I say about the time your mind starts replaying video you'd rather forget and it finally sinks in that Thomas Volker knows your far more intimately in certain ways than any man who's actually shared your bed, crawling into that liquor bottle's going to start looking pretty good. I'm not going to let that happen. You can either talk to me or take one of your trusty pills. Whichever you choose though I think the talking will be better."

"It sounds like you've got this all planned out." Lisbon said quietly as she began placing her cosmetics back in the bag.

"I do." Jane confirmed. "We'll hang out at your place and talk for a while. Get you ready to snow the old CBI shrink. Figure out the best way to fluff over the details while still making you look like you've made great strides towards getting well. By the time we're done, we'll have you signed off on before they know what hit them.

Don't get me wrong, you're going to have to talk about the ugly stuff; but, you're going to do that with me. Between the two of us, we'll make sure you don't have to tell the CBI any more than you want them to know. Than you want shared with Bertram and the higher ups.

And when you're ready, we'll start going places like the park and the CBI gym late at night when it's mostly deserted. I know you want to get back into your workouts as soon as you can. Maybe we'll go to the Firing Range. I know you'd like that. I wouldn't mind a little target practice myself."

"You make it sound easy." Lisbon zipped her garment bag.

"Not easy, Teresa, doable." Jane corrected her. "There's going to be a lot of cussing, screaming, and tears before we're done. I don't want you thinking otherwise."

Deciding no verbal response was necessary, Lisbon nodded her head as she watched Jane lift her black blazer and hold it up. Sliding her arms through the sleeves, she checked her appearance in the mirror one last time. In spite of the poorly concealed bruises on her face and the glaring burn on her neck, she looked as close to herself as she was going to get. And, considering what she'd been through, not nearly as bad as she'd expected.

Lisbon suspected that had something to do with Jane.

"The team's waiting." Jane said as he held the bathroom door open. "We can stop by the Nurse's Station on the way out."

"Sounds like a plan." Lisbon agreed as she walked through the door knowing Jane was following her with her luggage in tow.

"Lisbon?" Jane stopped her with a hand on her arm.

"Yeah?" Lisbon already knew what he was going to ask.

"Are you ready for this?" Shifting the garment back to his left shoulder and the suitcase to his left hand, Jane reached out to drape his right arm around Lisbon's shoulders.

"I think I am now." Lisbon said as she wrapped her arm around his waist and leaned into Jane taking comfort in his hard presence.

"Then let's go." Jane led her down the hall carefully gauging Lisbon's reaction to the sudden freedom.

"Where are the guys?" Lisbon asked.

"They're down the hall in that Waiting Room on the right." Jane said. "We'll stop by the Nurse's Station first then walk out to the car with Van Pelt and the guys."

"That works for me." Lisbon agreed.

A few minutes later, she found herself standing awkwardly in front of her team with her prescriptions in hand. Smiling at the rapid fire greetings, Lisbon did her best not to convey she'd rather be anywhere but where she was at this moment in time. While she loved her team, she wasn't comfortable with them seeing her like this. Bruised and battered and more out of control than she'd ever felt in her life. Jane seeing her was hard enough. Her team was even worse.

"Okay guys, you've seen your Boss and she's doing fine." Jane said before the silence could grow any more strained. "What do you say we move this party to the parking lot? You all have work to do here and we have to get back to Lisbon's place."

As he'd expected, Lisbon's team followed his order leading the way to the familiar car parked on the front row of the parking lot.

"You drove my car up here without asking me?" Lisbon stared at Jane in disbelief.

"I thought you'd enjoy the ride back." Jane responded as he opened the passenger side door knowing Lisbon saw right through him.

He'd thought her outrage would dissipate any lingering awkwardness with her team exactly as it was doing.

"Thank you for seeing me off." Lisbon spoke sincerely to her team ignoring Jane for the moment.

She'd rip him a new one soon enough.

"Hey, Boss?" Cho took a step forward.

"Yeah, Cho?" Lisbon asked.

"He's going to get the death penalty." He said with confidence.

"I know." Lisbon agreed. "We can prove multiple cases of first-degree murder with special circumstances. You did good work. I'm proud of you."

Accepting Cho's answering nod for the team, Lisbon allowed Jane to settle in her seat before closing the door. Walking around the car to the driver's side, he caught Cho's eye.

"I'll keep you updated and I'll see you at the office in a few days." Opening the driver's side door, Jane slid in beside Lisbon without waiting for a response.

Watching the team turn to amble back towards their SUV, Jane turned to adjust Lisbon's seat belt.

"That was awkward." She commented unnecessarily.

"I suppose it was." Jane agreed. "It'll get better with a little time and distance. We've all been through a lot. It's going to take those three a while to get over almost losing you. They were almost as upset as I was when we figured out what Volker had done."

"I guess they were." Lisbon agreed.

"No, Teresa, there's no guessing to it." Jane said as he backed out of the parking lot. "They were. Don't ever doubt what you mean to your team any more than they should doubt what they mean to you."

"I'm sorry for putting all of you through that." Lisbon said wearily as she closed her eyes deciding that pain pill her nurse had insisted she take right before Jane had appeared was finally kicking in. "I never should have gone to the grocery store that late. I knew it wasn't safe."

"You've done that a hundred times before so going to the grocery store at that hour had nothing to do with what happened." Jane corrected her. "The fact Volker was having you followed did. If he hadn't gotten you then, he'd have gotten you some other time somewhere else so you have nothing to apologize for. It's all on Tommy's head."

Hearing her dismissive snuffle in response, Jane glanced over satisfied Lisbon was falling asleep which was probably the best thing for her. She wouldn't be feeling any pain and she wouldn't be worried about any calamities befalling her precious sports car at his hands. Yep, definitely a win-win situation for everyone involved as he could enjoy flooring this baby without being reprimanded.

Well, maybe not flooring it; but, still going a good sight faster than Lisbon would approve of him going.

###

"We're home." Jane opened the door to Lisbon's apartment and motioned her inside.

"Where are your things?" Her place looked exactly like it had when she left for work the morning her life changed forever.

Nothing was out of place and there wasn't a piece of Jane in sight.

Except for the pretty bouquet arranged in the middle of her dining room table.

She wondered briefly what was up with Jane and flowers before deciding what the hell. She'd always liked getting flowers. If it made Jane feel better to give her some, she'd gladly let him. She'd been sorry to leave that monster bouquet behind at the Nurse's Station; but, trying to get it home undamaged wasn't practical. There was a big difference between a ten minute ride across town and a three hour drive down the Interstate.

"Upstairs in the guest room." Dropping her suitcases in the foyer, Jane walked into the kitchen to move the kettle over a burner.

"That makes sense." Lisbon watched him remove a cup and saucer from a cabinet shelf before removing a glass from another.

Jane was clearly making a cup of tea; but, he was also pouring her a glass of Cola. Lisbon decided she could get used to treatment like this. Walking over to take the glass from his hand, she stared at the cherry flavored Cola trying to remember how long it had been since she'd last had the treat.

"Why don't you go to your room and freshen up? I'll take you bags up later when you're done." Jane said as he poured water over the tea ball in his cup. "I'll also fix us some lunch while you're gone."

"I can do that." Taking a sip from her glass, Lisbon cast a faintly apprehensive glance in the direction of the stairs.

"Do you need me to go with you?" Jane set the tea ball aside after discarding the loose leaves in the trash can beneath the sink.

"This is my apartment." Lisbon said fiercely. "I'm not going to let Volker make me afraid in my own home."

"Good girl." Jane said as he walked over to remove a package of ground beef from the refrigerator and a bag of chipotle sweet potato fries from the freezer. "Take your time. All of this is going to take a while to cook."

Lisbon deserved more than the cold sandwich and chips he'd had last night. Homemade hamburgers with her condiments of choice, caramelized onions, lettuce, and tomato accompanied by hot sweet potato fries and dill pickle spears would work just fine. Especially when they ended it all with fresh baked peanut butter chocolate kiss cookies. Granted the cookies weren't made from scratch. They were those nifty little break apart squares he'd bought from the refrigerator aisle; but, who really cared? They'd still be delicious warm from the oven.

"I'll do that." Lisbon discarded her half full glass on the counter.

"Take a long, hot shower." Jane suggested as he turned on the oven to preheat. "It'll help you relax."

"I'll do that." Staring at the stairs, Lisbon hesitated.

It was one thing to walk around her hospital room knowing she was in clear sight of the Nurse's Station and that Jane was only a shout away. It was another to walk up those stairs, down that deserted hall, and into a bedroom she hadn't seen since the night she was snatched all alone. The thought made her slightly nauseous. Forcing one foot in front of the other, Lisbon climbed the stairs and turned the light on at the top of the landing. If she went left, she'd find herself in the guest room Jane was using. Turning right, she headed for her room instead.

Flipping the switch in her bedroom, she glanced briefly at her neatly made up bed and shivered.

It was on a bed similar to hers that Volker had undressed her and whisked her clothes away. That he'd taped and live streamed the revolting things he'd done to her to the one person she'd never wanted to see them. That he'd touched her in ways she hadn't liked and licked her skin perversely promising unknown torments to come. That he'd run his fingers over her and in her in abhorrent ways making her skin crawl and her body jerk away in horror.

Fighting to control her breathing, Lisbon closed her eyes powerless to stop the visions playing across her mind. The ones Jane knew nothing about as Volker hadn't taped those encounters. The ones where he'd shoved the before and after photographs of his victims in her face gloating over his finesse in delivering the punishments they'd so justly deserved. If she'd had any remaining doubts he was a soulless monster, they'd quickly disappeared in the face of what she'd seen. Beautiful women reduced to mangled corpses barely recognizable as human before they'd ever been buried in the cold, dark ground.

He'd meant to do something similar to her stopping short of actually taking her life.

No, he'd have taken her life.

He just wouldn't have killed her.

He'd have left her a walking corpse more pathetic than Kristina Frye.

Overcome by the imagery short circuiting her brain, Lisbon ran to the toilet to vomit yet again. She'd been doing that entirely too much lately since they'd taken her off the heavy drugs and the flashbacks had started.

Calming her runaway emotions, Lisbon amended her earlier thought. She was wrong in trying to convince herself Volker hadn't taped those encounters. She'd be far better off accepting the truth. He was too much of a narcissist not to have taped one of his crowning moments as she'd shattered so beautifully in her fear and agony. Her performance had been too over-the-top not have taped. She knew that.

Volker just hadn't streamed his recording to her Mentalist preferring to keep those lovely videos as Jane's coupe de grace after the worse was done.

Flushing the toilet and brushing her teeth, Lisbon decided to prepare for the worst as there was no way those videos weren't going to surface before the case was done. The best case scenario was they'd be sealed from the general public during Court as she was a Law Enforcement Officer. The worse, they'd play out in the public eye and everyone would see her reaction to the video he'd shown her.

The one where his last victim had pleaded so raggedly for her death as Volker raped and tortured her in unmentionable ways over and over again.

It was the video that had finally broken her in too many ways.

He'd taken the fight right out of her for a while as she'd temporarily retreated somewhere deep inside unable to process the horrors she'd seen. And while Lisbon knew that woman, girl really, was long dead by the date stamp…she hadn't seen her put out of her misery so she was clueless how much longer she'd suffered. Surely not that long as she'd clearly been at the end of her physical and mental endurance.

But, the human spirit was a remarkable thing and the will to live strong.

She could attest to that as she'd been willing to do anything it took to get back to Jane.

Not to survive…to get back to Jane.

Lisbon was under no illusions concerning the truth of that. She'd refused to die, or be destroyed, before she had a chance to walk through that door so slowly opening between them. The one exposing feelings better left unsaid; but, feelings all the more tempting because of that. If she didn't miss her guess, and she knew didn't, she and Jane were on the same page.

If that meant viewing the sexual abuses wrought on her body as happening to someone else, she could do that. If that meant imagining it was Jane touching her, drawing responses from her that would otherwise be unwanted, she could do that. If that meant sullying what would one day be beautiful between them, she could do that. And she had.

She'd done all of that and more in the name of survival.

And she refused to feel guilty or ashamed.

Swiping the tears from her face, Lisbon confronted her reflection. Who the hell was she trying to fool? She was beyond guilty and her shame was a palpable thing. But, she'd deal with all of that later.

Right now, she was going to walk over to the shower and turn the water on as hot as it would go just as she was now doing. Not that she really needed another shower or the pain it would cost her; but, she did need to go through the motions of normalcy in her home. Nothing was more normal than her morning shower. Jane knew that which was why he'd suggested another shower in the first place. That and knowing she'd find great comfort in smelling like she always smelled instead of like a hospital. Speaking of Jane, now that he could hear the water running and knew she was doing what she'd come up her to do in the first place, he would start cooking. She had about a half hour to get her butt in gear before lunch would be on the table.

Walking into her bedroom, Lisbon quickly undressed hanging her blazer and blouse in the closet before tucking her jeans away in a drawer. Walking back into the bathroom, she carefully removed her bra and panties wincing at the bruises and cuts covering her body before dropping the undergarments in the waiting hamper and closing the lid. Stepping into her shower, she smiled at the fresh bottles littering the shelves.

Someone had been a very busy boy and, while she appreciated his effort, it was going to be a long time before she was taking any bubble baths. Quickly sponging off with her spicy body wash, Lisbon rinsed under the spray before stepping out of the shower and toweling dry.

Slipping into the tank and pajama bottoms Jane had left neatly folded on the counter top, Lisbon surveyed her appearance. She looked like hell and that wouldn't do. As much as she hated the idea of doing anything more than applying a roll of deodorant and dragging a comb through her damp hair, she couldn't go downstairs looking like this.

Opening a drawer and reaching for a bottle of foundation, Lisbon made short work of rubbing the tinted liquid over her face. In a matter of minutes, she'd applied eye shadow, liner, mascara, blush and hint of gloss to her lips. As ridiculous as it seemed to go to that much effort considering she wasn't leaving the house any time soon, Lisbon admitted she looked much better. Putting her cosmetic brushes away in the pouch, her eye was caught by the cellophane wrapped box in the corner by the sink. Unwrapping the parcel, she pulled the atomizer from the protective cardboard liner. Jane had replaced her almost empty bottle of perfume which he shouldn't have done. A package or two of inexpensive bath gel and body wash was one thing; but, this was too much.

Sniffing, but refusing to cry, Lisbon popped the lid and sprayed a light mist on her pulse points before returning the small bottle back to its box.

As much as she wanted nothing more than to bury her head under the covers and never come out, she wasn't doing that. For one thing, it wasn't practical. For another, her family and her team wouldn't let her. If that wasn't enough, there was a remarkable man downstairs fixing her lunch who wouldn't appreciate being abandoned. Staring at her reflection as she gathered her emotions under tight rein, Lisbon made herself a promise.

Today she'd hold it together for Jane.

He deserved that much after weeks of holding it together for her.

She could give him that much.

The briefest respite of gentle peace before the storm.


	10. Chapter 9

A/N: To my guests, thank you for the reviews.

Sorry for the delay in updating. RL has been a bear when it comes to writing.~Calla

#####

Standing at the top of the stairs, Lisbon decided something smelled good. Really good and she was hungry no matter what she'd originally thought. In fact, her stomach was growling. It seemed unpleasant memories hadn't dampened her appetite. Not where food was concerned and not today anyways. Besides, hospital food left much to be desired when compared to how whatever Jane was cooking smelled.

There was something about caramelizing onions making her mouth water.

Taking a deep breath and putting on her best "I'm Okay" face, Lisbon mentally steeled herself to deal with the coming day. Leaving that nice, safe hospital room hadn't been as easy as she'd thought. In fact, she'd spent most of the long ride back with a churning stomach and clammy skin. There was something about parking lots and cars she wasn't handling well.

Maybe the fact her last lucid memory of both was of being grabbed from a well lit parking lot and forced into a strange car.

The ride to the hospital after the rescue didn't count as she didn't remember much about that.

Stopping halfway down the stairs, Lisbon admitted for a woman who didn't fear very much she'd been nothing but afraid these last few weeks with good reason. First there was Volker. Later, there was the very real fear one of Volker's men could get to her in her hospital room. She'd already experience the reach of Volker's evil tentacles first hand. She wasn't foolish enough to blindly believe just because the man was in jail his threats were neutralized. Fortunately, Jane had suddenly appeared letting her know she was safe and no one would hurt her again. He'd make sure of that.

She'd chosen to believe him.

Eventually, she'd lost herself in the comfortable reality she'd created in her mind. The one where Real Life and all that entailed wasn't waiting outside just outside the door. The fantasy had worked for a while.

Until the day her doctors decided to release her.

Leaving her hospital room was far more difficult than she'd thought. She'd lost it trying to dress herself. As usual, Jane had been there to take over and she'd gladly let him. The fear nearly bringing her to her knees walking through those halls with Jane's arm wrapped tightly around her waist had surprised her. She shouldn't have felt that way; but, she did. Then she'd had to deal with the long ride home and how she'd felt entering her home.

How she still felt if she were honest.

Her past fears were justified. The fear she felt now, not so much.

Lisbon wiped her face with her hand and chided herself for her foolishness. She was standing in the middle of the familiar apartment she'd lived in for longer than she'd known Jane. The one place she'd _always_ felt safe and her favorite refuge from the storms.

Added to that, the Bogeyman was locked away in his box. He couldn't hurt her anymore and she knew that. Volker wasn't getting out this time. The evidence against him was just too good.

That being said, her knees shouldn't be trembling at the thought of walking downstairs. But they were.

Even knowing Jane was waiting for her.

Resting against the wall, Lisbon admitted she was still afraid and she didn't like it.

It wasn't natural and it wasn't her.

Shoving her unsettling thoughts to the back of her mind, Lisbon walked down the stairs catching sight of her bare toenails. The last time she'd polished her nails was the night before she'd met Jane at _Trevor's_. It hadn't mattered he'd never see her brightly polished nails. Only that giving herself the mini-pedicure made her feel prettier and more feminine. More like someone Jane would be attracted to.

She'd been right.

Jane _had_ liked what he saw as appreciation shone clearly in his eyes.

Shaking her head over her ridiculous thoughts, Lisbon wondered briefly if she could get Jane to paint her toe nails her favorite shade of Vixen Red. She bet she could. Armed with that thought, and the small bottle in her pajama bottom pocket, she decided she might put the theory to the test after they finished their late lunch.

They'd need something to do other than sitting around staring at each other hour on end as she doubted Jane would be letting her out of his sight any time soon.

Not that she wanted to be.

Hanging out in her bedroom alone hadn't been all that much fun with all the memories floating around in her head. She had every idea it would be a while before she wasn't seeing another bed in another room and reliving all the unpleasantness happening there. A while before she was truly comfortable in her own skin again much less anywhere else. As for any real talking, she wasn't ready for that even if Jane tried to force the issue.

Maybe he'd take the hint if she put on her best happy face.

It was worth a try.

"Something smells good." Walking into the kitchen, Lisbon stared longingly at the thick, juicy hamburger Jane was assembling on artisan Ciabatta bread.

"You." Jane turned his head to drop a kiss on her forehead as he squirted brown mustard over the bun in his hand. "Look good, too."

She did look better than she'd looked in days.

"Not that I don't appreciate it; but, you shouldn't have done the whole perfume thing." Lisbon watched him place the squared slab of bread over the thick patty gently pressing it into place and thought he looked kind of cute in an apron.

Actually, Jane shouldn't have done any of it from the flowers to the bath products to her filled refrigerator and pantry. But, he really shouldn't have sprung for his final gift. She didn't need that bottle of ridiculously expensive perfume replete with the sumptuous notes of cinnamon and sandalwood. And while the fragrance was her all time favorite, she rarely wore the real deal saving that indulgence for special occasions like dinner at _Trevor's_. Besides, her idea of the real deal was that nearly empty bottle of Eau de Parfum costing a third of Jane's offering.

"I can certainly afford a bottle of perfume for my best girl and I wanted you to have it." Jane scooped a handful of sweet potato fries onto her plate taking in the soft smile lighting her face at his words. A three hundred dollar bottle of perfume was nothing in the big scheme of things. Satisfied Lisbon was getting his point, Jane quirked a questioning brow at her. "I suppose you're going to slaughter my creation by drowning it in tomatoey goodness?"

"It's not a burger without ketchup." Jane rolled his eyes as she hauled the familiar bottle from the depths of the refrigerator. "You know that."

He should have hidden the ketchup as well as the booze.

Her burger didn't need anything more than the spicy brown mustard and homemade chipotle sauce he'd already slathered it with. He was sure of it. Besides, the chipotle sauce had plenty of ketchup in it anyway though he'd never admit such a thing to Lisbon. She'd never let him live it down. What could he say? The red stuff was easy to use and a good base on which to build deeper, richer flavors by adding the right ingredients.

"No, I don't; but, you won't have it any other way." Jane said in a disgusted tone.

"Shush." Lisbon smirked at his expression as she added a few generous squirts of ketchup to the bottom of her bun and over her fries.

Jane had already done an excellent job of coating the top bun with other sauces.

"For the record, that is totally gross." Jane said as he carried both of their plates over to Lisbon's dining table.

"Is not." Lisbon said as she sat in the chair he pulled out for her.

"Is to." Jane took his chair beside her.

"Are we going to bicker like a couple of ten year olds or are we going to eat?" Lisbon asked as she took the first heavenly bite.

"I suspect a little of both." Jane said as he dunked one of his fries in Lisbon's ketchup before taking a delicate nibble.

"You eat like a girl." Lisbon observed with a smile.

"Yeah, well, you eat like a trucker what of it?" Jane teased knowing his words were mostly true.

For a small woman, she could tuck in some serious food when the mood struck. Not that he minded. He'd always liked a woman with a healthy appetite. Besides, Lisbon was a little on the thin side for his tastes on a good day. Not that he didn't find her perfect, he did. But, he wouldn't complain if she gained a pound or two or ten…especially now. She could definitely use some serious filling out after her ordeal.

"This is delicious." Lisbon gave him a cheeky grin saying she wasn't changing her eating habits any time soon. "Thank you."

"You're welcome." He enjoyed cooking for Lisbon and she knew it.

He usually cooked on those rare occasions he'd crashed on her couch over the years and she'd always appreciated it. Nothing particularly fancy just basic comfort foods. Things like pasta or the cookies he'd recently put in the oven. The ones she hadn't smelled yet or she'd already be bugging him to know when they'd be done.

"Thank you, Jane." Lisbon deliberately stared at her plate instead of looking at Jane.

They both knew she was thanking him for more than dinner.

"No thanks necessary." Jane said honestly as he covered her hand with his. "There's no where I'd rather be."

Nodding her head, Lisbon accepted his words at face value as they finished their meal in silence each lost in their respective thoughts. While she was consumed with readjusting to being home and the unfounded fears threatening to overwhelm her even in such a familiar place, Lisbon suspected Jane was merely happy things had gone as well as they had so far. That he'd not had to deal with another bout of hysteria yet again. He'd already done more than his fair share of that over the last few days.

She hadn't even been able to dress herself to come home without his assistance.

Raising her chin, Lisbon was surprised to find Jane studying her every move with an inscrutable expression. She resisted the urge to offer a penny for his thoughts as she doubted that would be a wise move. She might not want to know. It was much safer to flash a much too transient smile and let sleeping dogs lie.

"You cooked, I'll clean." Lisbon said as she made to push her chair back and quickly learned the error of her ways at the sharp pain shooting through her side. "On second thought…."

"I'll take care of this." Jane rose easily to his feet and gently eased her chair out from under the table. "Get comfortable on the couch and I'll join you in a few minutes."

"I think I'll do that." Lisbon agreed as she watched Jane grab their empty plates. "My ribs weren't hurting…."

"Don't lie to either of us." Jane interrupted. "Your ribs have been hurting like hell all day even if you haven't shown it. You're much too stubborn for your own good. We both know that."

"I didn't want you to make me take a pain pill." Lisbon rose slowly to her feet. "I don't like how muzzy they make me feel."

Or how they took the edge off of everything to the degree she could almost pretend the last several weeks had never happened. That drug induced haze was far too tempting to risk flirting with at the moment. It would be much too easy to deaden the emotional pain as thoroughly as she deadened the pain in her ribs. Much too easy and that wouldn't be smart for anyone involved.

The truth was pretty cut and dried from Lisbon's perspective.

The quicker she faced the monster in the darkness, the quicker she would be back at work where she belonged.

And the faster she'd get her guns back.

Their absence made her feel naked and much too vulnerable.

At the moment her service weapon and badge, both recovered from Volker's lair, were securely locked away at the CBI until she returned to Active Duty. Jane had effectively hidden all the rest of her firearms. At least he'd confiscated the ones in her bedroom and probably here in her den as well as she'd already looked. How the bastard had found every last one, Lisbon wasn't sure. He must have scoped out every nook and cranny of her house over the years.

What she did know was the three pistols stashed in her car, the one in her bedside drawer, and the one hidden in the drawer of the end table by her couch were nowhere to be found. While it wasn't that big a deal at the moment considering she wasn't feeling emotionally stable enough to be playing with firearms anyway, Jane wasn't leaving the house without telling her where her fire power was stashed. She'd wring his neck if he didn't.

She wouldn't be defenseless if any of Volker's men decided to drop by when she was home alone or even when Jane was. She knew the CBI and the local PD's had done a pretty thorough job of rounding up the rest of the gang. That many of Volker's men had been willing to squeal quite loudly on the rest of their cohorts in return for a deal had gone a long way in aiding the cause.

However, while Bertram and his team were positive they'd rounded up all of the rats fleeing the sinking ship, Lisbon wasn't as sure. It was Thomas Volker they were talking about. He wasn't supposed to get out the first time around and look what happened. Until he was well and truly locked under the jailhouse, she considered both him and his cohorts as slippery as greased pigs and about as easy to catch.

"I'm not going to make you do anything you don't want to do." Jane carried the plates into the kitchen as he watched Lisbon carefully make her way towards the couch and gingerly sink down in the corner before rolling on her back with her head on the pillows.

Loading the dishwasher, he removed the cookies from the oven to cool before reaching into the closest kitchen cabinet to remove a couple of glasses. Plundering another cabinet he removed an amber colored bottle. Pouring a couple of generous slugs in each glass, he returned the bottle to the cabinet knowing there was enough left over for two more liberal drinks and that was it.

He'd meant what he said when he told Lisbon he'd emptied the house of booze and why. He hadn't lied. He'd brought this single bottle over last night figuring they'd dispose of it tonight.

Turning, Jane headed across the kitchen to join Lisbon in the den.

"Here." He offered her one of the small glasses half full of rich bronze liquid.

"I thought you got rid of all of this?" Lisbon motioned to her glass.

"I did." Jane said quietly as he sat on the couch. "All but this which is the last of a 30 year old Single Malt I had at my place."

"So it's okay for you to drown your sorrows; but, not me?" Lisbon wasn't sure whether to laugh or smack him for his impertinence.

"I rarely drown my sorrows as you already know." Jane said quietly taking a sip of his Scotch. He didn't say "never" which would be an outright lie and they both knew it. But "rarely" was as good a word as any for those few and far between pity parties he indulged in on a certain anniversary every year. Bouts he suspected had finally come to their natural end. "This is what's left of the bottle I bought last year for a poker game with the boys. As the stakes were high, their liquor consumption reflected their stress level. These two glasses are all that was left."

Actually all that was left of the _second_ bottle but he wasn't sharing that.

Nor was he sharing there were a couple more drinks where those came from.

Lisbon would find out soon enough if he decided to share.

"Do I need to ask who won?" Lisbon took a sip from her glass savoring the smoky peat flavor permeating her tongue.

"Who do you think?" Jane snorted hiding the fact it had been a very difficult game to win as his fellow players were _all _adept at cheating.

He'd just been better at reading the various tells.

"I take you didn't partake of your offering but they did?" Lisbon smirked at the thought only a complete idiot got inebriated or even tipsy for that matter while playing poker with Patrick Jane.

"I may have partaken of a glass or two." Jane said. "It was a long game."

"Right; but, you hardly lost control of your senses." Lisbon finished for him.

"I didn't get soused if that's what you're asking." Jane agreed. "I didn't get remotely tipsy for that matter. A man's got to keep his wits about him if he wants to win in a game like that."

"You were all cheating." Lisbon said with confidence suspecting she knew the group Jane played with.

"You could say that." Jane winked at her. "I just cheated better."

"How much was the take?" Lisbon's curiosity got the better of her as she carefully resettled into her end of the couch with her bare feet resting on Jane's lap as she often did.

"Fifty grand." Jane admitted knowing Lisbon knew he occasionally indulged in some less than legal back room poker games with some fairly high rollers.

"What did you do with it?" Lisbon hoped he'd stuffed his ill gotten gains into an account somewhere to save for a rainy day.

She'd figured out over the years that, in spite of appearances, Jane had serious cash squirreled away. A nest egg he'd only been adding to over the past decade considering he didn't spend that much of his salary any given month. Maybe he couldn't get his hands on a million dollars free and clear at the drop of a hat. Or maybe he could as she'd never been sure exactly how much Jane was worth. However, she'd bet he was still quite comfortable by her estimation. Besides, he had Malibu and all the offers trickling in on the place to fall back on if he ever decided to sell and that was a healthy sum from what he'd intimated.

Taking a sip of Whisky, Lisbon silently admitted she'd been totally amazed by the number of people still willing to pay what the house was worth in spite of the murders happening there.

Or, more disturbingly, because of the murders that happened there.

"Tossed it into that account you hope I have." Jane confirmed her suspicions.

"Good." Lisbon twirled her glass. "I'm glad to know you don't give everything away."

"Why would I do that?" Jane suddenly looked as though he was seriously contemplating his next words before he voiced them. "My hopes and desires have changed over the last couple years and a man needs money to live."

"That's good to know." Lisbon sat her glass aside deciding those four words were as close as she'd come to admitting she'd been hoping to hear something like that for a while.

That Jane no longer intended ending up in a cell or a coffin when everything the chase was over.

However, what he might mean by his ambiguous commentary wasn't something she was contemplating at the moment.

"I suppose it is." Jane agreed. "Why don't you give me that bottle of polish you hid in your pocket and I'll paint your toenails for you?"

"Really?" Lisbon was surprised she didn't have to ask. "You're going to paint my toenails?"

"Yes, I am." Jane confirmed. "Don't worry. It won't be the first time I've done such a thing."

Jane must be referring to his wife as he hadn't painted her toenails once. She'd never considered the thought. He'd certainly never offered and she'd never asked. She wasn't even sure she'd have let him if he had.

There was something much too personal about the ritual. Too lover like. And while she and Jane were close, they weren't _that_ close. Or they hadn't been.

Lisbon felt her cheeks blush at the thought they were much too intimate now in ways she'd never wanted them to be. Not under the current circumstances. Jane had seen and heard far too much for either of them to ever claim they were only friends. They'd taken the first tentative steps towards crossing that line a while ago at _Trevor's. _Without any of the rest that followed.

"I'm not worried." Lisbon handed Jane the bottle. "I trust you."

They both knew she was talking about far more than a couple of coats of nail polish.

"As you should and I trust you." Jane sat the bottle of polish on the coffee table as he rose to his feet. "I'll be back in a few. I need to change."

Cooking, drinking Whisky, and talking while still dressed for the office was one thing. Playing with blood red nail lacquer was another. He wasn't ruining a perfectly good suit that way. Even if he was eagerly anticipating the smelly ritual he'd never wanted to perform for anyone but his wife until now.

And, yes, Lisbon was right. There _was_ something much too intimate about polishing her nails. Not because of the act itself, because it was them.

Making his way upstairs to the guest room, Jane changed into his pajamas and hung his suit back in the closet. He might as well get ready for bed. Lisbon had. Neither of them was likely to be leaving the house today. They had plenty of food, movies, and reading material. Her prescriptions were filled. There was no one she needed to see. It was a safe bet they were in for the night. Detouring by the linen closet, he confiscated one of Lisbon's rattiest towels before honing in on the right top drawer of her bathroom cabinet. Finding what he wanted, he nabbed the gel toe spacers before heading back downstairs.

"Lisbon, seriously, caterpillars?" Jane wiggled the odd contraptions with the cute little smiling caterpillar faces in her direction.

"You're a dead man." Lisbon grumbled knowing her expression was genuinely mortified. Leave it to Jane to discover her secret quirk. She got a kick out of cheesy critter toe spacers. She didn't have to ask if he'd found the rest. She had the green caterpillars, a pink piggy set, and her cows were blue. What could she say? They'd all come in a pack together. Resigned to his teasing, she shot Jane the "look" as he sat down and spread the towel over his lap before gently settling her feet on the terry cloth surface. "I'm not going to ask how you know I have toe spacers in the first place as I don't think I'll like the answer."

"The same way I know everything." Jane admitted as he shook the bottle of nail polish. "Besides, every woman who polishes her toes has toe spacers of one kind or another though most aren't nearly as cute. They suit you…Saint Teresa and her gel menagerie. Kind of like St. Francis and his animals."

"Shush, Jane." Lisbon rolled her eyes in disgust. "As for that whole knowing everything bit, you've been snooping around when I wasn't looking." Lisbon watched him expertly paint her big toe nail with practiced ease. "I ought to kick your ass for that."

"If I hadn't before, I'm afraid I did when I was packing your bag for the hospital." Jane admitted in a tone conveying he'd been giving her home the Jane Treatment for a number of years as he moved on to her second toe.

"I really should shoot you, you know?" Lisbon resisted the urge to pull her foot away. "But, I won't. You're doing too good a job at that."

She tipped her head in the direction of her feet enjoying the pampering. If she was really lucky, Jane might throw a nice foot massage into the package. She thought she still had some peppermint foot oil under her sink.

"I used to paint Angela's nails when she was pregnant with Charlotte Anne." Jane continued carefully plodding along applying the brilliant crimson to the ends of her toes. "My wife had beautiful feet and I'm afraid she was far too fond of displaying them in sandals. As she couldn't see her toes for her tummy, it was either get very good at all of this or become a silent partner in the local day spa. We decided we enjoyed the time together instead and I really didn't mind."

Letting the rare personal glimpse pass as she knew he wanted, Lisbon filed that thought away in the secret box in her head holding the rare Jane treasures he'd let slip on occasion over the years. He didn't talk about his family often; but, when he did, she clung to every word. There was something poignant about those conversations. Raw and revealing.

"A man of hidden talents, huh?" Lisbon asked instead. "What else you been holding out on me?"

"Wouldn't you like to know?" Jane quipped exactly as she'd expected.

"You know, I think I would." Lisbon admitted knowing she was blushing at Jane's cheeky grin.

"I think you will soon enough." Jane lightly rubbed her foot reassuringly.

Studying her toes, Lisbon bit back the urge to remind Jane he'd been a good husband. She's seen so many glimpses of that truth over the years. But, as he didn't feel the same, that particular conversation never went well. She'd just silently appreciate his past was making her present so much easier than it should be for a lot of different reasons instead. Watching Jane recap the polish and set it aside, Lisbon was surprised at how little time it had taken to apply the double coat and how well he'd actually done with it.

"Maybe I will." Lisbon glanced up noting the look in his eye signaling maybe she'd decided the evening was progressing perfectly a little too soon.

If he stayed true to his usual MO, Jane was about to say something she wouldn't like.

"Lisbon, I saw the tape." Jane said quietly into the silence as he began massaging her right foot with the peppermint foot oil he'd swiped from her bathroom when he'd changed clothes.

"What tape is that?" She should have known Jane was going to lull her into a sense of calm before bursting her peaceful bubble.

"The one you never wanted me to see." Jane held onto the foot she would have gladly pulled away in spite of his magical fingers.

"I didn't want you to see any of them." Lisbon admitted. "Especially not the one I think you're talking about."

"It's a good thing Volker didn't feel the same or we wouldn't have found you in time." Jane resisted reminding her that his recognizing the wallpaper in that old photograph Van Pelt found was the same as the wallpaper in the videos was what set her rescue in motion in the first place.

While he was confident she was at one of the locations he'd pinpointed, it would have taken much longer to coordinate _three _strikes than it had the one. If that had happened, they would have been too late. She'd have been in far worse shape than they'd found her. Lisbon had seriously pushed the envelope those last few days and Volker had been escalating in violence without the help she was giving him exactly as he'd expected.

"I know." Lisbon agreed. "It doesn't mean I have to like it."

"No, you don't; but, you do have to accept it." Jane watched her eyes close not sure if she was reacting to his words or the way his fingers were pressing against the ball of her foot.

"Fine." Lisbon snapped deciding to get this over with. "Exactly which tape did you see?"

"Which one do you think?" Jane asked.

"Where Volker forced me to watch him abusing Emma Sands." Not wanting the confirmation, Lisbon refused to look at him.

"That would be the one." Jane said quietly knowing Lisbon wouldn't like the thought of him watching her completely break down through that marathon of horror.

She cried, so what?

He'd cried as well with far less reason.

That didn't mean either of them were weak.

Just human unlike Thomas Volker.

"What do you want me to say?" Lisbon asked. "I'm sorry I fell apart?"

"Why would I want that?" Jane looked her in the eyes. "I spent the three days you wouldn't see anyone watching that tape as well as the rest of them. I saw what he did to those women and how glad they were when he finally ended their existence. None of them would have ever come back from the torment and I think they knew it. You were justified in reacting as you did. I certainly don't think any less of you for it. I may have broken down a time or two myself."

"There wasn't any reason for you to watch those videos." Lisbon said quietly. "You'd already seen enough."

"There was every reason for me to watch those videos. I'm part of the case." Jane reminded her. And, like it or lump it, he would be taking the stand. He had a lot to say that he hoped would seal Volker's fate. "For the record, Lisbon, as I know you didn't see the rest of those tapes nor are you likely to, Volker was kind to Emma compared to some of the others."

"And to what he intended for me." Lisbon said quietly.

"Yes, I think so." Jane agreed. "None of those women had done anything to him."

"And I had." Lisbon said. "What do you want me to say? To admit I can't pretend it happened to someone else anymore as much as I've tried? That I know it wasn't you touching me even if I chose to image it was? Well, I can't and I do so you don't have to worry about me running from the truth instead of facing it. I don't really have a choice in the matter."

Not now that she was out of Volker's clutches and drug free.

The nightmares wouldn't let her.

"Good. But, you still need to talk about it and, as I'm the designated listener, now is as good a time as any to start. Tell me what you were thinking and feeling all while Volker held you hostage. Get the poison out instead of holding it in. What happened was every bit as unspeakable as you think it was so stop telling yourself it wasn't. That you're a cop doesn't make what he did any easier for you to handle and it shouldn't. It's time to stop the denial."

"You aren't going to let this rest are you?" Lisbon shook her head knowing Jane much too well.

"You don't want me to." Jane called her on the lie she kept telling herself. "Teresa, it's okay to say how much you really want to kill the bastard and how everything would go away if you could. We both know that isn't true; but, it's okay if you tell me you feel that way. You have that right.

I feel that way, too." Jane hadn't meant to admit that last part; but, it was true.

If he thought he could get away with walking into Solitary and blowing Volker away, he would. No, not blow him away…knick an artery. Let him bleed out slowly knowing he was dying and there was nothing anyone could do to save him. Jane knew he would watch the crimson pool on the floor without the slightest bit of guilt. He'd probably kick the body when he was done.

Volker deserved to die with the same compassion with which he'd killed.

Unfortunately, Lisbon would be royally put out if he got himself thrown in jail again.

"Fine, I really want to kill the bastard. Not just for myself; but, for what he did to Emma and all the rest of those women." Women whose names she didn't even know. "I can't talk, Jane. Not like this."

And she was going to talk as much as she'd resisted the idea.

Jane had a way of making people do that.

Of creating a strong compulsion to say and do things they didn't want to do. It was one of the not-so-secret weapons in Jane's formidable arsenal she truly appreciated. It was also one that had come in handy over the years. And one he'd used on her much too often like now.

"Would this make it better?" Lying back on the couch, Jane opened his arms.

"I think so." Lisbon agreed as she gingerly made her way up Jane's body to nestle against his chest.

Feeling his arms lightly encircling her, Lisbon felt him bring his left leg up on the couch before shifting them into a more comfortable position. Settling into her favorite spot tucked neatly beneath his chin, she decided she was going to miss these moments when they were gone. There was something about being in Jane's arms that made her feel safe and protected…As though nothing going on out there could touch her here.

It was a pleasant illusion she didn't want to lose.

"Better?" Jane asked as he stared at the ceiling knowing Lisbon was gathering her thoughts.

"Better." Lisbon said as she closed her eyes finding comfort in the familiarity of her protector.

"Good." Jane waited patiently to see what she would say.

"He held me while we watched that video… and he touched me." Lisbon opened her eyes confronting the memory. "Inappropriately." She didn't feel the need to paint a graphic picture as Jane was much too familiar with where Volker liked to put his hands and what he liked to do with them. They ways he liked to touch her making instinctively turn in on herself. Lisbon cringed at the thought they both were. "While he explained everything he was doing to that girl and how much he enjoyed doing it. How gratifying he found her terror and pain. It was horrifying…She wasn't a person to him.

She was a thing to torment as he pleased.

But, none of that was true. Emma wasn't a "her," Jane. She was a young woman with a name and a long life ahead of her. A life she should have gotten to live."

If only she hadn't tangled with a serial killer.

"Just like you." Jane said quietly. "You're a young woman with a name and a long life ahead of you. A life, unlike Emma, you're going to get to live."

"Thanks to you." Lisbon curled into him a little closer feeling the arm surrounding her tightening perceptively at her action.

"Mostly thanks to you for staying strong enough to buy us the time we needed." Jane corrected her.

"Whatever." Lisbon said as her eyes clouded over. "He had this antique knife with a mother of pearl handle that he liked to play with. He'd press it against my neck and tell me how easy it would be to slit my throat if he wanted. Sometimes he'd nick my skin until I bled just to prove how sharp the blade was.

When he was done, he'd tell me about this table he had down in that room decked out with restraints. That was how he immobilized his victims by binding their hands and feet. But you already know that…You've seen the videos.

He loved to tell me what he was going to do with me.

He said he'd start by binding my hands and feet spread eagle so I couldn't hide from him. Then he was going to cut my clothes away with that knife and remove the collar. He'd start with the bra…cut it right here." Lisbon motioned to the spot between her breasts. "Then he'd cut the panties. After that, he thought he'd start by choking me with that red silk scarf. The one he used before He said he found the way I fought against death highly erotic…The way my body moved excited him."

Shuddering at what she'd left unsaid, Lisbon caught the pained expression in Jane's eyes.

"I keep forgetting you went through it, too." Lisbon said quietly. "None of this can be easy for you."

"I didn't go through anything, Teresa. I watched you going through it which is not the same thing." Jane corrected her. "I'm not going to lie to you. My world was suddenly all right when I carried you through that door. None of the rest of it mattered once I had you back. It still doesn't. All I care about is you getting well."

"You really mean that."

"For the thousandth time, I really mean that." Jane agreed. "I just hate seeing you afraid in your own house. Seeing the look on your face saying you weren't comfortable in your own room. That you were seeing what he'd done to you instead of the place you've called home for so long."

"I'm sure it'll get better with time." She certainly hoped it would.

"I'm sure it will." Jane agreed.

"I don't think I want to talk about any of this anymore today. Maybe we'll try again tomorrow. Right now I just want to close my eyes and rest. But, I would like to know why it was so important you tell me you'd seen those videos. They don't have anything to do with me." They had a lot to do with her case as he'd said; but, nothing directly to do with her.

"Because I wanted you to know there's no reason you need to censor what you say to me or wonder what I've seen or haven't seen. Suffice it to say, I've seen it all. Everything he did to you and most of what he did to _them_. There's nothing you can shield me from as there's nothing I can shield you from. Except maybe the foolishness of our co-workers which I assure you I will do when the time comes." Jane reassured her.

"Whatever." This was exactly what she'd been hoping to avoid on her first evening home. "I really don't feel like talking about this anymore."

"Then we won't. Not tonight; but, you need to stop shoving your emotions into a neat little box because you're a cop. Stop telling yourself you shouldn't be as affected as any other woman because you know what to expect. You've had the classes.

In other words, stop being a fool. Cry when you want to. Scream when you want to. Throw things if it'll make you feel better. I won't think any less of you as I've certainly done all of those things and I'm sure I will again before this is over." Jane ignored the warning look in her eyes.

"Shush, Jane." Her tone said she'd had enough.

"Lisbon, you need to know I'm here when you're ready. Whether you want to talk or sneak off to the CBI to beat the hell out of a punching bag or go to a firing range two towns over on the down low, I don't really care. The bottom line is you're not alone." Jane reminded her.

"I know that." Lisbon stared at the ceiling refusing to look at him.

"I'm not sure you do or if you do that you won't still try to go it alone." Jane observed quietly. "As much as you might be more comfortable handling all of this that way, it won't work and you know it. You might as well give up now and let me in. You're just going to end up doing that before it's over anyway."

"Shush, Jane." Lisbon closed her eyes.

"I don't think I will." Jane watched her eyes flicker open resignedly at his words. "You're pulling a typical Lisbon. You were scared witless when Volker started messing with you; but, I didn't interfere. I let you play it your way and only interceded when you wanted me too. I don't think I'm going to do that this time.

I'm not going to force you into being more graphic than you want before you're ready; but, I'm going to pick at the scabs when I see you plaster one of those stupid "I'm okay" smiles on your face that mean you're burying your emotions in a deep, dark hole instead." Jane told her.

"You can do all of that later." Lisbon said wearily. "At the moment, I'd really like another drink and one of those cookies instead."

"Who drinks Whisky with cookies?" Jane made a face at the thought.

"Then bring me a glass of milk." Lisbon said. "We can have that last drink after we finish dessert. Oh, and don't try to tell me there's nothing left. You've have tossed the bottle in the trash can instead of putting it back in the cabinet as you did if it was empty. I might be out of commission at the moment, but I'm still a damned good cop."

"Yes, you are." Jane said as he lifted Lisbon and settled her at the opposite end of the couch before rising to his feet.

He should have known she'd figure out there was more alcohol in the house and that she'd want more than one drink. Lisbon wasn't above taking the edge off though she never let it go too far. Not with her family history.

Walking into the kitchen he poured two glasses of milk before placing four cookies on a plate and heading back for the den. All in all, he couldn't call the evening a bust. He'd gotten more out of Lisbon than he'd expected and he hadn't had to push all that hard.

Walking back into the den, Jane sat the cookies in front of Lisbon before offering her a glass of milk. Taking his seat beside her, he wasn't surprised when she placed her legs across his lap and held out the plate now bearing three cookies. Smirking at the chocolate smears around her mouth, Jane took a peanut butter chocolate kiss cookie from the plate knowing this was probably the only one he was going to get as Lisbon was already hovering protectively around that plate. She wasn't real good on the concept of sharing. Not when it came to cookies and Red Delicious apples among a few other things.

He guessed it was a good thing there was plenty more where those came from.

#####

Lisbon sat up in her bed with the covers tucked beneath her chin watching Jane take his vest from the hanger in her closet. In a matter of moments he was fully dressed complete with the familiar jacket. Fully dressed and looking far too good for her peace of mind this early in the morning in her humble opinion. Then again, he usually did no matter the time of day.

Turning to face her, he raised a brow at the pensive look on her face.

"Are you going to be okay?" He asked quietly.

"I'll be fine." Lisbon said the words he expected to hear.

"I won't be gone that long." Jane promised.

"You'll be gone as long as Bertram says you'll be gone and we both know it." Lisbon reminded him. "The real question is will you be okay?"

He didn't want to leave her and she really didn't want him to go.

Jane had tried his best to get out of going to the office when the call came in this morning. Obviously, he couldn't as it was Bertram himself. In spite of having argued his side tooth and nail combined with multiple outright refusals. It seemed the case was much too high profile to have anything less than the CBI's best. That Lisbon was still out on medical leave was a serious blow to the Bureau. He couldn't afford to excuse Jane, too. Not after a month of leaving him alone. This case couldn't be entrusted to any other team. Fortunately, Cho was a capable TL and he knew Jane would be on his best behavior.

Lisbon wouldn't accept anything less.

"Why would you think I wouldn't be?" Jane asked as he dragged a comb through his wayward curls.

"The victim's a young girl who'd be about Charlotte Anne's age." Lisbon said quietly. "I know you, Jane. You're going to be anything but okay with this case…Then you'll come home to deal with this."

Lisbon made a gesture encompassing "this."

"Damn it, Lisbon, you aren't a "this" and I want to be here." Jane corrected her as he sat on the edge of the bed. "I wouldn't be leaving you if I had a choice.

As for any dealing with "this" as you put it, I'm not the one who'll be dealing with anything. You will and you'll be doing it alone without my help. For the record, that isn't something I like or the way I think it should be. It isn't the agreement I struck with the higher ups."

"Shush, Jane. They've given us a month longer than I expected." Lisbon calmed him with the feel of her hand over his. "Bertram wouldn't be calling you now if it weren't necessary. He'd be letting you consult from home as he has been. Unfortunately, we've got a Sacramento Councilwoman's teen aged daughter killed in her bed with all the windows and doors locked. That sounds like a Jane case to me so he doesn't have a whole lot of choice."

"Yeah, well, it's not as complicated as it seems." Jane said. "I've looked at the photographs of that nineteenth century mausoleum they call a house and I'm sure we'll find a secret passage or two built in the walls. Since Cho's already sent what they had over to your computer, I'm up to speed on the case. I called Van Pelt to track down the original blue prints while I was downstairs making coffee."

"Wow." Lisbon looked into his eyes. "It sounds like you're ready to get back to work."

"I'm ready to get back to you and I haven't even left." Jane softly amended her assumption.

"I'll be okay." Lisbon reassured him.

"Like you've been okay the past month?" Jane silently reminded her there was a reason he was getting dressed in her bathroom.

She'd not made it through the first night alone or any night since.

However, he blamed himself for her problems. He'd pushed harder than he should have that first night and he'd pushed her a few times sense. Lisbon was determined to sweep her experience under the proverbial rug and he was equally determined she wasn't. For the moment he was winning and Lisbon was making remarkable strides. She was already beginning to look and sound more like her old self. She'd even begun calling the team at the office occasionally and she'd told Bertram off when he'd sent the CBI shrink over for a house call a week ago.

Cramming his wallet in his pocket, Jane mulled that first night when he'd cooked hamburgers and plied her with thirty year old Scotch Whisky. Lisbon had eventually opened up; but, at a hefty price. He'd left his comfy bed in the guest room upon hearing the first whimpering signs of the nightmares he'd known were coming. Entering Lisbon's room, he'd slipped into the bed beside her and carefully encircled her small form in his.

Never waking, she'd immediately gentled upon sensing his protecting presence. Satisfied Lisbon was sleeping; he'd allowed himself to join her in slumber only to awaken early the next morning to discover neither of them had moved in the night. When she'd opened her eyes a short while later, he'd had some explaining to do.

Not unexpectedly, Lisbon had accepted his presence in her bed without a fight that morning and every morning since. Only now he ended his night in her bed as well as starting his morning there. Not that anything scandalous happened. Nothing beyond a few snores, some heavy drooling, and a mostly innocent snuggle or two.

"Shush, Jane." Lisbon leaned her forehead against his before leaning back to look in his eyes. "I've got to start somewhere and you need a break from being cooped up in here with me all these weeks."

"I haven't been cooped up." And he hadn't been. "Let's see, I've gone to the grocery store, stopped by the CBI a number of times, gone to the Farmer's Market, and the Library to get those books you wanted. Oh, and I went out to buy those videos on your Wish List."

"Yeah, and you were gone an hour tops, maybe two, for all of those things." Lisbon reminded him. "Even I can manage an hour or two without a babysitter."

There was a slightly bitter tone to her voice he didn't like.

"Teresa, stop it. I'm where I want to be." Jane cast his eyes over to glance at Lisbon's alarm clock suddenly realizing it was much later than he'd thought. "And as much as it pains me to say it, I've got to go. I have a pow-wow with Bertram and Cho in half an hour. There are leftovers in the fridge for lunch and I'm only a phone call away. I'll drop everything if you need me."

"I know." Lisbon promised knowing she wasn't calling Jane if it killed her.

He had a job to do.

And he'd be home when he got home.

She'd just have to accept that was the way it was and how it had to be.

"I'll be home as soon as I can." And much quicker than Bertram expected or his name wasn't Patrick Jane.

"I'll be here." Lisbon closed her eyes enjoying the slight brush of his lips against hers before she watched him walk out the door.

Sliding back down under the covers, Lisbon settled comfortably on her pillows not ready to get up yet. If she was lucky she'd go back to sleep for a little while. It would make the time pass quicker until Jane's return. Once she woke up, she was going to have a look at the rest of those videos Jane had hidden on the computer in her office. The one's showing Volker torturing and killing the rest of his victims. The one's he thought she didn't know he had.

It was time to put a picture to all the words that monster had whispered in her ear. To see what he'd intended for her and how the nightmares still haunting her truly measured up. It was time to confront her darkest fears and lay them to rest. Once that was done, she would be on her way to getting healthy again. The sooner that happened the sooner she'd be back with Jane and her team. She honestly couldn't wait.

Having made her plans for the rest of the day, Lisbon closed her eyes and drifted off to sleep.


	11. Chapter 10

Note: I have pulled CHAPTER TEN which was posted earlier from the sight.

To set the record straight, I didn't make a mistake and repost the same chapter. I knew exactly what I was doing which was going back to the original format of one chapter being more through Lisbon's eyes and the next more through Jane's.

Obviously, going back to the earlier it didn't work or I didn't do it well enough. No biggie. Life's about risks that don't always work. I'll just forge ahead with the changed format and the next chapter.

In the meantime, as I've already said I pulled the chapter. There will eventually be a very different chapter when it's done.

All I do request is you not ask that I check what I post. I do check what I'm posting multiple times both before and after I post it. I have accidentally posted the wrong chapter in the past. I don't want to do that again.

~Calla


	12. Chapter 11

Guys, this is the chapter I deleted.

I had 4 reviews thinking I reposted the previous chapter before Sorchauna got that this chapter was actually from Jane's POV. My initial feeling was I'd failed in my intent which was to portray JANE's feelings is why I pulled it. Not because I'm a drama queen. I just don't see the point of leaving up something that doesn't work when I'm fully capable of writing something that does! :)

However, after Sorchauna let me know she enjoyed the chapter and that I should simply put an A/N up letting everyone know it is basically the preceding chapter from Jane's POV I decided to take her advice. I did put a lot of time and effort into writing it. Maybe it didn't fail quite as badly as my initial impression.

Please note there are ALOT of similarities to the preceding chapter - it's just from Jane's POV rather than mostly from Lisbon's.

Please read if you'd like or wait for the next instead. It's coming soon.

~Calla

######

Standing in front of Lisbon's apartment, Jane took a moment to study his companion. She was nervous. Not visibly so to a casual observer; but, to him, it was obvious in the almost indiscernible trembling of her form. Running his hand down her arm, Jane offered comfort the only way he could. Whatever uncomfortable thoughts were going through her mind were quieted by his familiar touch.

"You ready?" Jane asked getting the short, sharp "I'm okay." nod he expected and nothing else.

Inserting the key in the lock, Jane unlocked Lisbon's apartment and opened the door. Motioning her inside before locking the door behind them, he watched her absorbing the details of the home she never thought she'd see again. At first glance, there shouldn't be a whole lot of adjusting for her to do. Jane knew better. He'd learned long ago that nothing was ever as it seemed. However, he would confidently say, he'd done nothing that should cause Lisbon issue. He'd left everything exactly as it was the day she'd been taken.

Well, except for the bouquet of flowers now centered on her dining table.

And the missing haphazard pile of clothes she'd left on her bed. Who knew Lisbon ever had that much trouble deciding what to wear? She was always so unerringly decisive…except, perhaps, when it came to him.

Jane would be the first to admit, his antics would give anyone pause including his "Boss".

Especially his "Boss" and he wasn't talking about Bertram, LaRoche, or Minelli.

Jane liked to think her indecision that day had had more to do with their upcoming "date" than the Press Conference she'd shared with Bertram. Lisbon had suffered through plenty of those aggravations in the past and wouldn't have been the least bit nervous. Not to the degree she'd leave multiple fancier than usual outfits waiting to be returned to their hangers when she returned later that night. That wasn't typical Lisbon behavior as he well knew.

While he could be wrong; he honestly didn't think he was.

He'd carefully rehung every garment the first night he'd slept in her bed.

Neatly returning every blouse, jacket, and pants to her closet helped him regain his sanity in a way he hadn't foreseen on a dismal evening he feared all was lost. When he'd been sure they'd never find Lisbon in time. When he wasn't sure they'd find her at all. While positive she'd appreciate his effort, Jane was sure she wouldn't be nearly as tolerant of the indolent perusal through her closet that followed. He'd been amazed to find a dress or two hidden in the heap and wondered briefly what had happened to his Lisbon.

She didn't do dresses.

But, she'd considered it for him.

Certainly never for Bertram or that despised PR moment.

No way.

Jane was glad she hadn't forced herself to wear a dress. She'd been far more comfortable in that fancy suit. Relatively calm, not so cool, and not so collected; but, she'd been lovely anyway.

"Where are your things?" Lisbon asked as her eyes lighted appreciatively on the flowers for the very first time.

She was clueless what they meant; but, she was sure each one had been handpicked with a special meaning in mind. Jane was goofy that way. A rose couldn't just be a rose. However, she wasn't about to ask. Not now. Maybe she would later. When she was better able to handle whatever Jane was trying to say. He'd certainly tell her then. No matter when she finally got around to asking. He was good that way.

"Upstairs in the guest room." Jane said as he dropped her suitcase in the foyer before heading into the kitchen to set the kettle over a burner. "I didn't want things to be messy when you got home."

"You're never messy, Jane." His things were always stacked neatly against a wall when he slept downstairs on her couch which he clearly had no intention of doing tonight. "You're planning on sleeping up there instead of down here…In case of nightmares." Lisbon guessed.

"Something like that." Jane agreed not caring for the too vulnerable look on her face.

She didn't like what he was doing. Yet, she accepted his actions were for the best.

Snapping out of it, Jane knew what they both needed: a nice cup of tea and a glass of something bubbly and sweet for Lisbon. Pouring her a glass of Cherry Cola before dumping his tea leaves, Jane handed off his offering. Watching her hesitantly take a sip of her drink, he decided Lisbon looked like she needed nothing so much as a shower, lunch, and bed in that order.

"Why don't you take a shower while I fix lunch?" He casually made the suggestion as he took his first sip of tea.

"That sounds like a plan." Lisbon agreed.

Jane was pleased that Lisbon took him up on it without a fight. She could be quite stubborn when the mood struck. He wasn't, however, all that surprised when she turned down his offer to accompany her up. Navigating her home alone was something she needed to do alone in spite of viewing the familiar domicile through different eyes.

"You have a good forty-five minutes to an hour so make the most of it." It didn't normally take that long to prepare what he had in mind.

However, today he planned on taking his time and giving Lisbon hers.

Watching Lisbon head for the stairs, Jane removed the fixings for lunch from the refrigerator and dumped them on the counter. Hastily reading the instructions on the bag of spicy sweet potato fries, Jane turned the oven to the proper temperature to preheat. He was baking cookies as well; but, those would have to wait until the oven cooled. Dumping the bag of chocolate kisses on the counter beside the package of pre-made peanut butter cookie squares, he did a mental countdown of how long everything would take to prepare. Spreading fries across the baking sheet and shoving them in the oven, Jane decided he had things well in hand. Lunch was the last thing he needed to sweat.

He had far more important concerns at the moment than what they were going to eat.

Standing at the bottom of the stairs, Jane wasn't surprised to see Lisbon standing frozen on the landing carefully considering her next move. She seriously considered checking out the guestroom to her left where he'd put his things before making for her bedroom on the right instead.. Exactly why she'd wanted to go to his room instead of hers was puzzling. Perhaps she wanted to make sure he was really staying there instead of downstairs as he'd initially intended. Or, more truthfully, she'd probably considered checking out his space as a valid excuse to buy time before embracing the inevitable and checking out hers.

Standing a safe distance back in the hall, Jane watched Lisbon reach into her bedroom to flip the light switch before taking that first tentative step into the room that was no longer her sanctuary or the safe haven it had always been. Not liking the hesitancy in her steps, Jane decided to watch her for the next few minutes. He wanted to make sure she acclimated okay. That there wasn't a repeat of that earlier experience at the hospital where she'd been on the verge of completely losing it yet again.

He didn't give a second thought to the probability Lisbon would verbally gut him if she discovered him lurking along the perimeter. Nor to the possibility she might punch him in the nose as she'd done in the past. That reaction would be even less welcome as it physically hurt and he was a wimp when it came to pain.

However, none of that really mattered.

Only the reality no one should be afraid in their own home did.

Catching her shiver as she glanced briefly in the direction of her bed, Jane didn't have to ask what she was thinking. He already knew. He'd seen the videos.

It was on a bed similar to that one Volker had undressed her and whisked her clothes away. Run his hands over her unconscious body inappropriately. Where, later, he'd done the same and more to her very conscious one. It was on a bed similar to that out that he'd taped those live stream videos of the very painful things he'd done to the last person she'd ever want to see her suffering such indignities…To see a monster touching her much too intimately and laughing at her repulsed responses…To see the hopelessness and fear reflected in eyes that should never show such things.

He'd watched every agonizing moment and wanted to kill the bastard from the start. Rip him limb from limb with his two bare hands until there was nothing left of an entity so totally void of humanity but bits of blood and gore.

He'd have done it, too.

Had he gotten to Volker in time and there been no one present to stop him.

As it was, he'd settle for cleaning up his handiwork. For eventually wiping away every touch, sight, and sound. It would take time and patience; but, Jane knew he could do it…If Lisbon would let him.

Somehow, he thought she would.

He could be very persuasive when he set his mind to something.

Hearing her pained moan and seeing her wince as she slowly shrugged out of her jacket, Jane knew he should leave. It would be the gentlemanly thing to do. Things were getting down to the wire and he certainly couldn't offer to help her _undress_ as much as he wanted to. It wasn't the same as helping her dress. He should just leave instead as he'd already thought. He should, but he wouldn't. He wasn't feeling all that honorable at the moment.

Seeing how well Lisbon's injuries were healing and how she handled being alone was far more important than coddling her feminine sensibilities.

From what he'd seen so far, she wasn't doing as well on either count as he'd hoped.

From his hidey hole in the shadows, Jane watched Lisbon look down as she began unbuttoning her blouse with visibly trembling hands. Being in her room by herself was shaking her up more than she wanted to admit. She'd be mortified if she knew he was spying on her absorbing every nuance of her struggle. Somehow, Jane couldn't find it in himself to feel as ashamed as he knew he should be. Once he was sure Lisbon had regained her self-control, he'd go downstairs and finish lunch. Regained her self-control or started removing her lingerie…whichever came first.

Watching over her was one thing.

Preying on her naked vulnerability was another.

He wouldn't do that to Lisbon even in the name of protecting her.

It would make him no better than Volker.

Watching her hang her blouse in the closet, Jane admired the slender lines of her back as Lisbon slowly removed her pants and hung them up.

What he didn't like was the other things having nothing to do with toned lines or silky soft skin.

Staring at the cuts and bruises still marring her body, Jane resisted the urge to make a special trip to the penitentiary for some one on one time with Tommy Volker. He was sure he could persuade the guards to look the other way for however long it took to beat the hell out of Thomas. Maybe worse, if time permitted. He doubted all that much persuasion would be needed. Lisbon was one of their own. They'd probably help him if he'd let them.

Jane settled for evaluating her injuries instead.

While a wide expanse of skin was on display, the matching lilac bra and panties Lisbon wore were no more revealing than a modest biking and not as sexy in a lot of respects. The set was pretty and feminine; but, mercifully, nothing overtly tantalizing against her fair skin.

Unfortunately, at the moment, the color also accentuated the disgusting purples, yellows, and blues in the mottled bruises covering her cracked ribs and other places. Those bruises were particularly distasteful to Jane as he'd carefully cataloged the events causing each one in his Memory Palace to be used against their perpetrator in a Court of Law when the moment came. In the end, Volker was going to realize he'd made two major mistakes orchestrating his downfall.

If he'd let things be, he might have beat most of the charges against him if not all of them. The CBI had a good case; but, it wasn't airtight. They'd had quite a few formidable things against them. The first was he was Thomas Volker and no one wanted to believe rich, powerful, handsome, charming philanthropists were a scant half rung above Satan on the scale of random evilness. The second was his lawyers were just that good. Among the best money could buy. There were probably a few other things he could drum up; but, why bother? Things hadn't worked out that way. Volker had chosen another path.

The one where he'd tormented and taunted him with weeks of Lisbon torture. Not the brightest move Tommy had ever made. The tormenting Patrick Jane part he could have lived with. He'd been living with psychotic torment for years. It was the other two bringing Volker down.

No one tortured his Lisbon and got away with it. No one taunted he was powerless to stop it.

As Volker had eventually learned to his disgust, Patrick Jane was far from powerless. Not when it came to Teresa Lisbon. He'd move heaven and hell to get to her and he'd challenge the devil himself if he believed in such a twisted entity. He did, however, believe in Evil. Volker made a good argument for its existence. He certainly epitomized it.

Turning his attention back to Lisbon, Jane noted the rest of the damage indicating her tormentor had had way too much fun at Lisbon's expense. Particularly off putting was the bruising on her neck evocatively addressing Volker's fascination with long silk scarves and envelope pushing asphyxiation games. He'd enjoyed those about as much as Lisbon had. He'd been fully convinced Volker was going to carry it too far. While not his intent, it would be too late for his victim when he did.

Fortunately, they'd freed Lisbon before that could happen.

Watching the subject of his thoughts pad into the bathroom, Jane saw her turn on the shower before taking in the wide array of bath products littering her bath. Smiling appreciatively, Lisbon closed the glass door before meandering over to the sink to evaluate her cuts and bruises. Watching her studying a particularly nasty slash above her breast that had required a few stitches, Jane wasn't all that surprised when Lisbon suddenly reached behind her to unfasten her bra. She'd clearly decided, while painful, what she'd done would hurt far less than sliding the hook around to the front as she probably usually did.

Deciding he was pushing his luck watching any longer as Lisbon would be topless soon, Jane crept from his hiding place and headed for the stairs.

Descending lost in thought; he listened carefully for the sound of the shower doors opening overhead. If he didn't miss his guess, she was going to spend a while under that steaming stream of water scrubbing away imaginary mud and grime. If they were both lucky, she wouldn't scrub her skin completely raw. If they weren't, there was a bottle of numbing antiseptic around here somewhere.

Jane decided while Lisbon was potentially indulging in some understandable self-abuse, he'd finish lunch.

Adding Olive Oil to the pan he'd left on the stove, Jane turned the burner on low before grabbing the cutting board from the drawer and the Chef's knife from the block. Placing a large, sweet, onion in the center, he sliced off both ends before peeling the vegetable and cutting it into slices with practiced ease. As easy as it would be to imagine himself slicing and dicing Volker the way he'd tormented his unfortunate victims, Jane wasn't going there. That was a little too demented even for him. There might be the occasional whisper around the water cooler he'd lost that last tenuous hold on sanity; but, there was no reason to give his detractors undeniable proof of it. He found it far more amusing to keep them wondering.

Testing the oil, Jane added the onion to the pan to caramelize. There wasn't that much more he had to do. The rest of the preparations were simple: make the chipotle sauce, cook the hamburger patties, and plop the pre-made peanut butter cookies on a pan to await baking at the proper time. The tomatoes would take a few seconds to slice and the buns a few minutes to toast. All he needed was time which he was sure Lisbon would give him plenty of.

#####

Having allowed Lisbon her companionable lunch, Jane carried two glasses of Single Malt into the den. He fully expected the smart butt comment coming out of her mouth in relation to emptying the house of alcohol and responded accordingly. Giving her the abridged version of that illegal poker game where he'd cleaned house a couple of years ago, he wasn't surprised to see the wheels turning in her head.

While he wasn't all that happy divulging quite so much about his personal life, Jane didn't mind confirming Lisbon's suspicions he was more than comfortable without selling Malibu. Not because he didn't trust her. He did. Because he was carney and that's what carney's did. They held their cards close to their chests. He might have left the carney life; but, it had never left him. That being said, he could bend the code for Lisbon. She'd earned that much. Besides, she worried about him much too much and he didn't like it…especially since there wasn't any reason.

She would learn just that if anything ever happened to him.

He'd promised to have her back a long time ago and he'd meant it in more ways than she knew.

Halting his thoughts, Jane turned his attention back to Lisbon who was saying how glad she was that he didn't give everything away. He couldn't help the disbelieving smile curving his lips. Yes, he'd been fairly generous over the years she'd known him; but, contrary to what she seemed to think he'd _never_ given _everything_ away. Most of it, yes; but, not all. Not in recent years. He'd had other thoughts knocking around in his head for a while and acted accordingly.

Even if he wasn't quite ready to come right out and say exactly what those thoughts were.

He was giving Lisbon a healthy hint in admitting his future plans had changed over the last couple of years and that a man needed money to live. Perhaps a little more hint than she could handle judging by the slightly bug eyed look she was giving him. Deciding he'd let more slip than he should exactly as he'd feared, Jane decided it was time for a turn in conversation.

"Why don't you give me that bottle of polish you hid in your pocket and I'll paint your toenails for you?" The words coming out of his mouth weren't the offer he'd intended to make.

Simply the one he'd known Lisbon was hoping he'd make.

"Really?" Disbelief filled her voice. "You're going to paint my toenails?"

"Yes, I am." He agreed knowing he'd surprised her with his words. "Don't worry. It isn't the first time I've done such a thing."

From the sudden shadows in her eyes, Lisbon realized he was referring to Angela. It was clear she'd never considered such an idea. What she did know was he'd never painted her toenails. He'd never offered and she'd never asked. She wouldn't.

"I'll take your word for it." Lisbon said as she watched him rise to his feet.

"I need to change first." Jane said by way of explanation. "I'll be back soon."

Walking upstairs he quickly changed from his suit into his pajamas as he gathered his thoughts. He hadn't meant to make that offer. It was just that he'd recognized the shape of the bottle in Lisbon's pocket and known she couldn't do her own nails. Not with those damaged ribs. It was obvious she was hoping he'd make the offer he had as she would never ask him to do any such thing. It seemed, in spite of his intentions to the contrary, she'd been right. The words had passed his lips unbidden.

Hanging his suit in the closet, Jane walked into Lisbon's bathroom to grab one of her rattier towels and the peppermint foot oil he knew she kept in the bottom drawer. He might as well grab those squishy green caterpillar thinger-ma-bobbers to scrunch in between her toes while he was at it. He could get a lot of mileage out of teasing her about her silicone menagerie. If nothing else, it would put a little fire in her cheeks and a smile on her lips.

Walking back downstairs, Jane wasn't surprised to find Lisbon exactly where he'd left her. He was mildly surprised at the mellow expression she wore. Largely due, he suspected, to the significant dent she'd made towards emptying her glass while he was gone. Sitting down on the couch, Jane spread the dark blue towel across his lap before turning to smirk at his mark. If Lisbon knew what he had in store for her, she'd smack him.

Settling Lisbon's right foot on the towel and easing the green gel caterpillars between her toes, Jane studied the slender appendage. To be several inches shorter than his late wife, Lisbon had feet almost as large as Angela's and almost as pretty, too. However, he didn't think the pretty part would bother her. The "large" was a different story. Shaking the bottle of polish, he opened it and expertly painted her big toenail.

"I used to paint Angela's nails when she was pregnant with Charlotte Anne." Jane continued carefully plodding along applying the brilliant crimson to the ends of Lisbon's toes. "My wife was quite vain about her feet and I'm afraid she was far too fond of displaying them in sandals to ever let her toenails go. As she couldn't see her toes for her tummy much less reach them after a few months, it was either get very good at this or become a silent partner in the local day spa. We decided we enjoyed the time together instead."

Looking up, Jane knew Lisbon was going to let his personal remarks pass as she always did. She knew that was how he wanted it and she respected his feelings. However, he knew as well that she was holding on to his every word. It wasn't often he let slip such intensely personal things about his life before.

As much as he wanted to believe he was a horrible husband father, Jane knew differently deep in his soul. Yes, ultimately, it was his mouth writing that check his family had so unfairly paid; but, he hadn't known the true depravity of the demon hugging the darkness. No one had. He'd have certainly never opened his mouth had he suspected he was putting his beloved wife and child in danger.

In spite of what some might thing, he wasn't that arrogant.

And while he'd not forgiven himself for his actions, time and Lisbon had cauterized the hemorrhaging edges of that all consuming grief making him want to live again.

"We had a standing Saturday night date with her favorite bottle of polish." Jane said conversationally. "Angela favored nudes and soft shell pinks over blood red crimson or that god forsaken virulent blue you have in your drawer." Jane teased as he painted a second coat over the first.

"Shush, Jane." Lisbon rolled her eyes at his deliberate swipe at her taste in toe nail polish. "I'll have you know Annie gave me that blue polish from her personal stash."

"Well, if Annabeth gave it to you, it must be okay." Jane recanted with a smile.

He liked Lisbon's niece. They had a lot in common. Including the fact both of them doted on her bad assed Auntie Reese.

"You bet it is." Lisbon studied her toes deciding Jane had done an excellent job. "You do good work. I may have to keep you around."

"It's nice to know I have a purpose." Taking a sip from his glass, Jane lightly patted her foot. "A man's got to earn his keep."

"I suppose he does." Lisbon agreed.

"Angela was wearing this bright pink polish I'd bought her a couple of days before on the afternoon Charlotte Anne was born." Jane continued absently unable to stop what he'd so reluctantly begun as Lisbon was clearly interested in hearing anything he was willing to share. "It wasn't her usual color as she favored softer, more neutral shades. But, she'd been in a funk feeling fat and unattractive. It wasn't true; but, reason rarely works with pregnant women. Not when it comes to their weight. My wife was no different. She'd gained a whopping twenty five pounds by the end of her pregnancy and thought it was the end of the world.

I thought she was beautiful. I bought her several bottles of polish and the flowers to match. It seemed to do the trick for a day or two. Long enough for Nature to take its course anyway. When Charlotte was born, everything was suddenly right with Angela's world again." Jane smiled at the lovely memory.

That and the thought Angela hadn't been nearly as hard to please as Lisbon.

For one thing, his wife never, ever expected him to be good. She knew better and accepted him exactly as he was. On second thought, Lisbon was probably about as close as she could get to being the same with the CBI higher ups breathing down her neck. He had gotten her to relax quite a bit over the years.

For another, flowers had fixed about every evil. Angela was the one who'd taught him the Floriography she'd learned from her grandmother. In time, Jane had come to value the challenge of finding just the right blossom or bud to eloquently convey what he wanted to say without a single word. Not that he'd had any problem talking. It was just that he'd enjoyed the change. That, and Angela had enjoyed trying to figure out precisely what he was saying without being told. She'd gotten quite good at deciphering his most complex messages over the years as he had hers.

Trying to outdo each other with flowers had grown into a flirtatious game they'd enjoyed over the years.

"I'm sure she was beautiful." Lisbon agreed.

Having seen pictures of the woman, she couldn't imagine pregnancy made her anything less.

"She was." Deciding her toenails should be dry by now, Jane absently squirted peppermint oil into his palm seeing the surprised delight on Lisbon's face at his action. "I almost missed my daughter's birth. I was in the middle of a reading when the call came through. Angela insisted I finish with my client even though I wanted to leave. She said it would be hours before our daughter was born. I did as she asked and everything would have been fine except there was a major pile-up on the freeway that took three hours to clear away." Jane had a vacant faraway look in his eyes Lisbon wasn't sure she liked.

"There's always a pile-up on the freeway." Lisbon agreed.

"I managed to get to the hospital in time to hold Angela's hand through the last half hour of labor and see my daughter enter the world. While undeniably messy, Charlotte's birth was the most beautiful sight I've seen." Jane admitted.

"Something you'd do again?" Lisbon asked softly unable to stop herself from asking a question she hadn't meant to ask and wasn't sure he'd answer.

"Maybe I would, under the right circumstances." Jane rested his hand on her foot. "What about you?"

Lisbon filed his response away as food for thought. It wasn't something she'd ever seriously considered. That wasn't exactly true. She had, briefly, when she'd become reacquainted with Greg and met his brood. She'd had to give some thought to the life she'd forfeited in bailing on him after the case was over. In the end, she'd agreed with Jane. He wasn't the one.

After that, she really hadn't given marriage or children another thought. She'd been much too busy.

"I don't know." Lisbon answered honestly. "I've never had a kid before."

"Smart ass." Jane rubbed her foot.

"Seriously, I'd have to give it some thought." Lisbon said leaving off the whole "if you were the father I might consider it" running through her head. "Maybe."

"You still have time." Jane stared at her silent television.

"Not a lot." Lisbon wasn't prepared for the strange jolt coming with admitting she truly was running out of time.

She'd been young when she'd made SA at the CBI. But, more than a decade had passed since then. She wasn't so young anymore and she certainly wasn't getting any younger.

"Enough, I'm sure." Jane left it at that as he took a fortifying sip of Whiskey before turning to face Lisbon with that look in his eye that never boded well.

"What's up, Jane?" From the resignation in her eyes, she'd decided to simply tackle whatever he wanted to talk about rather than try to evade it.

It wouldn't do any good any way. Not in the face of Jane's annoying persistence.

"Lisbon, I saw the tape." Jane said quietly as he returned his attention to massaging her foot valiantly trying to ignore the fact he might as well have physically kicked Lisbon in the stomach from the look on her face.

"What tape is that?" Her tone clearly indicated she really didn't want to know.

"The one you never wanted me to see." Jane grasped the foot she tried to pull away.

"You had no right." Lisbon's green eyes bored her displeasure right into his soul. "I didn't want you to see any of them. Especially not the one I think you're talking about."

"It's a good thing Volker didn't feel the same or we wouldn't have found you in time." Sometimes the truth hurt.

"I know." Fortunately Lisbon was a realist. "It doesn't mean I have to like it."

"No, you don't; but, you do have to accept it." Studying her face, Jane acknowledged the moment she accepted his words.

"Fine." She clearly intended getting this over with. "Exactly which tape did you see?"

"Which one do you think?" As much as it pained him to do so, Jane knew there was healing in forcing her to say the words.

"Where Volker forced me to watch him abusing Emma Sands." Clearly pissed at his daring, Lisbon refused to look at him.

"That would be the one." While quiet, Jane deliberately kept his tone more cavalier than he felt stoking the anger rolling off of Lisbon at the thought of him watching her completely break down.

She'd cried, so what? Her captor had forced her endure a visual marathon of unspeakable horror. Lisbon would have been lacking a soul if she hadn't lost it…If she hadn't fought and scratched and screamed her resistance…If she hadn't pummeled Volker for all she was worth and gotten her teeth rattled for her trouble…If she hadn't dissolved in a hopeless puddle of tears and fear at that girl's suffering.

Jane would freely admit he'd cried as well with far less cause. If he'd thought such confession would make things better. But it wouldn't. He hadn't been the one being mauled and threatened with a similar fate. Merely an interested observer, he couldn't equate his experience with what Lisbon had suffered.

That didn't mean either of them were weak.

They were just so very human unlike Thomas Volker.

"What do you want me to say?" There was more than a tinge of attitude in her tone. "I'm sorry I fell apart?"

"Why would I want that?" Jane asked reasonably. "I know what you saw. Correction, I know more than you saw as I spent the three days you refused to see anyone watching that tape as well as the rest of them. I saw what he did to those women and how glad they were to finally die. None of them would have ever recovered emotionally and they knew it. He'd ruined their lives in every appreciable way. So, My Dear, I'd say you were more than justified in reacting as you did. I certainly don't think any less of you for it. I may have broken down a few times myself."

"There wasn't any reason for you to watch those videos." Jane watched Lisbon blink at him in disbelief. "You'd already seen enough."

She'd hoped to stop him before he'd done something so stupid. She'd hoped to shield him from further unnecessary pain. Jane had been through enough suffering in his life. He'd go through plenty more before Red John was done.

"There was every reason for me to watch those videos. I'm a vital part of the case." Surely Lisbon hadn't forgotten he'd be taking the stand as the only other witness to Volker's crime? The more concrete facts he could state, the better his chances of torpedoing the his defense team. While the D.A.'s office was top notch, it wouldn't do to underestimate the enemy. Volker had slipped through their fingers more than once before. Jane wasn't about to let that happen again. Not now. Not with what he'd done. "For the record, Lisbon, as I know you didn't see the rest of those tapes nor are you likely to, Volker was kind to Emma compared to what he did to the others."

"And to what he intended for me." Lisbon boldly stated a truth neither wanted to hear.

"Yes, I think so." Jane saw no reason to deny the truth as he saw it. "None of those women had done anything to him."

"And I had." Lisbon confirmed. "What do you want me to say? To admit I can't pretend it happened to someone else anymore as much as I've tried? That I know it wasn't you touching me. That I was a delusional fool to image it was? Well, I can't and I do so you don't have to worry about me running from the truth instead of facing it. I don't really have any choice in the matter. Not any longer."

Jane listened to her saying exactly what he was hoping she would say.

It shouldn't be that hard to get her from this point to where he wanted her to be. Or, more truthfully, where she needed to be according to the Therapists he'd been consulting on the sly. Jane shook his head at the thought he was doing so many things behind Lisbon's back she knew nothing about. Things she'd literally wring his neck for if she ever found out. All he could hope was she never did. If that happened, he might never dig himself out of the hole he'd dug himself into.

"It wouldn't bother me at all if you said how much you really want to kill the bastard." Jane admitted honestly. "I'd probably say I'll happily help as long as his death is slow and painful."

Lisbon's eyes widened slightly at his words.

"Shush, Jane." She took another sip of Whiskey.

"Why?" Jane quirked a brow at her. "I didn't say anything we don't both know is true."

If he thought he could get away with walking into Solitary and blowing Volker away, he would. No, not blow him away. That was much too painless. Puncture an artery. Let Volker bleed out slowly before his eyes knowing there was nothing anyone could do to save him. Even should anyone be misguided enough to try. Jane knew he could watch the widening pool of crimson on the floor without the slightest tinge of guilt.

As far as he was concerned, Volker should die with the same compassion with which he'd killed.

Unfortunately, he could do no such thing as Lisbon would be royally put out if he got himself tossed into jail again.

"Fine, have it your way. I really want to kill the bastard. Not just for myself; but, for what he did to Emma and all the rest of those women." Women whose names she didn't even know. "I don't want to talk, Jane. Not like this. It's much too impersonal and surreal feeling."

She might not want to talk; but, she would. He could see that truth in her eyes.

"Would this make it better?" Lying back on the couch, Jane opened his arms.

"Yeah, I think so." Lisbon's tone was garbled as she carefully crawled up his body to nestle against his chest.

Arms lightly encircling Lisbon, Jane brought his left leg up on the couch as he shifted both of them into a more comfortable position trying to jostle her as little as possible. He couldn't help the slight smile as she settled into her favorite spot tucked neatly beneath his chin. He was going to miss these moments when they were gone. This feeling that he was protecting the woman he…cared about.

He'd leave it at that.

"Better?" Jane lightly rubbed his hand over Lisbon's back in tiny circles.

"Better." Lisbon agreed closing her eyes finding comfort in the familiarity of her protector.

"Good." Jane forced himself to be patient as Lisbon gathered her thoughts.

"He held me while we watched that video… and he touched me." Eyes opening suddenly, Jane knew Lisbon was confronting the unpleasant memory. "Inappropriately." He was glad she didn't feel the need to paint a more graphic picture as he was already much too familiar with where Volker liked to put his filthy fingers and what he liked to do with them. "While he explained everything he was doing to that girl and how much he enjoyed doing it. How gratifying he found her terror and pain. It was horrifying…She'd ceased to be a person to him.

She was a thing to torment as he pleased.

But, none of that was true. Emma wasn't a "her," Jane. She was a young woman with a name and a faced and a long life ahead of her. A life she should have gotten to live."

There was too much pain in Lisbon's voice.

"Just like you." Jane quietly reminded her. "You're a young woman with a name and a long life ahead of you. A life, unlike Emma, you're going to get to live."

"Thanks to you." Lisbon said softly as she curled into the arm tightening around her perceptively at her words.

"Mostly thanks to you for staying strong enough to buy us the time we needed." Jane corrected her.

"Whatever." Lisbon dismissed as her eyes clouded over. "Volker had this antique knife with a mother of pearl handle he liked to play with. He'd press it against my neck and tell me how easy it would be to slit my throat if he wanted. Death would be quick and relatively painless if he cut this way or long and painful if he chose to slice just so. Sometimes he'd nick my skin to prove how sharp the blade was.

When he was done, he'd tell me about this table he had down in that room decked out with leather restraints. That was how he immobilized his victims by binding their hands and feet. But you already know that…You've seen the videos.

He loved to tell me what he was going to do with me.

He said he'd start by binding my hands and feet spread eagle so I couldn't hide from him. Then he was going to cut my clothes away with that knife and remove the collar. He'd start with the bra…cut right here." Lisbon motioned to the spot between her breasts. "Then he'd slice my panties on each side. It was all I could not to lose it right there. I think the thought of that monster seeing me naked was worse than the threats he was making.

I couldn't stand the idea of being that vulnerable to his depravity. I know it doesn't make sense; but, it's how I felt. As long as I was somewhat shielded, I could pretend none of this was happening. Once I was naked things would get much too real.

He thought he'd leave me bound naked on that table a day or two before he did anything. Let me get used to the thought of what was to come.

After that, he thought he'd start by choking me with that red silk scarf. The one you saw before He found the way I fought against death highly erotic…The thrashing of my body excited him…."

Shuddering at what she'd left unsaid, Lisbon caught the pained expression in Jane's eyes.

"I keep forgetting you went through it, too." Lisbon said quietly. "Hearing this can be easy for you."

"I didn't go through anything, Teresa. While not an enjoyable experience, all I did was watch you going through what no woman should have to suffer." Jane answered firmly. "I can assure you with confidence that watching Volker and surviving him are not the same." Jane corrected her. "I'm not going to lie to you. My world was suddenly fine when I carried you out that door. None of the rest of it mattered once I had you back. It still doesn't. All I care about is you getting well."

"You really mean that." Lisbon didn't sound like she was fully sold on the idea.

"Yes, I do." Jane said forcefully. "The past doesn't matter. Only the future does."

"I don't think I want to talk about any of this anymore today. Maybe we'll try again tomorrow. Right now I just want to close my eyes and rest. But, I would like to know why it was so important you tell me you'd seen those videos. They don't have anything to do with me." They had a lot to do with her case as he'd said; but, nothing directly to do with her.

"Because I wanted you to know there's no reason you need to censor what you say to me or wonder what I've seen or haven't seen. Suffice it to say, I've seen it all. Everything he did to you and most of what he did to _them_. If it was committed to video, I've seen it. There's nothing you can shield me from as there's nothing I can shield you from. Except maybe the foolish curiosity of our co-workers which I assure you I will do when the time comes." Jane reassured her.

"Whatever." This was exactly what she'd been hoping to avoid on her first evening home. "I really don't feel like talking about this anymore." Lisbon said again.

"Then we won't. Not tonight; but, you need to stop shoving your emotions into that neat little cop box. Stop telling yourself you shouldn't be as affected as any other woman because you knew what to expect. You've had the classes and you've read the books." Jane said. "In other words, stop being a fool. Cry when you want to. Scream when you want to. Throw things if it'll make you feel better. I won't think any less of you as I've certainly done all of those things and more." Jane ignored the warning look in her eyes.

"Shush, Jane." Her tone said she'd had enough.

"Lisbon, you need to know I'm here when you're ready. Whether you want to talk or sneak off to the CBI to beat the hell out of a punching bag or go to a firing range two towns over on the down low, I don't really care. Just let me know and I'll get your weapons. The bottom line is you're not alone." Jane reminded her.

"I know that." Lisbon stared at the ceiling refusing to look at him.

"I'm not sure you do or if you do that you won't still try going it alone." Jane observed quietly. "As much as you might be more comfortable handling all of this on your own, it won't work and you know it. You might as well give up now and let me in. You're just going to end up doing that before it's over anyway."

"Shush, Jane." Lisbon closed her eyes.

"I don't think I will." Jane watched her eyes flicker open resignedly at his words. "You're pulling a typical Lisbon. You were scared witless when Volker started messing with you; but, I didn't interfere. I let you play it your way and only interceded when you wanted me too. I don't think I'm going to play it that way this time.

I'm not going to force you into being more graphic than you want before you're ready; but, I'm going to pick at the scabs when I see you plaster one of those stupid "I'm okay" smiles on your face meaning you're anything but." Jane told her.

"You can do all of that later." Lisbon said wearily. "At the moment, I'd really like another drink and one of those cookies instead."

"Only you would drink with cookies." Jane couldn't stop the moue of distaste at the thought those two flavors really didn't go together.

"Then bring me a glass of milk." Lisbon said. "We can have that last drink after we finish dessert. Oh, and don't try to tell me there's nothing left. You've have tossed the bottle in the trash can instead of putting it back in the cabinet if it was empty. I might be out of commission at the moment, but I'm still a damned good cop."

"Yes, you are." Jane said as he lifted Lisbon and settled her at the opposite end of the couch before rising to his feet.

He should have known she'd figure out there was more alcohol in the house and that she'd want more than one drink. Lisbon wasn't above taking the edge off though she never let it go too far. Not with her family history.

Walking into the kitchen he poured two glasses of milk before placing four cookies on a plate and heading back for the den. All in all, he couldn't call the evening a bust. He'd gotten more out of Lisbon than he'd expected and he hadn't had to push all that hard. She'd gotten more out of him than he'd counted on as well.

Walking back into the den, Jane sat the cookies in front of Lisbon before offering her a glass of milk. Taking his seat beside her, he wasn't surprised when she placed her legs across his lap and held out the plate now bearing three cookies. Smirking at the messy chocolate smears around her mouth, Jane took a peanut butter chocolate kiss cookie from the plate resisting the urge to lick the sweetness away. He'd get brained for his efforts.

Lisbon would think he was making for another cookie instead of trying to steal a few kisses. As she was already hovering protectively around that plate, he didn't think his first inclination was a bright idea. The woman really wasn't good on the concept of sharing. Not when it came to cookies, homemade Ravioli, and Red Delicious apples.

#####

Staring at his reflection in Lisbon's closet mirror, Jane refused to dwell on how strange it still felt to be getting dressed in her room instead of the guest room down the hall. Well, he wasn't exactly getting dressed getting dressed. He'd done that in her bathroom. He was actually only straightening his jacket and vest and combing his hair.

I'll be home as soon as I can." Jane turned from the mirror and walked over to stand by the bed.

Leaning over to brush his lips against hers, Jane watched Lisbon slip back under the covers with a strangely determined look. As tempting as it was, he refused to ask what kind of crazy thoughts were going through her head. Not so much because he didn't want to know.

He did.

More because there was nothing he could do about them.

Though there were many things he could help her through, in the end, Lisbon had to find her own way. And he had to let her. He'd figured that out that first night he'd brought her home when he'd pushed too hard. She had nightmares that night. The kind that had him slipping into bed behind her and engulfing her protectively in the security of his strong body. He'd slipped into bed with her every night in the month since to keep the dreams at bay. It was his fault she begun having them anyway. Not that he minded any more than Lisbon did. He enjoyed holding her. He always had. Her petite framed curled into him perfectly which was something he'd never been able to ignore.

Not even when he'd been determined to end up in a jail cell or six feet under.

"I know you will." Lisbon easily agreed.

"Are you going to be okay?" Jane asked with defiant concern in his voice.

"I'll be fine." Lisbon said the words he expected to hear.

"I won't be gone that long." Jane promised meaning it.

"You'll be gone as long as Bertram says you'll be gone and we both know it." Lisbon reminded him. "The real question is will you be okay?"

He didn't want to leave her and she didn't want him to go.

Jane had fought valiantly to get out of going to the office when the call came in. Obviously, he hadn't won the battle as the caller had been Bertram himself. In spite of having skillfully argued his side and littering his response with several outright refusals to come in, the Big Boss had won the day. It seemed the case was too high profile to have anything less than the CBI's most distinguished. As much as he hated to admit it, that meant Jane and the rest of Lisbon's team.

That their leader was still out on medical leave was a serious blow to the Bureau. Because they were already one of their heaviest hitters down, Bertram couldn't afford to excuse their not so secret weapon too. Not after a month of leaving them alone. This case couldn't be entrusted to any other team. Fortunately, Cho was a capable TL and he knew Jane would be on his best behavior.

Lisbon wouldn't accept anything less.

"Why would you think I wouldn't be?" Jane reluctantly asked knowing exactly what she meant.

"The victim's a young girl who'd be about Charlotte Anne's age." Lisbon said quietly. "I know you, Jane. You're going to be anything but okay with this case…Then you have to come home to deal with this."

Lisbon made a gesture indicating "this" was her.

"Damn it, Lisbon, you aren't a "this" and I want to be here." Jane corrected her as he sat on the edge of the bed. "I wouldn't be leaving you if I had a choice.

As for any dealing with "this" as you put it, I'm not the one who's dealing with anything. You are and you'll be doing it alone without my help. How do you think that makes me feel? For the record, it isn't something I like or the way I think it should be. It isn't the agreement I struck with the higher ups."

Jane was beyond mad about the whole situation.

"Shush, Jane. They've given us a month longer than I expected." Lisbon calmed him with the feel of her hand over his. "Bertram wouldn't be calling you now if it wasn't necessary. He'd be letting you consult from home as he has been. Unfortunately, we've got a Sacramento Councilwoman's teen aged daughter killed in her bed with all the windows and doors locked. That sounds like a Jane case to me so he doesn't have a whole lot of choice."

"Yeah, well, it's not as complicated as it seems." Jane said. "I've looked at the photographs of that nineteenth century mausoleum they call a house and I'm sure we'll find a secret passage or two built in the walls. Since Cho's already sent what they have over to your computer, I'm familiar with the case. I called Van Pelt to track down the original blue prints while I was downstairs making coffee. I seriously doubt it'll take very long to wrap the case up."

"Wow." Lisbon looked into his eyes. "It sounds like you're ready to get back to work."

"I'm ready to get the day over so I can come back to you and I haven't even left." Jane amended her assumption.

"I'll be okay." Lisbon reassured him.

"Like you've been okay the past month?" Jane silently reminded her there was a reason he was getting dressed in her bathroom.

"Shush, Jane." Lisbon leaned her forehead against his before leaning back to look in his eyes. "I've got to start somewhere and you need a break from being cooped up in here with me."

"I haven't been cooped up." And he hadn't been. "Let's see, I've gone to the grocery store, stopped by the CBI a number of times, gone to the Farmer's Market, and the Library to get those books you wanted. Oh, and I went out to buy those videos on your Wish List."

"Yeah, and you were gone an hour tops, maybe two, for all of those things." Lisbon reminded him. "Even I can manage an hour or two without a babysitter."

There was a slightly bitter tone to her voice he didn't like. She

"Teresa, stop it. I'm where I want to be." Jane cast his eyes over to glance at Lisbon's alarm clock suddenly realizing it was much later than he'd thought. "And as much as it pains me to say it, I've got to go. I have a pow-wow with Bertram and Cho in half an hour. There are leftovers in the fridge for lunch and I'm only a phone call away. I'll drop everything if you need me. I mean it."

"I know you do." Lisbon promised knowing she wasn't calling Jane if it killed her.

He had a job to do.

And he'd be home when he got home.

She'd just have to accept that was how it was and how it had to be.

"I'll be home as soon as I can." And much quicker than Bertram expected or his name wasn't Patrick Jane.

"I'll be here." Lisbon closed her eyes enjoying the slight brush of his lips against hers before she watched him walk out the door.

Catching a last glimpse of Lisbon sliding under the covers yet again, Jane found nothing comforting in the way she settled into her pillows. He had a feeling going back to sleep was the last thing on that woman's mind. She'd had a certain determined gleam in her eye he didn't like. One saying she was up to something or his name was Patrick Jane. As they both knew it was…It was really too bad he didn't have time to probe her mind. Figure out what she was up to and how much trouble she was likely to get into doing it.

For now, he was powerless to do anything more than what he was doing. Lock the door behind him and walking to his car. He had less than a half hour to get to Bertram's office and the man didn't like being kept waiting. While he'd gladly yank his chain by doing just that on another day, Jane had no intentions of riling the man any time soon. The less trouble he was, the more likely it would be he could sneak away when Bertram wasn't looking.

Pulling out of the driveway onto the freeway, Jane hoped whatever Lisbon planned on getting into later as something he could easily resolve once he returned.

Somehow he seriously doubted it would be that simple.

There was just something about Lisbon's demeanor that said his life was about to go to hell in a hand basket.

He hoped it had nothing to do with those encrypted videos on the computer in Lisbon's office. While Van Pelt had done her best to keep Lisbon out, Jane had no doubts the woman could break the codes if she really wanted to. She was quite good at that kind of thing and knew almost as much about that business as Van Pelt did. That wasn't in their favor.

He could only hope he was barking up the wrong tree and there was nothing she wanted to see bad enough to go through the necessary effort to access the videos.

If she did, he'd have a mess to clean up before the day was over. Putting that thought on the back burner, Jane shifted his focus to the case. The quicker he figured out who killed a precocious teen-ager, the quicker he'd be back where he belonged by Lisbon's side. Getting background info on the teachers at the victim's exclusive private school who were also close friends of the family sounded like as good a place to start as any.

Lifting his cell to his ear, Jane pressed Van Pelt's number listening for the familiar ring praying the whole while it didn't go straight to voice mail.


	13. Chapter 12

A/N: Thank you for sticking with this story and thank you for the reviews. This chapter is short; but, the last one is longer and already written so we're on the verge of wrapping this story up!~Calla

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Face glued to the monitor screen, Lisbon replayed that final video for the thousandth time with tears streaming down her face. It was one of several that should never have been downloaded on her home office computer but were. Downloaded and wickedly protected as well. It seemed Jane had gotten "For His Eyes Only" clearance from very high places to work at home and these videos were his assignment. An assignment he'd taken seriously as Lisbon knew. When he wasn't with her, he was mired in the darkness playing out on that computer screen.

Unfortunately for everyone involved, it had only taken her an hour to penetrate some of Van Pelt's best work. The woman was good. She just happened to be better. Not at the actual programming part of it. No way. Grace was their resident computer specialist. She definitely was not. That being said, Van Pelt had more than met her match in her Boss in other ways.

was the best detective among them and the keenest observer. Next to Jane of course. But, he wasn't a CBI agent so he didn't count in this equation. It was too bad her watchdog hadn't realized she'd learned all of her Agent's tricks years ago. All she'd had to do was implement them in the right order and she'd gotten access to where she wanted to be. Namely viewing those video tapes.

It had taken her another four of hours hell to wade through the State's Exhibits.

She'd accomplished a surprising lot in a relatively short period of time. It was only a little after one and her body hurt like hell for her trouble. Lisbon honestly didn't know why Jane still tortured himself watching those bloody things as she knew he did. During the day and late at night when he thought she was sleeping. He'd gotten more than enough to aid the Prosecution the first few times he'd watched them. He didn't need to still be doing it.

However, she was sure he had his reasons for continuing the torture.

More than the D.A. asked him to.

Reasons like he wasn't taking any chances Volker could slip through their fingers again. The more he details he noticed, the more chance that would never happen. As much as she hated Jane's newest obsession, Lisbon couldn't fault him for it.

Too bad Jane hadn't had these tapes before she'd been taken. That pretty boy psychopath never would have gotten out on bail if he had. He'd never had gotten the opportunity to put his nefarious plans in motions. He'd certainly never have taken her and she'd never have gone through the hell still replaying on that never ceasing loop in her head.

Last, but not least, she'd never have felt compelled to watch those _other_ tapes.

If she hadn't done that, she wouldn't have spent the past few hours yelling and screaming and wreaking general havoc on the room around her. From the looks of things, she'd done a damned good job if she said so herself…Starting with that small, colored glass globe striking the wall leaving a small crater behind.

That one had been at and for Jane.

He should have done more that night to see their perfect evening wasn't spoiled. More than simply warning her to watch her back! He should have insisted she go straight home! Better yet, he should have followed her and kept her safe!

Lisbon admitted she'd have verbally gutted him for his trouble. But still...

As irrational as the thought, there was no denying the feelings silently festering in her soul.

It didn't matter she knew what happened to her wasn't Jane's fault may more than it was hers. That while he might have stopped the freak from getting her that night, Volker would have persevered in the hunt until she'd eventually fallen into his sadistic clutches. She knew all of this with her rational mind. Her emotions were a different matter. Jane had promised to always have her back. To keep her safe no matter what. He'd done a pretty good job at tremendous cost over the years until this time. That was what she was finding unforgivable. He'd failed miserably and a part of her couldn't let him off the hook yet. Though she'd never admit such a thing, Lisbon knew a dark part of her she despised blamed Jane for her downfall. She knew as well that all of that poison must come out. Jane was too important to her to lose him over something that wasn't his fault.

It seemed she'd done a fairly good job of purging that demon from the sizable dent in her wall and the jagged crying session that followed.

After that, everything grew hazy…She'd lost herself in shades of Dr. Carmen all over again…The only difference was this time she wasn't putting on a show.

What she did know was swiping that first shelf of books on the floor was truly liberating. After that, she didn't remember a thing beyond the jumbled emotions pouring from the depths of her soul. The disgust and anger she'd felt at the local P.D.'s for never connecting the dots that weren't so hard to see had they only broadened their search in the first place. The hated she'd felt towards Volker for what he'd done to those wretched woman. The horror and revulsion she'd felt seeing the things he'd so graphically described to her actually perpetrated on his victims and knowing he'd meant the worst of them as her coup de grâce. She'd wanted to kill him with her bare hands before attacking her office instead.

Looking at the destruction surrounding her, Lisbon considered herself lucky the cops weren't beating down her door. She'd fallen into quite a frenzy for a good while from looks of things. She'd destroyed every picture frame and knickknack in the room. She'd decimated the posters on the wall. There wasn't a book in the room left on the shelf or faux plant still in its pot. Fortunately there wasn't a window in here or her chair would probably gone through it. No, more likely one of the small tables she was fully capable of lifting. The ones she'd flipped anyway.

Fortunatley, her desk, heavy leather chair, and computer remained unscathed. She'd had enough sanity left not destroy the things she needed most.

Shaking her head, Lisbon was really surprised no one had responded to the noise. Her neighbors had to have heard the devastation she was creating. They had to have heard and chosen to ignore the sounds coming from her apartment. She couldn't fathom that. While a sad commentary on the state of the world, perhaps it was understandable that no one intervened. Especially considering a madman was involved and everyone knew it. Maybe they justified their lack intersession by reasoning she was a cop so she could handle it.

Or, perhaps, she wasn't as loud as she thought.

As all of her immediate neighbors were at work, they may not have heard a sound. She liked that idea much better than the first though she wasn't naïve enough to believe it was true. Reality was probably far less palatable. Old Lady Harrison was deaf as a doorknob and, like nearly everyone else in the world; her surrounding neighbors just didn't want to get involved. That was the most likely scenario and Lisbon knew it.

Swiping at her fevered cheeks, she reached for the phone.

As irrationally angry as she still was with Jane, her desire to not be alone overrode any imaginary quarrels she had with her Mentalist. To heck with any vows she'd made she wasn't calling him come hell or high water. She needed his calming presence. She needed his insane brand of sanity to anchor her through the storm.

Staring at the phone in her hand, Lisbon mused absently over the fact that Jane's was the only number programmed into speed dial on her home telephone line that wasn't a family member. That was telling in so many ways she refused to think about any time soon. For one, it underscored how pathetic her social life really was. For another, it defined the importance Jane held in her personal life. Her old college roommate she still talked to once or twice a month wasn't even on her speed dial while her Mentalist was.

Whatever.

So much for not contemplating what she was clearly contemplating and not liking the results. The truth was far too simple. Patrick Jane had been pretty darned near the center of her Universe for too may years. Not always for the best or healthiest of reasons. Take those six months he'd spent in Vegas doing Lorelei and God only knew what else. She'd had a lot of deep, dark thoughts not worth remembering anymore back then. Thoughts even her team had noticed.

Shaking her head free of unbidden thoughts, Lisbon hit the button and waited for the familiar voice on the line.

#####

Reaching into his pocket, Jane removed the vibrating cell as he held up his hand to Cho halting whatever the other man was about to say. They had a mutual agreement if that phone rang, he was checking it. If it was Lisbon, he was answering no matter who they were interviewing or what was going down. He would not make her wait for anything.

Besides, they both knew she wouldn't disturb him unless it was something of the utmost important.

"Lisbon?" Jane answered his phone. "Need me to pick up another bottle of grape juice?" He joked.

She'd gone through the one at the house pretty fast.

Jane's eyes flickered uneasily towards Cho as he waited for her next words. From the look on his face, he clearly wasn't pleased by whatever the Boss was saying.

"I'll be right there." Jane dropped his phone back in his pocket and headed for the door. "I doubt I'll be back today, Cho."

"Jane." Cho wasn't sure the other man was going to stop at the sound of his voice.

He was much too intent on getting to Lisbon and clearly unwilling to tolerate anything that might stand in his way.

"Yes?" Jane turned in the doorway.

"What did she say?" Cho asked.

"Come home." Jane said not at all surprised at Cho's answering nod at the simple, evocative words. "I'll give you a call when I can."

"You do that." Cho said.

"Don't expect that call any time soon." Jane said unnecessarily. "I have to get Lisbon settled first."

No words were necessary as Jane headed for the elevator eventually making his way out of the building to his car. Sliding into the seat, he ran his hand through his hair and gathered his thought. Fastening his seatbelt he turned the key in the ignition and pulled from his parking place. Fifteen minutes later, Jane wasn't sure how he'd gotten out of the parking lot and half way to Lisbon's place without realizing it. He'd been too intent on wondering what he would find when he got home he supposed.

Truthfully, Lisbon hadn't sounded afraid or out-of-control…far from it. Her tone had been more shaken than anything. A shaken Lisbon didn't bode well for what she'd been up to.

Fear he could handle. He'd been dealing with that for a while now. Out-of-control wasn't totally unexpected. He'd dealt with that a time or two as well. Anger, reasonable or not, was par for the course.

Shaken, now shaken, was a totally different matter.

Lisbon was strong, steady, and calm by nature. She didn't shake easily. When she did, it was big.

What kind of big, he didn't know and he didn't think he was going to like it when he did.

However, he'd bet it had something to do with those videos she'd promised not to watch. The ones he was studying for the D.A.'s office. For whatever reason, they seemed to think he might see something their experts missed.

They also seemed to believe that his input was valuable enough to ask him to put himself through a hell he'd rather not endure. And risk putting Lisbon through a hell she didn't deserve. In the end, he'd come to believe he had no choice. Volker had to be stopped for good. For everyone's sake.

No matter the personal cost.

Pulling into his parking space and locking his door, Jane snorted at the thought the DA actually wanted a Jane twist for a change. It seemed there truly was a first time for everything.

Making his way to Lisbon's apartment, Jane unlocked the door. Taking a deep breath he stepped inside comforted that everything was neat as a pin as far as the eye could see. The kitchen, dining room, and den were fine. While comforting under other circumstances, Jane found that reality far from pleasant under these. Walking down the hall towards where he suspected Lisbon was, he stopped in the doorway taking in the mess.

"Feeling better, My Dear?" He didn't know what else to say.

Lisbon sat in the middle of the wreck that had been her Spartan, but homey office, just a few short hours ago. Every framed poster was off the walls and broken. Every CD, DVD, and book had been swiped from the shelves. A few pieces of the smaller furnishings were over turned and the room was a general disaster. Had she been able, Jane was sure a few of the larger pieces of furniture like her desk would have been flipped as well.

She wasn't and they weren't.

Fortunately, she'd had enough sense not to trash the computer which should have been the first thing to go.

"I think so." Lisbon admitted.

"Good, then let me get you out of there." Walking through the broken wood and glass, Jane pulled Lisbon to her feet and scooped her in his arms.

"I can walk." Lisbon protested as Jane carried her upstairs and laid her on her bed before walking into her bathroom to return a few minutes later with a damp wash cloth.

"It's more fun carrying you." Jane held out the wash cloth. "Wipe your face. You'll feel better. I'll be back in a minute."

Walking down stairs, Jane poured a generous glass of grape juice from the now mostly empty bottle and carried it back upstairs.

"I don't know what happened." Lisbon said quietly as he reappeared in the door with his peace offering. "I got so mad and I was thinking thoughts that have nothing to do with how I really feel."

"What kind of thoughts and who were you angry with?" Jane asked.

"I don't know. Volker, myself, maybe…" Lisbon hesitated.

"Who else?" Jane asked not really wanting to hear what she needed to share.

"You." Lisbon whispered.

"Why?" Now they were getting somewhere.

"Because you should have made me go straight home that night." Lisbon admitted. "Reminded me that one more day of drive-thru wouldn't hurt anything."

"You do know I couldn't and I can't make you do anything right?" Jane saids settling in his usual place behind her.

"I know." Lisbon agreed. "And I know my feelings are unreasonable. You didn't do anything wrong. I made the decision to stop by the store that night like I've done a hundred times before. If it hadn't been for Volker, nothing bad would have happened."

"But a part of you needs someone other than Volker and yourself to blame." Jane said what she wouldn't. "Don't you think I blame myself for letting him take you? I was concerned enough about Volker to warn you to be careful that night. It wouldn't have taken more than a little extra time to take it a step farther. To follow you to the store then see you home safely. We both made a bad call that night, Teresa, and I'm sorry." Jane breathed against her hair. "If we hadn't, none of this would have happened.

"It's not your fault." Lisbon snuggled a little tighter against his chest.

"No, it's not, and it's not yours. The blame lies entirely with Volker. If he hadn't gotten you that night, he would have some other time. I'm sure of that." Jane rubbed her back gently pleased that the pill had begun to take effect. "However, your anger towards me is perfectly natural. It means you're beginning to heal as you should be. Close your eyes, Teresa. You need the rest."

"I am feeling tired." Lisbon agreed. "Making a mess takes a lot out of you."

"Yes, it does." Jane grimaced at the thought cleaning up that mess was going to take a lot out him.

Hearing Lisbon's breathing even out, Jane reached for the file beside him. While he'd like to take a nap himself, he was much too keyed up. He might as well get some work done while he watched over Lisbon. With a little luck, he'd have the case solved by the time she woke up.

######

"Hey." Jane said a good while later as Lisbon lifted her face off his chest.

"Hey, yourself." Lisbon said. "Sorry for getting you all wet."

"I'm dry now." Jane said brushing the hair off her face.

"Yeah, I guess you are." Lisbon said. "Sorry I feel asleep."

"Stop apologizing." Jane ran his hand lightly over her back. "You were drained."

"How long was I out?" Lisbon asked.

"Pushing four hours." Jane dropped the file in his hand on the mattress…the one he'd been contemplating while she was happily drooling on his chest. "Maybe a little longer."

"That long?" Lisbon felt heat staining her cheeks.

"You were fried." Jane reassured her.

"I guess I was." Lisbon agreed as she still felt fried. "I still shouldn't have slept that long."

"I might have dissolved one of those sedatives you don't like to take in your juice." Jane quietly admitted. "The ones that knock you for a loop."

"You are so dead." Lisbon smacked him on the chest a tad harder than she meant to. "No one medicates me without my permission, even you. Got it?"

She'd thought that juice had a funky aftertaste; but, hadn't thought much about it since she'd already up ended the glass. All that yelling and crying had made her really thirsty. That and she hadn't expected Jane to pull any funny stuff. He'd been on his best behavior the last few weeks. Except when he tried to coerce her into talking when she didn't want to. She could handle that. She gave in sometimes and stood firm on others. It all depended on her mood.

"Yeah, I got it." Jane's tone was anything but repentant even though that smack had stung.

"I'll let it slide this time." Lisbon decided. "I was still pretty upset when you got here."

"You do know I did everything I could to get you out of there?" Jane asked quietly. "We all did everything we could."

"I know and I'm sorry for some of the things I said. I don't blame you and I know you did everything in you power to find me." Lisbon admitted. "I know I would never have been found without you."

"Yes, I did and you wouldn't have been; but, you have every right to be angry if that's how you feel." Jane dropped a kiss on her lips. "Just not with yourself and not with me. Mad at Volker, the situation, and what was done to you, yes, and we'll deal with it. Just not with the people who care about you, got it?"

"Yeah, I got it." Lisbon agreed knowing he was right.

"I'll get you into the gym and hold the punching bag for you if that's what you want next week. We'll go late at night when it's mostly empty. Your ribs should be healed enough by then. It they aren't, maybe we can go to the track or the shooting range. We'll do whatever you need to not have a repeat performance of what the team just cleaned up down there."

"The guys were here?" Lisbon looked at him in disbelief.

"They showed up about a half hour after you fell asleep to make sure you were okay. I let them in and reassured them you were resting comfortably. Then we cleaned up the mess and they left. I came back up here with the case file to work and watch you sleep. End of story." Jane said very matter-of-factly as though having Lisbon trash her office was an everyday occurrence.

"I can't believe you let them in here." She couldn't believe he'd exposed her vulnerabilities to Rigsby, Van Pelt, and Cho.

"Why wouldn't I?" Jane asked. "We were hoping for something like this at some point, Teresa. It's time. It's a far healthier response than putting on your big girl panties and bottling everything up. To telling me just so much and stopping when you get to the parts you don't want to verbalize.

I can assure you I wouldn't have tried to stop you if I'd been home."

"You'd have let me trash my home?" The man was an idiot.

"I would let you trash mine." Jane said.

"That's easy to say since you don't have a home." While Jane still owned a house; it was tragically no longer a home.

"You hardly trashed anything, Lisbon. You broke a few picture frames, overturned a table or two, and tossed the room. It was hardly trashing anything." Jane said ignoring her earlier remark as it wasn't entirely true.

He was finding since her return, that anywhere Lisbon was felt like home.

"I probably would have done a lot more damage if what I did hadn't hurt so badly." Lisbon admitted.

"Yeah, well, you're hardly one hundred percent which is probably good." Jane flicked a strand of hair off her cheek. "I could have come home to a repeat of the whole Dr. Carmine thing to find a chair through the window or worse if you were."

"You might have." Lisbon agreed. "Jane, the neighbors…."

"Don't worry about the neighbors. Most of them were at work and I took care of the rest." Jane said quietly. "Nobody is giving any of this a second thought."

And they weren't. Or if they were, they were too busy being grateful the nightmare happened to Lisbon and not one of them to care about a little noise. Though no one would ever say such a thing, he'd read it in their eyes.

"You sure?" Lisbon asked. "No one called the cops?"

"You are the cops, My Dear, and no one called SAC PD." Jane reassured her.

"Good." Lisbon said. "I'd have hated to explain the mess."

"You didn't have to." Changing the subject for both their sakes, Jane motioned to the abandoned file at his side. "Want to help me solve this case?"

While Lisbon seemed better, he was still a little too raw to continue reliving her "moment" right now. And while she hadn't meant what she said, some of her angry comments had hit a little too close to home. He'd been uncomfortable enough with the possibility of Volker getting out on bail that he'd warned her to be careful. He should have done more. If he was that bothered by the idea, he should have gone to the grocery store with her and seen her home after. And maybe he hadn't done enough to set her free once he'd realized Volker had her. Maybe if he'd been less traumatized by the things Volker was doing to his girl, he might have put the pieces together sooner or seen something he never knew he'd missed. Deciding he wasn't going there and the moment for recriminations had long passed, Jane forced his mind back on the case.

"You got any good ideas?" Lisbon's voice penetrated his thoughts.

"I know how it was done and I suspect the "who" doing it." Jane confirmed. "However, I don't have the necessary proof yet."

"If you'll help me up, then, yes, I think I would." Lisbon winced as Jane helped her flip over to lay with her back against his chest. "Why don't you share your theories while I look over the file."

"I was right that there is a secret passage way running from the basement to the bedrooms. The blue prints Van Pelt found confirmed it. So, that's how our killer got to Sarah's bedroom and back out again without anyone knowing.

I have little doubts Sarah shared the means of her murder with her killer even knowing she shouldn't. Those passageways were a well kept family secret for a reason. Great-great- grandpa had been a little on the paranoid side; but, he had come across the country from the East coast in the Wild West days. He'd wanted his family to have a secret escape route in case of an unexpected attack. From who or what, I don't really know. Though certainly unnecessary now, succeeding generations had honored his wish they keep his secret which is why Sarah's parents never told us about the passageways.

Their daughter obviously didn't find some hundred and fifty year old promise all that binding and it cost her life. Her killer came into her bedroom, snapped her neck unexpectedly, and left her lovingly tucked into her bed which suggests he knew Sarah intimately." Jane said watching Lisbon skim over the file as he'd watched her do hundreds of times before.

"Why "he"?" Lisbon asked knowing there was more to the case than Jane was telling.

"Because, as I've already said; _he_ knew the victim intimately." When would the woman just take him at his word? "Sarah was ten or twelve weeks pregnant."

"Damn." Lisbon whistled under her breath. "I bet Bertram loved that little twist. A pregnant under-aged debutant getting murdered makes for the kind of negative press he doesn't like. Especially if it turns out she was killed by her lover who just happens to be old enough to know better. "

Particularly not after the crap storm her kidnapping and rescue had generated.

"He's definitely old enough to know better." Jane said behind her.

"You already know who did it?" Lisbon asked.

"An old family friend also known as Sarah's Biology teacher at that expensive private school she attended. And one who stood to lose one of the larger fortunes in the Sacramento area and not just his teaching position when his affair became public knowledge and his wife divorced him for committing statutory rape with her best friend's daughter."

"You've got to be kidding me. Crap. Bertram's really going to love this one." Lisbon mused.

"I suppose he is." Jane agreed.

"We better get to work proving your case." Lisbon leaned back against Jane's chest. "If we don't, Bertram's going to figure you can't do your job without me around. When he decides that, he's going to start demanding I go in to visit the CBI shrink more frequently. Or he's going to send her back over here. Not a good thing considering how I feel mixing work with my personal space."

"You're going to have to start seeing your doctor more than once a week soon anyway." Jane reminded her.

"Not for a couple of weeks." Lisbon said stubbornly as she really didn't like shrinks.

More importantly, she disliked _that _particular shrink more than usual.

And she hated that Olson reported directly back to Bertram.

Out and out despised that none of her secrets were sacred or safe. Not that she had shared many of them. But the ones that slipped out…they'd gone straight to the Big Boss's ear.

Lisbon refused to dwell on the visits she couldn't stop; but, she didn't have to accept the ones she could.

The Olson witch was a necessary evil if she wanted to get back to work and she did…More than anything. ..Maybe not more than she wanted to see Volker burn in hell…But, a fairly close second she was sure.

"Lisbon, you've got to stop fighting the sessions." Jane said quietly. "Can the lone wolf, tough chick act. Give them what they want. Not your deepest, darkest secrets. Those are only for us and I know that. But give them something that feels different. You're good at that. Regurgitating things they've already heard a thousand times wrapped in seemingly different words."

"Like what?"

"That you were touched in ways you didn't like. That you watched Emma die on video. That you have distressing nightmares that aren't going away as fast as you'd hoped they would. The list goes on. Just tell her how you feel about all of that." Seeing the distraught look on her face, Jane quickly amended his words. "Not _those _touches, Lisbon. Those are for us to work through; but, the others they already suspect. Tell her how you felt about being choked over and over again. How you felt getting shocked and burned by that infernal collar. How hopeless you were locked in room with no means escape. You won't be telling Olson or Bertram anything they don't already know; but, you'll make both of them fell you're making progress in sharing your ordeal.

No-one ever has to know what we know and I'm not asking you to tell. That's between you and me. Where it belongs and where it'll stay as we've already agreed. As for the rest of it, do you think you can do what I've asked? Throw the dogs a few bones and keep them off our backs." Jane asked quietly.

"I don't want to; but, I think I can." Lisbon agreed. "Especially if it'll get me a few steps closer to returning to work."

"Good girl." Jane gave her a hug. "As much as I'm against the establishment, this time we need to play along. It'll work out more in our favor in the end."

"I think you're right." Lisbon reluctantly agreed hating the words leaving her mouth.

Unfortunately, if there was one thing she'd learned over the years: when Jane was right he was right.

In this case, he was definitely right.

She had no choice but playing nice with a woman she utterly despised.


	14. Chapter 13

Surveying the bullpen from where he was lounging on his couch, Jane watched Lisbon moving easily about the room. She was discussing their current case with her Agents like old times as she moved about the space with confidence and ease. He had to admit, she looked good. Really good considering what he knew the others didn't. Like the nightmare never happened.

Lisbon acted like it, too, if you didn't know her all that well. There were distinct, yet subtle, differences if you did.

Studying Lisbon from every angle, Jane was pleased with what he was seeing. The woman had finally regained most of the weight she'd lost when the crap hit the fan soon after her release from the hospital. Those appealing curves were returning to all the right places. Petite from the git-go, she didn't wear delicate well and a too skinny Lisbon couldn't appear any other way. He'd found her appearance much too unsettling and a constant reminder of what she'd been through. Besides, delicate and vulnerable weren't two words he liked associating with his "Boss" or best friend and potential lover for that matter. Not in that context. They didn't suit the feisty woman he knew her to be.

Watching Lisbon move behind Van Pelt to study her computer screen, Jane concluded _maybe_ when she'd been wearing that pink bride's maid's dress those words were acceptable. She'd looked delicate and vulnerable in ways she'd not been comfortable feeling. Ways he'd found deliciously appealing. Whether she knew it or not, the woman cleaned up nicely. Better than nice. There was just something about that day…About stumbling upon Lisbon so unexpectedly in such a raw, unguarded moment…She'd literally taken his breath away for a few moments.

He'd wanted to say so much more than he had.

Truthfully, he'd wanted to kiss her and not in a brotherly way.

Too bad all of that had gone awry so tragically. They both deserved better. And while he couldn't make that happen for Gracie, the dark haired woman smiling reassuringly at her Agent was a different matter.

Jane had to admit that in the six months since she'd returned to the CBI, not counting the three months of mandatory medical leave awaiting her psychological clearance, Lisbon had come a long way. Long enough the nasty rumors had started again. The ones saying they were banging like bunnies having resumed that torrid affair they'd started years ago.

To Lisbon's credit, she ignored them as she always did.

Him, not so much as he'd felt an overwhelming need to address the instigators in a more proactive manner. Not that such dressing down had help all that much. It just made the nastiness more prevalent in dark corners than around the water cooler which was fine by Jane. It meant Lisbon was less likely to hear the viperous, slithering bastards or their random raunchiness. While the undeniable closeness they'd developed over the years was adding fuel the flames, Jane couldn't believe the malicious stupidity of some people.

How could anyone think anything so ridiculous after everything Lisbon had been through?

They hadn't been lovers before Volker took her and they certainly hadn't become lovers since.

Not that they wouldn't have if Lisbon were ready. Or they weren't slowly inching in that direction. But, he was a far cry from in her bed in that respect.

When it came to Lisbon, he had nothing to hide. Well, maybe he did; but, not when it came to what he gossipmongers were spewing about. Had anyone bothered to ask, he would have gladly told them the truth.

That in the three months he'd stayed at her place, he had _held_ her, _kissed_ her, and _touched_ her with promise; but, without intent, never truly crossing that line into dark, forbidden territories.

He could have had he wanted.

And, as his lover in all but fact, Lisbon would have let him. She wanted him to do just that. Jane was sure of it. As sure as he was he wouldn't do such a thing…Never urge her towards something she clearly wasn't ready for.

Nor was he.

When that step was finally taken, Lisbon would know it was him loving her and she'd reciprocate.

She wouldn't mistake him for any other man.

In the six months she'd been living alone, he'd spent a few nights here and there in her guest room when the aloneness became too much for her bear. Those nights had grown fewer and farther between with the passage of time. In fact, he hadn't gotten a late night summons in more than six weeks which was a good thing. Lisbon had clearly made great strides in healing recently.

Jane wasn't sure how he felt about that.

On the one hand, healing was good. It meant they could snail towards that talk they'd put on hold that first night at _Trevor's. _Maybe entertain thoughts of urging their relationship in a different direction. How could he find fault with that?

On the other, he already missed the closeness of the last few months.

He missed those talks gradually morphing from distressing and heated to quiet acceptance and mutual understanding. He missed the companionable work out sessions on some days and beating the hell out of the punching bag sessions on others. He missed their trips to the firing range that usually followed her most recent visit to Dr. Olson's office. If Lisbon was beating the hell out of an imaginary Volker at the gym, she was murdering the CBI shrink in cold blood at the firing range. Jane laughed at the thought his woman was so predictable.

And he missed going to sleep with Lisbon safely enfolded in his arms at night and waking up to find her in the same spot the next morning.

He missed Lisbon's dependency on him without the usual walls between them.

Missed having someone to love and protect.

Missed being that someone watching over her in moments of vulnerability.

The list went on and on.

However, he found great comfort in the knowing they wouldn't go back to the old days or their old relationship.

That was rapidly changing.

He'd seen to that.

Jarred from his thoughts by a sharp kick to the foot, Jane cast Lisbon a mildly reproaching smirk as he sat up to give her a place to sit. Settling on the couch beside him, Lisbon smirked back in that knowing way. As snarky as Jane was pretending to be, she wasn't about to apologize. She knew better. He was secretly glad she'd interrupted him and they both knew it.

"What do you say to meeting me at _Trevor's_ around eight tonight?" Lisbon asked as she studied her fingernails. "My reservation. My treat."

"Your reservation, your treat, huh?" Jane asked as though he was giving consideration to her generous offer.

"That's what I said." Lisbon repeated unnecessarily.

"Sounds tempting." Jane rose to his feet. "How can a man turn down an offer like that? Anything special we're celebrating?"

"Solving the Petrie case is as good a reason as any." Lisbon said. "That and the food's really good from what I remember."

"As the company's better, I think I can accept your offer." Jane lightly caressed her arm.

"Good." Lisbon smiled as she glanced at the hand resting on her arm. "I'll see you then."

Shaking his head as he settled back on his couch for yet another nap, Jane watched her scamper away smiling at the thought the woman had disappeared as fast as she'd appeared in the first place.

Almost like she thought she'd done something wrong in asking him out to dinner.

Go figure.

#####

Looking up from his cup of tea, the familiar red tinted China black, Jane glanced anxiously at the door. This evening had been Lisbon's idea and the eatery her choice. Surely she wasn't going to stand him up? While she was more than fashionably late as she'd been that first night, he seriously doubted it. Tonight was much too important to both of them.

More likely she was sitting in her car battling her memories and gathering her wits. It wouldn't do for Senior Agent Teresa Lisbon of the CBI to show up anywhere looking visibly shaken. That being said, Jane knew she was still having difficulties going certain places alone. Fortunately, she'd hidden her scars well enough to pass her psych eval and swiftly excelled at her duties as she always had. The woman was nothing if not determined.

However, there were still instances where mind over matter didn't work as well as it did in others.

Instances dictating quirky realities like grocery stores were no longer solo endeavors but places they went together.

That being said, Jane knew coming to _Trevor's_ couldn't be all that easy for her considering the associations.

Walking from the parking lot through that front door had to be even harder.

She'd refused his offer to meet her at her car insisting she was perfectly capable of joining him at their table.

Setting his cup aside as Lisbon suddenly walked through the door; Jane rose to his feet to await her arrival. Watching her following Amy as she had before, he took the opportunity to discretely give her the once over. She looked very pretty if a little strained around the eyes; but, that was to be expected. They'd had back to back difficult cases in neighboring towns. Cases necessitating they spend the past couple of weeks in hotels which hadn't been easy on Lisbon. In fact, they hadn't gotten back to Sacramento from their last case until yesterday evening.

That was when Lisbon had sprung the "thank you" dinner at _Trevor's_ on him. His response had never been in question. He wasn't about to turn her down.

Allowing his eyes to roam over Lisbon, Jane decided she must have swung by home to shower and change after work. She'd traded her jeans and blazer for a suit less casual and more reminiscent of the one she'd worn _that_ night. Another black dress suit with a deep claret silk blouse both possessing rhinestone buttons as the other outfit had. Again, her hair was softly curled and her make up more vivid than she usually wore. She was even wearing higher heels as she had that night.

It was abundantly clear to Jane that Lisbon was intent on recreating that evening up to the point where she gave it an entirely different ending. As to what that ending was, he hadn't a clue. But, he was willing to play along if it would give her the closure she needed.

"Lisbon." Jane said as he pulled her chair out feeling every bit of the déjà vu moment and knowing he'd reacted the same the first go around.

He could hardly say, "You look beautiful, Teresa, definitely worth the wait." She'd cold cock him for unprofessionalism and be on her way.

He'd have to settle for sharing his appreciation with a look for now. He would be more vocal later if Lisbon gave him the opportunity. Once he knew what she really had in mind.

And ascertained how far she wanted this evening to go.

"Jane." Lisbon said as he scooted her chair under the table silently conveying her thanks.

Smirking at Jane, Lisbon reached over to lift his cup to her lips not at all surprised to find him sipping the same tea he'd been drinking that night. A China red if she remembered right and just as tasty.

"So, what are we really celebrating?" Jane asked quietly knowing there was more to the evening than Lisbon was letting own.

"I'll let you know later. For now, just consider it returning the favor since you brought me here the first time." Lisbon said as she caught the eye of their waiter who immediately appeared by her side. "Bring us two of the Champagne Lagers, please, and I think we'll have the salmon cakes for Jane and the crab cakes for me."

If he'd had any doubts what Lisbon was up to, he didn't have any now.

"I hope you don't mind." Lisbon turned to Jane as Adam disappeared around the corner.

"No, I don't mind." Jane said calmly. "I take it we're recreating that evening?"

"We're giving it the ending it should have had." Lisbon said quietly refusing to look at Jane.

"I'll drink to that." Touching his glass to hers, Jane took a sip of water as he observed their fellow diners deciding Mr. Wonderful in the red tie had struck out a long time ago.

He was just too obnoxious to realize it.

He'd give it all of five minutes before the man's clearly disgusted blind date ditched him over dessert. Oh, well, he might be wrong on the timing; but, he was spot on with the results. Walking out the door leaving the loser fished mouthed in her wake was the smartest thing that cutie had ever done. Jane gave her a mental high five as he watched the abandoned date shrug his shoulders and dive back into his chocolate hazelnut cheesecake like nothing out of the ordinary had just occurred. Maybe it hadn't. For all Jane knew, his dates always ended like this.

"Adam's on his way back." Lisbon said quietly watching their familiar waiter walking across the room. "Why don't you place our order?"

"Ribeye medium rare, salad with house dressing on the side, and a loaded baked potato?" Jane asked knowing exactly what she wanted. "Ending with that decadent chocolate caramel brownie a la mode and coffee?"

"Yeah, that sounds about right." Lisbon agreed. "Are you doing the Filet or the chicken this time around?"

"There's no reason to tamper with a good thing." Jane reached out to rub the back of her hand. "I'll stick to what I had that evening as well."

"I don't think there is." Lisbon agreed as she flipped her palm up not at all surprised when Jane took her up on her silent offer encasing her hand in his.

"If I remember correctly, somewhere in here is where we discussed Volker. All I'm going to say on Tommy tonight is he's in a maximum security prison with no hope of escape. In a few months, he'll be on death row where he belongs. I'd say this chapter is almost closed for both of us. He'll never get out again." Jane was sure of that.

That cache of sick video tapes capturing every torturous murder for prosperity insured that. Even without Lisbon's testimony or those poor bodies in the morgue. The D.A.'s office was getting both plus some volatile insights from Jane. For once they were glad for his input. Even if his slant wasn't orthodox, the tips he was giving them were going to put the final nail in Volker's coffin. The D.A. could feel it in his bones.

The case was a slam dunk even a man of Volker's stature couldn't escape.

"I'd say you're right." Lisbon agreed. "It's time to move on."

"Yes, it is." Jane turned to Adam as he silently appeared to take their order before eventually turning his attention back to his companion once they were done.

"So, what do you want to talk about now?" Lisbon asked.

"Certainly not work." Jane said taking a sip of Lager. "And Volker is off limits from now on."

"Agreed." Lisbon took a sip of Jane's Lager just to get a rise. "Why don't you tell me about the woman at the bar? The beautiful redhead in the cream lace dress casting her eyes over here rather longingly when she thinks I'm not looking? You obviously know each other fairly well."

"Yeah, we do." Jane admitted. "Melinda's a regular on Thursday nights like me."

"I see." Lisbon said not sure what to make of that.

"I don't think you do." Jane said calmly. "We've talked a time or two. Mostly about you after I started coming back. That and the fact she needs to get out of her current line of work. She's still young, enchantingly lovely, and she's wasting a perfectly good life for an otherwise very nice girl."

"What line of work is that?" Lisbon asked not sure why she thought what she did as there was nothing overt about the woman's appearance or demeanor to make her do so.

"You already know." Jane said quietly.

"They let her do that in here?" Lisbon asked in disbelief.

"The mythical "they" don't let Mindy do anything. She comes in for dinner and a drink like any other respectable patron on nights she's free and leaves when she's done. If a lonely businessman or politician happens to follow her out to the parking lot, whatever they discuss before his return is between them. If he happens to ask her to join him at his table instead, it's the same. She's discrete to a fault and doesn't do business on the premises."

That's why nothing is done." Jane concluded.

"You know a lot for only having talked a time or two." Lisbon observed not at all put off by Jane's very obvious eye roll at her expense.

"Lisbon, Mindy is watching us because she's trying to decide if you're the illusive Teresa I've mentioned so much in passing." Jane said quietly as he laid his left hand on the table over hers. "She may also be wondering why I've done this."

As she knew he was irrevocably married to his past.

Or she thought he was.

"Jane?" Lisbon's right eyebrow raised in that way conveying so eloquently that she was totally baffled by his actions.

"Look in your right hand." Jane watched Lisbon unfurl her hand to expose the small band of gold resting on her palm.

"How?" Lisbon wasn't really sure she wanted to know exactly how his wedding band had gotten from his finger into her hand.

As she was sure it involved some kind of temporary mesmerizing, she might have to kill him if she did.

"A magician never reveals his secrets." Jane gave his pat answer. "As for the why, it's time."

"She's interested in you, Jane." Lisbon said still watching the other woman ignoring what she wasn't yet ready to face.

"Perhaps. But while she's a lovely woman with a kind heart not unlike someone else I know, my interests lay elsewhere and she knows it." Jane reassured Lisbon knowing if Mindy had ever had any doubts he was lying to her, she didn't now.

"He's still out there." Lisbon said quietly throwing yet another hurdle in front of them.

"Yes, he is, and we'll catch him when we catch him." Jane took the ring from her palm and dropped it in the pocket of her jacket. "I'm not giving up the chase, Lisbon. That'll never happen. Not until he's caught.

But, it's time to focus on other things and to live again."

"You really mean that?" Lisbon tried to read the truth in his eyes as Adam set their dinner before them.

"What do you think?" Jane wiggled his bare finger as their waiter discretely retreated before observing anything that was none of his business.

"As you've never done that before, I'd say yes." Lisbon answered honestly.

"You would be right." Lifting his knife, Jane cut into his steak as he watched Lisbon do the same as she digested this latest turn in their conversation. "Any serial killer hunting we do from now on, we do together. As everyone knows real partners should."

As well as he knew her, he bet her next remark would have nothing to do with them or the fact he'd just removed his wedding band for the first time since his wife's death. Or that he'd agreed not to leave her in the dark any longer. Not when it came to Red John or protecting her.

Jane laughed out loud at Lisbon's words.

He was exactly right.

"I think this steak is even better than it was the first time and I'm not sure that's really possible." Lisbon cut another bite of her steak. "Maybe it's just been so long since I've had a really good steak."

"Maybe it's the company." Jane smirked as he took a sip of tea.

"Shush, Jane." Lisbon said quietly as she ignored him in favor of digging into her perfectly baked potato.

While she'd had definite ideas when she'd asked him to join her for dinner, Lisbon wasn't sure she was ready to contemplate the removal of his wedding band. That signified far more than a first date ever could. Well, a second if she was honest; but, still, the ramifications of the gesture were huge and the affect on her heart rate was scary.

Jane was clearly offering far more than a few interesting tumbles between the sheets. And she wanted more. But, wanting and having were two different things. Now that the moment was clearly upon her, Lisbon wasn't sure how she felt about the door she'd opened crashing quite so wide so soon.

Cutting into her steak yet again, she carried the bite to her lips carefully avoiding Jane's eyes as they continued to eat in a companionable silence that wasn't nearly as awkward as it should be. He was clearly giving her time to think which she appreciated. Jane knew her far too well to push when it was better to wait her out. He chose to simply rest his hand atop of hers silently signaling he would be ready when she was willing to talk.

Enjoying her dinner in spite of the turmoil inside, Lisbon was overjoyed when Adam finally set their decadent dessert in front of them. It didn't matter the ice cream topped brownie signaled she was fast approaching the moment of no return, she was enjoying her evening with Jane bumps and all. She knew he felt the same.

Neither of them had expected this evening to go smooth as silk. That only happened in fiction and fantasies. Their complex lives were neither nor did they want them to be. Maybe a little less high drama; but, certainly not as ridiculously dull as perfect would be.

Savoring the last bite of gooey brownie before sipping the last of her perfectly doctored coffee, Lisbon caught Jane's eye silently urging herself into the biggest now or never moment she'd ever had.

"I think it's time we had that talk." Her voice sounded slighty squeaky to her ears.

"What talk is that, Teresa?" Jane quirked a brow indicating he wasn't going to make it easy for her.

He was a patient man.

But, his long-suffering came with a price.

"The one where I ask and you go home with me." There, she'd said it.

The next move was up to Jane.

"Or you could come home with me to my nice, new place." Jane said silently admitting it wasn't exactly new to him as he'd been living there for the better part of the last six months since he'd left her apartment.

"Nice, new place?" Lisbon played along like she didn't know what he was talking about.

"Yeah, the one you know about but haven't seen." Jane clarified.

"Oh, that one." Lisbon smiled thinking he was right. She did know about _that_ place; but, as he'd said, she'd never seen it. No one had except Jane. "You know, I think I can do…Follow you home to your nice, new place."

"I think I'd like that." Jane agreed motioning for Adam to bring the check going on _his_ credit card whether Lisbon liked it or not.

#####

Allowing Jane to open her car door, Lisbon rose to her feet and surveyed the exterior of the townhouse she'd followed him to. He was right. Though she'd never been here, she certainly knew about his latest acquisition. How could she not? He'd surprised her about a week before she'd returned to work with photographs of eight or ten condos and townhouses he was evaluating for purchase.

She'd been rather shocked at the prospect and asked him point blank if he'd lost his mind. She'd been rather surprised by his answer.

It seemed her kidnapping had been a turning point in Jane's life. He'd realized, after all of these years, that contrary to what he'd always believed, he'd put down permanent roots in Sacramento long ago. He wasn't leaving the CBI any time soon even if they caught Red John tomorrow. So, he'd reached the conclusion it was foolish to keep camping out in the attic and mangy hotel rooms. It was time to settle down in a place of his own like a normal human being instead of a shadow rat though they both knew he was far from normal.

Lisbon had found herself agreeing with all of that.

Jane had then asked her opinion in narrowing his choices down to three or four as they were all of a similar size and located in similar neighborhoods. He'd indicated the ones he found most favorable and asked for her input. Not surprisingly, she thought he'd done a remarkable job in selecting the three she thought most suited to his needs from far too many choices.

However, she did think he'd overlooked the true diamond in the rough. With a relatively inexpensive tweak here and there, the two storied townhouse in one of the tonier parts of town would be perfect for Jane. He'd probably never move again. The only question she'd had was why on earth he was considering properties much too large for a single man? After listening to him spin some fantasy about all the reasons he liked his space, Lisbon decided she really didn't want to know.

Smiling at her deliberate obtrusiveness, Jane was pleased his ploy had played out better than he'd planned. He'd discovered which of the properties Lisbon liked the best and why. He'd also known he could work with that. The changes she'd mentioned had amounted to little more than a few coats of paint and some tile replacement. Not that significant when one considered the price of the place. The far more expensive replacing of the kitchen appliances and counter tops had been his idea.

Lisbon was studying the results in front of her now.

"Wow." Was all she could say followed by a heartfelt, "Nice digs, Jane."

They should be. He'd had a good six months to get everything right.

From what she could see, he'd taken her advice about the changes and painted the walls more neutral colors allowing his décor to make the statement instead of the canvas. Not that she was stupid enough to think he'd really needed her input. He was Jane. Oh, and he'd had the master bath retiled in a striking, updated pattern. While she hadn't yet seen that change, Jane had showed her the samples long ago. He'd also replaced the kitchen counter tops and replaced the appliances with a professional grade as well. While that last step was unnecessary in Lisbon's opinion, it was Jane's home and Jane's money.

How he spent his ill gotten gains had nothing to do with her.

"I take it you like the place?" Jane swaggered over to the bar to pour Cognac into two snifters pleased by her reaction before walking back to hand Lisbon one of the scantly filled glasses.

As they'd both only had a single Lager with dinner, one small after dinner drink wasn't likely to affect either of them in any appreciable way.

"Love it." Lisbon confirmed deciding it wasn't exactly what she'd expected from Jane. "Strong, masculine pieces heavy on carved solid woods and good quality leather with a touch of marble, gilding, and glass thrown in for good measure…What's not to like?"

She'd seen Malibu and thought modern pieces more to his taste.

Maybe his tastes had simply been influenced by his home as they seemed to be now. Or maybe the influence had been Angela. None of that mattered now. His current furnishings were more in keeping with the heavy Spanish stucco and tile influence of his townhouse than modern would be.

Taking another look around her, Lisbon decided she really, really liked what he'd done with his home.

"It's a nice place in a safe neighborhood and a good investment when we decide to move on." Jane said watching her eyes widen slightly at the unexpected "we." If Lisbon had any doubts she'd heard him right, she'd find out the truth of it soon enough. "I was lucky to get it at fire sale prices. The owner was transferred to DC rather suddenly and wanted to dump it as quickly as he could for not much more than he needed to pay cash for his new place. As he'd lived here a long time, he still made a tidy profit compared to his purchase price. My agent happened to get wind of the listing before it hit the Open Market and knew it was perfect for my needs. I saw no reason to play games and offered what Leon was asking. As it was substantially below the property's worth, the rest is history." Jane informed her.

"So you got it for a steal." Lisbon smirked thinking that sounded just like Jane.

"Something like that." Jane agreed not at all repentant he'd ripped another man off as he would have willingly paid a tidy sum more without batting an eyelash. "With the owner's blessing."

"Which amused you greatly I think." Lisbon said as she savored the smooth finish of the XO in her glass.

"Which amused me greatly you know." Jane agreed deciding this was a particularly nice bottle of Cognac and wondered briefly why he hadn't bought this brand in years. "Want the grand tour?"

"The tour that ends in your bedroom with an offer to show me some hokey, nonexistent sketches?" Lisbon smirked around her snifter deciding she really liked the amber liquid and the warm fuzzy feeling it was putting in the pit of stomach.

Or maybe it was Jane's presence that was doing that.

"If that's what you'd like." Jane answered honestly.

"I think I might." Lisbon agreed.

"Then I'll show you as much or as little as you want to see." Jane said as he poured a splash more Cognac in her glass.

"Are you trying to get me drunk?" It would take a heck of a lot more than this to get her inebriated and Jane knew it.

"Do I need to?" Jane asked as he set the glass aside.

"What do you think?" Lisbon reached up to touch his cheek.

"I'm going to say no." Jane's brow rose slightly as he leaned in to brush his lips across hers pleased at her response to his touch.

"You'd be right." Lisbon agreed resting her forehead against his chest.

It wasn't the first time Jane had kissed her and it wouldn't be the last. They'd been sharing the briefest of promising touches since he'd freed her from Volker's clutches.

As strange as their interactions seemed to Dr. Osborne considering what she'd been through, Lisbon had never had any qualms about having Jane around her from the start. She'd never had any intentions of pushing him away. Or if she had, he hadn't allowed her to. She wasn't the typical survivor and he wasn't the typical someone in her life. He was that someone in her life who'd intimately shared her nightmare.

It was only natural she'd gravitate towards the one person in her universe truly capable of understanding what she'd been through.

Added to that, they'd been close for a long time now. He'd been by her side through a lot of nightmares over the years as she'd been by his. She trusted Jane and knew he would never hurt her. Not physically anyway. The man had killed for her more than once. He'd have gladly killed Volker if given half a chance.

More importantly, Lisbon knew she'd never have made it without Jane's calming presence. Especially once she'd watched those videos and seen the evils Volker meant to visit on her but hadn't. She was a hardboiled cop. She'd seen many atrocities in her years in law enforcement. Horrors bringing seasoned officers to their knees hadn't fazed her. She'd never expected the nightmares that followed.

The one's replacing those other victims' faces with her own.

Mercifully, Jane was there for her through it all and he was still here now.

That counted for something.

Something big.

"What do you say to that tour now?" Jane asked quietly.

"Works for me. Why don't you start with telling me why you needed a three bedroom, two and a half bath townhouse complete with an office, laundry, and separate dining room?"

"I might want to invite the team for a sleep over?" Jane quipped.

"I don't think so." Lisbon followed him into the office that had probably been a slightly small fourth bedroom once upon a time and could be again.

Or maybe it had always been what it was: a perfectly sized office with built-in shelves which made a lot more sense though she suspected the shelves had been added later.

"The price was too good to pass up for what I was getting." Jane answered honestly. "Besides, you liked this place best of all. I saw how your eyes lit up when you looked at it."

"While that may be true, why would what I like influence your decision to such a degree?" Lisbon asked as she walked around the office deciding the room already had anything a person could need from adequate shelving to a top of the line computer, monitor and printer setup.

"Maybe I'm hoping you'll spend a fair amount of time here." Jane answered honestly. "I certainly don't need an office; but, you do."

While her eyes widened perceptively, Lisbon said nothing exactly as he'd expected. Taking advantage of her silence, Jane showed her the half bath and the laundry room before leading her up the stairs. He didn't need to show her the kitchen, dining area or den as she'd already seen them.

"Here's the first of the two guest rooms. There's a full bath across the hall next to the master suite." Jane opened the doors not all that surprised that Lisbon stepped into each room to take an in depth look around.

It was obvious she liked what he'd done with the place from her smiles and nodding head.

"I like it." Lisbon said somewhat surprised he'd bother furnishing every room.

One guest room she could see; but, two? It wasn't like he had company. Not unless he was living a secret life she knew nothing about. Then again, she was talking about Jane. Learning that he was really wouldn't surprise her all that much.

"I'm glad." Jane said with his hand resting against the door he'd yet to open for good reason.

"Is this where you offer to show me those sketches?" Lisbon couldn't help cracking up at the look on his face.

"Nah, just the master suite." Jane pushed the door open letting her see the heavy Spanish influenced bedroom suit and the doorway leading into the beautifully tiled master bath.

"You out did yourself." Lisbon walked around the room deciding she couldn't find any fault with anything from the heavily ornate mahogany bed covered with a beautiful navy and gold comforter to the strongly carved chest of drawers.

While not necessarily what she'd have chosen, there was nothing she didn't like. More importantly, everything about the décor suited the ambiance and it suited Jane. A little too strikingly masculine for her tastes, it was nothing a woman's touch couldn't easily soften.

Lisbon wasn't sure how she felt about that…Yes, she was…She didn't like that idea at all.

Not unless that woman doing the softening was her.

"I'm glad you like it." Jane said easily reading Lisbon's mind. "What do you say to going back down stairs and finishing those drinks?"

"Sounds like a plan." Lisbon said as she gave the room one last look.

Following her down the stairs, Jane smiled at the back of her head. Lisbon was already seeing those woman's touches in her mind which was why he'd left those last bits he was fully capable of doing undone. To get her thoughts turned in the direction he wanted them to go.

"So, what do you think?" Jane asked unnecessarily as he sank into the oversized leather sofa.

"You already know what I think." Lisbon said as she accepted the silent offer of his widespread arms and settled down the length of his body snuggling into her familiar Jane pillow. "I like everything about the place from the layout to what you've done. It's very Jane and it suits you."

Jane smiled as he felt her hand unconsciously running over his chest in a less than innocent manner. In fact, she was already unbuttoning his vest under the guise of finding his buttons uncomfortable to lie upon. She'd used that excuse a few times before. He'd let her unfasten his vest then. He'd enjoyed the feel of her small palm resting over his heart through his shirt much as he was enjoying it now.

Jane couldn't help thinking he wouldn't be at all surprised if Lisbon reached across him to set her glass on the coffee table before wriggling up his body exactly as she was presently doing. Not that he minded. He didn't mind at all. He found her actions rather erotic and enticing. Especially the way she was staring into his eyes with a look saying she wasn't quite sure if she should do what she was contemplating.

He hoped she would.

Deciding to give her a helping hand, Jane pressed his lips against hers letting Lisbon dictate the pace and intensity. He knew he'd made the right decision when her hands cupped the sides of his head holding him exactly where she wanted him. If he didn't miss his guess, the woman had her eyes closed and a smile on her face.

Nope, he wasn't wrong.

Teresa Lisbon kissed with her eyes closed.

He'd have to give her hell about that one.

But, he'd do it later when it might not interfere with the rest of their evening.

"As enjoyable as I find making out on your couch, I think I'd rather be in your bed." Lisbon whispered against his ear as she reached for her Cognac.

"Teresa?" Jane let the unanswered question hang between them knowing he wasn't going to push anything.

There was a mighty big difference between a sweetly erotic, lightheartedly hot make-out session on his couch and serious skin on skin action.

"Maybe." Lisbon's gaze wavered nervously. "I can't promise anything; but, I'd like to try."

"So would I." Jane admitted not making a move.

"Jane." Lisbon started at his admission not quite prepared for the nervous lurch of her insides at the thought.

"It's okay, Teresa." Jane pulled her into his arms. "If you can't, you can't. I'll be happy just to hold you for a few hours like I used to do."

If nothing else came out of their second date, the woman was going to call him "Patrick" consistently before the night was over.

Her "Damn it, Jane." was muffled against his shoulder.

"We're in this together." Jane reminded her. "I can wait as long as it takes."

"Yeah, well, maybe I can't." Lisbon reached out to unbutton his shirt ignoring the first stirrings of panic battling desire deep in her belly.

This was Jane and it had taken entirely too long to get to this moment.

"Don't push anything when it isn't necessary." Jane reminded her. "As you've put up with my issues for a decade, I can wait a few months until you're ready."

"It's been over a decade and you shouldn't have to wait." Lisbon rebelled. "Neither should I. Not because of that bastard."

"What should or shouldn't be doesn't really matter." Jane said quietly. "Only what is."

"You're a wonderful man." In spite of all the times she'd wanted to shoot him, when it came to the important stuff, he usually wa. Wonderful.

"Not so wonderful or I wouldn't have let this happen." Jane told her honestly.

"You couldn't stop it." Lisbon corrected him. "Neither of us could."

They'd worked through all of that a while back.

"Then I should have manned up and made you mine a long time ago." He'd felt that way for quite a while.

"Neither of us was ready." Lisbon admitted what they both knew. "Besides, it would only have made what happened worse. It might have torn us apart instead of bringing us together. I'm not sure I could handle it if that happened."

"And we're ready now?" Ignoring the latter part of her statement as he knew she wanted, Jane indicated his willingness to let her lead the way.

"I think so." Though, from her tone, Lisbon clearly wasn't sure.

Silently standing, Jane took Lisbon's hand and drew her to her feet. Reaching over to grab his snifter, he poured the Cognac from Lisbon's glass into his own. They really didn't need two when sharing one would work much better. Wrapping an arm around her shoulders, Jane was pleased when her arm wrapped around his waist against his skin and her head leaned into his chest in response. Leading them in the direction of the stairs, he dropped a kiss on the top of her head carefully absorbing every nuance of Lisbon's demeanor.

The woman was so stubborn she probably wouldn't say anything if she changed her mind. Not until she'd reacted in a way that set them back a ways first. He was determined that wasn't going to happen. At the slightest hint she was having second thoughts, he was stopping this before it went any farther.

Releasing Lisbon, Jane walked across the room to set their glass on his bedside table. Walking back, he waited for the woman standing in front of him to determine his next action. Reaching out, Lisbon took his hands and brought them to the buttons of her blouse. While she was more interested in keeping her concerns at bay than verbalizing her desires at the moment, she could certainly show him what she wanted. Doing as she asked, Jane slowly unfastened the bejeweled buttons of that lovely silk blouse bringing out the creaminess of Lisbon's skin so well.

"Teresa?" Jane's eyebrow rose at his first sight of the pretty deep claret lace and silk bra matching her blouse so perfectly.

He knew Lisbon had a drawer full of the multicolored bits of lace and satin as well as another filled with the serviceable neutrals she favored for everyday wear. He'd seen both with his own two eyes over the years. Not just a few months ago when he'd had to pack her bag for the hospital or when he'd done her laundry in the weeks after. It was just that, while he knew she had such garments, he hadn't expected her to be wearing anything so wickedly enticing so soon.

Not after what she'd been through and certainly never for him.

"Patrick, I asked you out to dinner with intent." Lisbon said quietly against his ear trying out his name for size yet again. "As I've already said, I thought it was time we had that talk."

"I can see that." Jane responded.

"Do you?" She glanced down fleetingly at the bits of lace and silk he found so mesmerizing. "Besides the fact I know you're man enough to appreciate the effort, I refuse let Volker rob me of such a simple pleasure. He's out of my life and he can't hurt me again. I won't act like he can.

In case you don't believe that, I went to the store by myself on the way to restaurant tonight. I bought some Red Delicious apples and a bottle of that Merlot you like. We can get them out of the trunk later tonight or tomorrow."

"What grocery story, Lisbon?" Jane didn't need to ask.

"You know the one." Lisbon said. "I even parked in the same parking space."

"I don't know whether to applaud you or turn you over my knee." Jane said honestly finally understanding why she was late to the restaurant again.

"Why don't you kiss me instead?" Lisbon said. "We can fight about what I did later. It just seemed like a good thing to do at the time as I was already driving right by the place. Besides, I can't let what happened dictate the rest of my life. I won't give him that pleasure."

"I can do that." Drawing her into his arms, Jane willingly complied with her order.

There was something addictive about kissing Lisbon. She tasted as spicy as she smelled. As for Lisbon, she obviously felt the same from the hands wrapping through his hair and the lips pressing rather forcefully against his. Not that he was complaining. Lisbon could kiss him any way she damned well pleased.

He was particularly fond of the erotic dance their tongues were engaging in at the moment. Hot and distracting, it spoke of dangerous delights worth exploring further.

A few minutes later Jane wondered exactly when he'd lost control of the situation. Obviously somewhere between a daintily persistent tongue passing his lips and soft body pressing into his promising untold delights…Not that it really mattered…He was, however, mildly surprised at finding himself very naked flat on his back on his bed tangled in a highly compromising position with one Teresa Lisbon…He gotten far more wrapped up in those kisses than he'd realized it seemed…The only thing he could say in his favor was Lisbon had lost her bra and most of her clothes as well somewhere along the way…That and she had lovely breasts if he'd every had any doubts.

"Jane, I can't do this." Lisbon said forgetting to call him "Patrick" as she'd intended . "Not like this."

"It's alright, Teresa." Jane said wiping the tears from her cheeks with the pads his thumbs. "We can wait until you're ready." He reassured her deciding this moment had to be one of the hardest he'd ever lived through in his life.

Not as hard as the night his family died or waking up in a padded cell; but, still hard enough.

There was something about having a scantily clad Lisbon straddling his very naked body and doing absolutely nothing that strained his resolve to the limits.

"That's not what I'm saying." Lisbon said gently correcting him. "Not what I'm saying at all."

"Then what are you saying?" Jane was genuinely puzzled by her words.

"We can't do it like this." Lisbon repeated. "As much as I've fantasized about this in the past…." Lisbon looked down, blushing slightly at the smirk on Jane's face at the thought she'd dreamed about dominating him, and couldn't believe she was admitting to having imagined straddling him in just such an intimate fashion in the past. Then again, who wouldn't want to dominate Jane in some fashion or another just to prove they could. The man was such a royal pain in the ass. Now wasn't any different than the norm. "I can't take you."

She hoped he got what she was really saying.

So much of her life was about control that it often leeched into the bedroom; but, for some odd reason, she'd never wanted that scenario with Jane. Not their first time anyway. Down the road might be a different matter…especially when he made her mad. She'd been tempted to use those cuffs on him more than once when he'd gotten on her last nerve though not in a sexual manner. But, right now, the thought of dictating their encounter left her cold.

And afraid in ways she didn't want to consider.

"Teresa, you'd never hurt me so get that crazy thought out of your head." Jane knew she'd had to battle the backlash of anger washing over her those first few weeks some of which was justifiably aimed in his direction.

Some was due, in part, to her so foolishly watching those videos.

But, he knew as well, that she'd laid most of that to rest over time. He'd helped her to do it late at night when the CBI gym was deserted. He'd held that punching bag allowing her to give into her all consuming rage. He'd gotten the bruises to prove it. And he'd gotten to hold her when she'd fallen apart after reassuring her the release of all that pent up emotion was for the best.

"As for what you really need, all you have to do is tell me." Jane said quietly. "I'll give you anything you want."

"I need you to make love to me." Lisbon closed her eyes forcing the whisper between her lips. "I need _you_ to take _me_."

Digesting her words, Jane knew they were on the edge of a very high precipice. How he dictated coming events would make or break their future. They both had very natural reservations about what they were doing as anyone should.

"May I?" Jane asked as he placed his hands on either side of her hips under the pretty little bows pretending to hold a certain wisp of fabric between her thighs.

Silently nodding, Lisbon tamped down on any lingering fears giving him the permission they both needed to proceed.

Slipping his fingers in the sides of her panties, Jane smoothly slid them down Lisbon's legs. Angling her hips to take what was rightfully his, he captured her eyes one last time before taking the step that couldn't be undone. Seeing the flare of panic in her eyes, Jane waited for the protest that never came accepting the lips sloppily pressed against his.

If there was one thing he could say about the woman, she wasn't a coward and she wasn't about to let anything stop her once her mind was made up.

Breaking their kiss and looking deep into his eyes, Lisbon felt the sharp slash of panic dissipating as quickly as it had come.

It was Jane breeching her defenses and Jane now deeply seated where she'd wanted him for much too long. Meeting him halfway, Lisbon pressed her lips against his again not at all surprised to feel a steadying hand behind her head as he leaned in to deepen the kiss between them. Breaking apart as the need for oxygen grew too great, Jane lightly stroked her hair away from her cheek.

"Consider yourself taken, My Dear." Jane whispered in her ear before kissing his way back to her lips. "The rest is up to you."

Closing her eyes, Lisbon allowed her body to succumb to the guidance of the hands gently gripping her hips. If she'd ever doubted she loved Jane down to her soul; she didn't doubt it now. How could she fail to love a man who knew what she needed before she did? That he had initiated the intimacies between them in such a way only to pull back and return the control to her spoke volumes of the relationship between them. That such a concession came at a high price was evident in the straining lines of his body.

"I'd say that's definitely a good place to start." Jane said as he flipped them yet again. "But, I think this is even better."

"I thought you said the rest was up to me?" Lisbon teased as she shifted to better accommodate Jane's larger form.

"I changed my mind." Jane smiled at her knowing smirk. "What can I say, you're just too sexy for your own good."

"Shush, Jane." Lisbon closed her eyes and arched her back enjoying the leisurely teasing way he was filling her.

She didn't need anything intense at the moment. Jane's lighthearted, easy loving was everything she needed to crash through the last of the frozen walls surrounding her. There would plenty of time to worship each other after the ice was broken. There would be plenty of time for laughter and tears. Plenty of time for rough, raw, heated passion. All she wanted right now was to feel what he was doing to her so well.

Jane was giving her plenty of opportunity to do just that.

Taking the shifting of her body allowing him deeper penetration as encouragement, Jane continued the subtle rocking of his hips much to Lisbon's delight. While she wasn't adverse to limit pushing intensity, there was something to be said for steady perseverance. And her man was nothing if not persistent.

They would be well satisfied when he was done.

#####

Raising up on one elbow to gaze at the woman at his side, Jane decided Lisbon crazy beautiful in her dishabille.

Even naked, sweaty and spent with her eyes half closed.

Reaching out to drag one finger over the arm resting on top of the covers, he smiled gently as Lisbon turned slightly to cock an eye at him passion bruised lips parted as though she had something to say.

"Are you okay?" He asked quietly.

"Why wouldn't I be?" Lisbon asked simply. "I'm with Jane."

A seriously hot, naked, sweaty Jane that still managed to look finer than a man had a right to look. Justing lying her beside him was twisting her gut in ways no one else ever had. It was all she could do not to touch him. Touch him and do unspeakable things that might utterly shock him. She so wasn't telling him that. The man's head was big enough as it was without encouragement.

"Is that so?" He couldn't keep the amusement out of his tone.

"Yeah, that's so." Lisbon agreed. "Do you seriously think I'm going to allow anything to rob me of the pleasure of finally getting you where I've wanted you for years?"

"I'd say I've finally got you where I've wanted you for years." Jane smirked at her suspecting he may have been having wayward thoughts about her long before she remotely considered having any about him.

"I'd say it's a win-win situation for both of us." Lisbon whispered against his ear.

"I'd have to agree." Drawing her closer, he dropped a kiss on her lips as he splayed a steadying hand across her belly.

Almost against her will, Lisbon reached down to caress that hand inordinately fascinated by his empty finger.

"It's not going to remain bare forever." Jane said confidently as he wiggled his finger at her yet again.

"Yeah?" Lisbon couldn't bring herself to ask what he was saying without actually saying anything.

"Yeah." Jane agreed. "I have a pretty strong suspicion you'll put your mark there when you're ready. Just know I prefer yellow gold."

"You do, huh?" Lisbon said not sure exactly which statement she was responding to.

Tossing them all around in her head for size, she found she liked both of them.

"I do." Jane said confidently. "In case you've forgotten, I'm a betting man and I'd say the odds are strongly in my favor."

"Is that a round-about proposal?" Lisbon asked deciding the best approach was the most direct.

"More like a promise." Jane looped his fingers through hers. "You aren't ready for the other any time soon; but, when you are, I may ask for real."

"And I might say yes." She gave him the answer they both knew she would.

"I'm counting on it." Jane lifted her hand to his lips. "I've always wanted you, Teresa. Even when I knew I shouldn't."

He'd found her a compelling woman from the start. Even when he hadn't been sure he liked her. He certainly hadn't trusted her and he'd known it.

All of that had changed with time.

Not the compelling part but the trust. He'd grown to trust Lisbon more than anyone and that was saying a lot. In time, he'd grown to love and desire her as well.

As he was sure she loved him.

"You have me." Lisbon was surprised she meant it exactly as it sounded.

Permanently.

No matter who blew a gasket over their unlikely liaison.

Frankly, she didn't care. The CBI higher ups could step straight to hell and take Red John with them. It was where they belonged if they tried to interfere in her personal life. That so wasn't happening. Not this time.

As far as Lisbon was concerned, she was with Jane now and he clearly felt the same.

That was all that mattered.

#####

A/N: Thank you for sticking with me through this story. While there are two or three chapters after the rescue that will get some serious rewriting once I've had some time away from this story, for the moment we are done.

The final chapter of Ouroborus will be up before the week is over.

I am departing for a while to work on a couple of my real life novels. I have received some helpful feedback and have quite a bit of editing that needs to be done. Departing, but not leaving entirely.

I still have 3 unfinished stories that I intend to finish.

If there's one you'd like to see finished before the others, let me know. Otherwise, I'll work here and there on all three that are now more AU than Canon. Strangely, my interest got hi-jacked by two other stories which doesn't usually happen. What can I say other than Bad Calla? ~Calla


	15. Chapter 14

04-14-13

Thank You.

I may be violating some rule in writing A/N's as separate chapters. If I am, I'm sorry.

However, I get enough guest reviews (and regular reviews) that I can't let them go without saying a heartfelt "Thank You." for taking the time to write me and for the PM's I've gotten along the way. It's greatly appreciated. More than you know since I always feel guilty for throwing things up that are so rough. Unfortunately, I write fanfics the way I write novels. They must be finished before I get into the serious editing and rewriting or they'd never get finished!

Thank you for appreciating me. I hope you all know I appreciate all of you just as much!

If you haven't figured it out by now; yes, I'm very southern so "thank yous" are very important to me! ~Calla

P.S. I'll be posting a new story called "Darkness Into Light" in the next few days. Probably slightly ahead of or about the time I post that last chapter of Ouroborus which is almost finished. I can only write so much fluff in a stretch and I have to be working on more than one thing at a time.

I can't really tell you anything about the story as it's in the beginning stages beyond it's angsty, completely babyless, and Red John is more involved than usual.

Oh, and no matter what happens, it won't end unhappily. While I could probably end a story less than happy; I don't think you guys would let me get away with it and I think it would haunt me forever!:)

~Calla


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